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  • Number of visits : 6811
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GooglyFML's favorite FMLs

Today, my wife was in seemingly never-ending labor. It got so bad, I overheard a nurse in the doorway mutter to a coworker that she hoped my baby would just die or something, so she could finally go take a smoke break. FML


I agree, your life sucks (36995) - you deserved it (1927)

On 07/10/2015 at 9:23pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I told my boyfriend how my mom died when I was 11 after crashing her car into a tree at night. He muttered "Women drivers." FML

Today, at my sister's wedding, she and I had a plan that she would purposely throw the bouquet to my girlfriend, then I would propose in front of everyone. When the bouquet landed in my girlfriend's lap, she screamed, "Ew, no way" and threw it to someone else. FML


I agree, your life sucks (31891) - you deserved it (3427)

On 06/23/2015 at 10:48pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my neighbor's son siphoned the fuel out of my lawn mower and put it in his car. What he didn't realize is that the fuel mixture I use in my lawn mower would ruin his car engine. His dad says it's my fault and actually insists I should pay his pissant son's repair bill. FML


I agree, your life sucks (35164) - you deserved it (1933)

On 06/13/2015 at 8:42am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I found out that my husband really thinks onion rings are seafood. He's 36. FML


I agree, your life sucks (23802) - you deserved it (2361)

On 06/07/2015 at 8:53pm - misc - by onionrings (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, a customer called the Chinese restaurant where I work and complained about her takeout order not including donuts. After informing her that we don't have them, she started to curse at me while citing the website as proof. She thought wontons were synonymous with donuts. FML

Today, I overheard my wife telling my mother-in-law I was diagnosed with a learning disability earlier this week. She replied, "I always knew he was a retard. Why did you ever marry that idiot?" All my wife did was mutter "I don't know." FML


I agree, your life sucks (28911) - you deserved it (2181)

On 06/04/2015 at 5:08am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Maldives (Maale)

Today, my hateful mother-in-law showed up unexpectedly. I faked taking a phone call so the bitter old hag would leave me alone. She then pulled out her phone, called my number, and glared at me as my phone rang against my ear. FML


I agree, your life sucks (26862) - you deserved it (12264)

On 05/31/2015 at 12:47am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, while driving home from work, I saw my boyfriend mugging a woman on the sidewalk. FML


I agree, your life sucks (33792) - you deserved it (3123)

On 05/30/2015 at 3:28am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my dog was knocked unconscious. I had to race him to the vet and pay a small fortune for x-rays and shots. All because he ran into the kitchen at full speed and smashed headfirst into the refrigerator after hearing me open a bag of turkey. FML

Today, my housemates are throwing a huge house party to celebrate finishing their finals. It's 4:30am and people are still arriving. I have my last final in 3 hours. FML


I agree, your life sucks (29784) - you deserved it (2203)

On 05/24/2015 at 9:59pm - misc - by Party Pooper - United States

Today, my dad came to my 8-year-old daughter's birthday party wearing a shirt that said "Small penis, huge dick." FML


I agree, your life sucks (29145) - you deserved it (2348)

On 05/23/2015 at 3:03am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I bought an expensive video game and decided to show it off and post a photo of it on Instagram. When I got home to play it, it rejected my activation key. I then realised it was showing in the Instagram post. FML


I agree, your life sucks (13036) - you deserved it (44607)

On 05/17/2015 at 9:09am - misc - by PISSED OFF - Australia

Today, I went to a domestic violence counseling group. I was the only male there, and I explained that my girlfriend punches me in the face in front of my kids. Everyone started laughing. FML

Today, I had the most excitement I have felt in the last two months when I went to a drugstore and they had my favourite bandaids. FML


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Friday 27 November 2015

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