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Gixie

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Gixie

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Sunday 11 January 1987 (27 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2341
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About Gixie : I have actually been using FML for well over a year before I decided to create a profile and then another six months before I decided to actually start using it. I'm actually disappointed that I could have been earning badges the whole time. FML.

Gixie's page activity

Visits<b>hannahmae1357</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 4:50pm<b>rrrrrrrrrrrrrrr</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 9:05pm<b>poppypoptarts</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 4:29pm<b>Silly_Lilly6969</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 10:40am<b>boricualuv</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 10:35pm<b>TyChief</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 6:15pm<b>castleofg1ass</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 3:58am<b>Fou_Lou</b> - the 05/23/2014 at 11:16am<b>rabbi1010</b> - the 04/30/2014 at 10:06am<b>SilaOtlu</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 9:07am<b>jefsayed</b> - the 03/22/2014 at 4:13pm<b>Birdbath123</b> - the 02/14/2014 at 12:10am<b>koalabear_55</b> - the 01/27/2014 at 6:25pm<b>Esels_Hintern</b> - the 01/17/2014 at 6:45pm<b>that_spaz</b> - the 01/16/2014 at 2:13am<b>jahed100</b> - the 01/15/2014 at 2:57pm<b>UnknownDemon1406</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 1:40am<b>minutepoet</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 10:30pm

Gixie's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of Gixie's badges

Gixie's favorite FMLs

Today, I climbed into bed with my sleeping boyfriend after a long shift at work. He immediately rolled over, clamped my leg between his knees, and started viciously humping it. This is the fourth time now, and he still doesn't believe that he even does it. FML

#21154464
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46655) - you deserved it (5596)

On 05/28/2014 at 10:21am - love - by needanotherbed - United Kingdom (Suffolk)

Today, I collected my students' final essays. One of them submitted a printout of a screenshot he took with his phone. Too bad a browser address bar was still in the shot, along with a "click to read more" link at the bottom. My students are too dumb and lazy to even plagiarize properly. FML

#21148317
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42836) - you deserved it (4439)

On 05/22/2014 at 12:47pm - work - by What am I doing with my life? - United States (Colorado)

Today, as a priest's helper in church, I was giving Communion. It took me three people to realize that every time I was giving them the Eucharist, I was saying, "May the force be with you". FML

#21041278
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41417) - you deserved it (12492)

On 01/26/2014 at 11:37pm - work - by sabz21 - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my son was playing The Sims, when I saw him remove the door to a room and set it on fire with a Sim trapped inside. I chuckled at first, until I saw that the Sim was me. Meanwhile, my wife's Sim was happily painting in the next room, not giving a crap. All too accurate, sadly. FML

#21015673
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46136) - you deserved it (4957)

On 01/03/2014 at 4:50pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, when I am asked to do something and I don't do it immediately, my mother threatens to "twerk" in front of my friends. FML

#21014763
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42890) - you deserved it (8410)

On 01/02/2014 at 9:52pm - misc - by FMLPLZ (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via a sign he made in front of my Minecraft house. FML

#21000308
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44163) - you deserved it (5839)

On 12/21/2013 at 3:05pm - misc - by back to creepers (woman) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, I learned I was conceived to the sounds of a Spice Girls album. FML

#20954288
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34631) - you deserved it (3802)

On 11/11/2013 at 6:58pm - misc - by queenxalee (woman) - United States (California)

Today, she did it again. While I was minding my own business reading the paper, she casually walked up to me and slashed my face with her nails, drawing blood and screams of pain. I need to get out of this abusive relationship, but no one will adopt my asshole of a cat. FML

#20950555
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42806) - you deserved it (7980)

On 11/08/2013 at 6:02pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was in my room playing with my pet. I told my snake, "Who needs friends when I have you?" Through the wall I heard my neighbors say, "You do." I've never met my neighbors. FML

#20949324
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39389) - you deserved it (8000)

On 11/07/2013 at 6:08pm - misc - by Where is the faith in Humanity - United States (Washington)

Today, at work, I had to explain to my co-manager at work what a period was, after he refused to let an employee go change her tampon. Afterwards, he panicked, saying he thought women made that up so they didn't have to have sex, before trying to send her to the hospital and fainting. We're 24. FML

#20944786
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62080) - you deserved it (4046)

On 11/04/2013 at 12:45am - intimacy - by TheTruthofWomen (woman) - United States

Today, while working customer service, I instructed a customer to press the pound key on her cellphone. She hesitated a moment before asking, "Um, the pound key? You mean the hashtag, right?" FML

#20941322
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41860) - you deserved it (3884)

On 11/01/2013 at 12:49pm - work - by #isthisthepoundkey? - United States (Florida)

Today, I was wearing a letterman jacket that had my school name and "Okinawa Japan" on the back. A high school kid walks up to me and says, "I can't forgive you people for bombing Pearl Harbor." I'm black. FML

#20938215
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41942) - you deserved it (3688)

On 10/29/2013 at 6:31pm - misc - by The_FN_Gunny - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my boyfriend accused me of cheating because according to him, our child does not have his hair color, eye color, or other facial features. Our son is five days old, bald and hasn't opened his eyes much. The closest thing I can probably compare him to is an old, wrinkly potato. FML

#20912171
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53596) - you deserved it (4225)

On 10/08/2013 at 5:55am - kids - by thisguy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my 15-year-old daughter said she wanted to become a "baby name expert". I chortled, until I looked it up. They actually exist. FML

#20896486
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33993) - you deserved it (4675)

On 09/26/2013 at 3:06am - kids - by anotherfmladdict (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, as I was getting my nails done at a salon, the owner pulled my head back against the chair in front of all the customers and began to tweeze my eyebrows. When I exclaimed that I didn't pay for that service, she replied, "I don't care. This needs done." FML

#20882967
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39972) - you deserved it (11361)

On 09/15/2013 at 9:21pm - misc - by BaMiTsAnYa (woman) - United States (Florida)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

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FML's blog

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  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

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