GayMatt

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Offline (the 06/17/2014 at 8:42pm)

GayMatt

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 5 December 1986 (29 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2801
  • Number of comments : 37
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About GayMatt : Just a guy from norway that cant go a day without a few fmls during the day! Personal messages now eh. that could get interesting :F (so far loving it!, send away!)

GayMatt's page activity

Visits<b>Remembered</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 5:14am<b>Dchag117</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 12:30am<b>Sp1k3FML</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 12:44am<b>MARGIE9</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 11:09pm<b>colerean</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 1:06am<b>omgbrainZ</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 11:56am<b>El_Jefe99</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 4:07am<b>kat_moore15</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 8:17pm<b>augiedd</b> - the 03/31/2014 at 5:35pm<b>lexypaige</b> - the 02/17/2014 at 8:11pm<b>bmerlucci</b> - the 02/04/2014 at 1:05am<b>VentiAnemoi</b> - the 02/03/2014 at 9:58pm<b>vegasked</b> - the 02/03/2014 at 8:45pm<b>JustABadKid_</b> - the 02/03/2014 at 7:32pm<b>Tempted1</b> - the 02/03/2014 at 7:11pm<b>deniseeeee_15</b> - the 02/03/2014 at 6:33pm<b>niatross</b> - the 01/27/2014 at 3:25pm<b>inteli3</b> - the 01/19/2014 at 12:56pm

GayMatt's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of GayMatt's badges

GayMatt's favorite FMLs

Today, during dinner, my daughter rudely cut into my conversation and gushed that she's "like, totally" going to audition for a reality TV show next year, after I pay her way. Five minutes into her jaw-dropping stupidity, I had to physically restrain myself from slapping her out of her chair. FML

by Anonymous / 10/26/2012 at 8:33pm / United Kingdom (Solihull) / Kids

Today, my dad was teaching me how to drive. He told me that stop signs with white outlines are "optional." I ran through the next one I saw and got pulled over by a cop. My dad is making me pay the ticket for being "that stupid." Thanks dad. FML

by Dinger1992 / 10/23/2012 at 9:19am / United States / Money

Today, I woke up naked next to my gay roommate after a night of drinking. Neither he nor I remember anything. FML

by holyshitbatman / 09/22/2012 at 10:06am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, my soon-to-be stepson, 13, decided that he and I needed to spend "more quality time" together. His idea? We should start "bonding" by taking a bath together. When I said no, he told me I was being unfair, and that if I really loved him, I'd do it. FML

by Anonymous / 08/03/2012 at 4:21am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I was sitting under a rather large house plant in my dining room, minding my own business when a spider lowered itself right in front of my face. It startled me, causing me to gasp, which resulted in me inhaling the spider. I then spent 3 minutes choking on it. FML

by danonno / 08/02/2012 at 5:08pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was getting coffee with my aunt, and she asked me to pay. She then turned to the Barista and said, "He's never had a girlfriend before, and I wanted to show him that they take your money." The Barista laughed so hard she had to excuse herself. FML

by brannonjames / 05/10/2012 at 6:20pm / United States / Love

Today, I realized that both my husband and son refer to me as "the bitch." FML

by stoggie96 / 04/22/2012 at 11:34am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I have been awake so long I hallucinated a llama in my living room. I have a medical condition that keeps me from sleeping properly. I've run out of medication. I still see the llama. FML

by SeeingLlamas / 04/17/2012 at 5:38am / United States (Tennessee) / Health

Today, a guy asked me why I'm single. As a joke, I told him that not only do I have a penis, but that it's so large that most men are intimidated by it. He wasn't impressed. And I actually wonder why I'm single. FML

by joolsie / 04/13/2012 at 9:11am / United Kingdom (York) / Intimacy

Today, the subject of penis size came up while my boyfriend and I were chatting. He asked if he was big, and I replied that whatever size he was, he was enough to satisfy me. Apparently, that was the wrong answer, and he spent the rest of the night sulking because I didn't say he was enormous. FML

by tellingthetruth / 03/21/2012 at 12:25pm / United Kingdom (Warwickshire) / Intimacy

Today, I spent the day crying, and ate McDonald's for my Christmas dinner. FML

by Holly Jolly / 12/26/2011 at 1:33am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finished a very important but annoying presentation that took four hours to complete. Only after writing a paragraph to explain the presentation and sending it to my boss did I realize that I saved the document as "Shit I have to do to get a promotion." FML

by TTR / 11/12/2011 at 7:36pm / United States (Illinois) / Work

Today, I was at work when I found an iPhone on the floor. I decided not to turn it into the manager and keep it. Five minutes later, a customer asked if anyone had turned in her missing phone. I said no and began to walk away, when her friend called her phone. It rang. She recognized the ringtone. FML

by charlie3289 / 10/27/2011 at 1:01am / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I was using the toilet and decided to check out some FMLs. One made me laugh out loud as my room-mate was passing by the bathroom. He now tells everyone my penis is so small it makes even me laugh every time I see it. FML

by Anonymous / 10/06/2011 at 12:17pm / Canada / Intimacy

Today, my house got broken into. Thankfully they didn't steal anything. They did, however, move things around into strange places and mess up my underwear. I have severe OCD, so this is probably worse than if they had taken everything. FML

by WTFwhywouldyoudothat / 08/22/2011 at 6:10pm / United Kingdom (Rotherham) / Miscellaneous