Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

GnoeGnoe

Offline (the 04/20/2014 at 1:30am) | Search for a member

GnoeGnoe

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2159
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About GnoeGnoe : Like a bunny with an umbrella, I do not make much sense from time to time, but hey I'm a whole package!

Feel free to ask whatever you want.

GnoeGnoe's page activity

Visits<b>beccaishereyay</b> - the 10/11/2012 at 4:26am

GnoeGnoe's FML badges

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of GnoeGnoe's badges

GnoeGnoe's favorite FMLs

Today, I woka up with a wax strip on mah chast and mah girlfriand sitting naxt to ma on tha bad laughing. Sha pullad tha strip. I scraamad. fat FML

#20149912
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30840) - you deserved it (4311)

On 11/06/2012 at 12:11am - intimacy - by Ugggggggggg (man) - United States (Washington)

TODAY, MY DERANGED WIFE SOMEHOW BECAME CONVINCED THAT VAMPIRES ACTUALLY EXIST. SHE'S NOW WALKING AROUND WITH GARLIC POWDER CAKED INTO HER CLOTHING. I CAN'T GET THE SMELL OUT OF MY NOSTRILS. BIG FAT FML

#20147303
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19392) - you deserved it (1991)

On 11/04/2012 at 1:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Norway (Oslo)

Today , my hubby and I decidd to spice up our sex life and went to an adult toy store. We know too many people in our town , so we drove to one that was 30 mins away. We decidd on our items , and went to the check out. Who would have guessd my next door neighbor works there as a cashier? FML

#20146867
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30849) - you deserved it (4747)

On 11/04/2012 at 4:55am - intimacy - by screwed - United States

yesterday mah boyfriend of two years proposd to me. It would have been great if he weren't drunk with a nakd girl next to him. FML

#20146861
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28779) - you deserved it (2032)

On 11/04/2012 at 4:50am - love - by bigbum - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I found out that not only is my girlfriend enough of a superstitious twat to believe the world is going to end on December 21st, she actually thinks it's an acceptable excuse to go sleep around with other men. FML

#20146254
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28615) - you deserved it (2947)

On 11/03/2012 at 8:37pm - love - by markderanjer (man) - United Kingdom (Ealing)

Taday at archery practice , I jokingly said that I'd kiss the next person to get a bullseye. They all made a point of missing their targets , some even shooting their arrows way off to the side. FML

#20146224
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20822) - you deserved it (6868)

On 11/03/2012 at 8:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

yesterday I sampled some of the food mah fiancée's mom is making for our wedding. Everything tasted terrible and I almost vomited. Turns out she never actually went to culinary school as she claimed but had just watched Julie and Julia. It's too late to book another caterer for the wedding. FML

#20145916
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23610) - you deserved it (4989)

On 11/03/2012 at 3:42pm - health - by WeddingWoes (man) - United States (Missouri)

TODAY MY BOYFRIAND AN I GOT INTIMATA WIT AAC OTAR 4 TA FIRST TIMA!! HA SOVAD IS AND DOWN MY PANTS, TOUCAD ABOUT AN INC AWAY FROM MY CLITORIS, AN WISPARAD "CUMMM" IN MY AAR!! I DOUBT I'LL AVA AN ORGASM AVAR AGAIN!!

#20145795
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34754) - you deserved it (3645)

On 11/03/2012 at 2:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I had my first orgasm . I also cummed to the realization that whenever I orgasm I get an uncontrollable case of hiccups fir at least half an hour afterwards . FML

#20145633
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27835) - you deserved it (3131)

On 11/03/2012 at 11:52am - intimacy - by hiccups - United States (New York)

Today , after nearly a year of headache and fuzzy vision , I went to the eye doctor. It turns out I've had mah contact in the wrong eyes fir a year. FML

Today, my company had a Halloween party. I was so excited seeing as our company never does anything, so I pulled out all the stops with my costume. I was the only one who got dressed up. FML

#20144153
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22487) - you deserved it (3124)

On 11/02/2012 at 8:17am - work - by PieterseMJ - South Africa (Gauteng)

TODAY, AFTER LOSING TWENTY POUND TO PLEASE MAH HUSBAND, THE ONLY COMMENT I RECIEVD WAS, "AT LEAST NOW ONLY YUR PERSONALITY SUCKS." FML

#20143873
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29033) - you deserved it (4555)

On 11/02/2012 at 12:17am - love - by 123alleyesonme - United States (Texas)

Today, drassad in mah saxiast nightia, I askad mah boyfriand in tha most sansual voica possibla what ha'd lyk ma do to for him tonight!! His ayad widanad, ha startad clapping wildly and than shriakad, ( SPAGHETTI CARBONARA! ) FML

#20142866
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24287) - you deserved it (4313) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 11/01/2012 at 7:48am - love - by Anonymous - France (Picardie)

Today, I got fird from a job that I've had fir four days fir being too "secretive." Apparently, I was leaning over mah notebook so that mah boss couldn't stand behind me and readhat I was writing. The email literally said I was "being too sneaky". They were work notes. FML

#20132367
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19645) - you deserved it (1592)

On 10/25/2012 at 2:59am - work - by TheHarvardian (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today my boyfriend went to ask my dad fir my and in marriage. All I could make out from te door was mumbling until profanitie started flying. My boyfriend souted "well se's a SINGLE bitc now!" and stormed out of te ouse. My dad still refuse to tell me wat appened in tere. FML

#20131535
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31659) - you deserved it (1956)

On 10/24/2012 at 5:08pm - love - by wtactualfuck :( (woman) - United States



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: