Fyrus

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Fyrus

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4131
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Fyrus's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:11pm<b>Puolukka</b> - the 07/24/2009 at 3:22pm

Fyrus's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Fyrus's favorite FMLs

Today, I was walking down the street, when a man behind me tapped me on the shoulder. He gave a $5 bill and said that he thought I had dropped it. Not having the integrity to turn him down, I took it. I spent the next 20 minutes being chased by a crazy hobo who claimed that it was his. FML

by pinkrazrgirl247 / 07/03/2009 at 2:29am / United States / Love

Today, I was chatting with an amazing guy online. He was perfect for me. After five hours he told me he loved me and I said it back. So than we decided to trade nudes. I sent mine. Within two seconds my niece calls, laughing her ass off, telling me how weird my birthmark is. FML

by Uriah / 07/03/2009 at 12:20am / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband's rich aunt and uncle came in town and handed us an envelope and said we hope this helps out with the student loans. Inside the envelope was just an article on new student loan procedures and how to get lower payments. FML

by kbrider / 07/02/2009 at 4:37pm / United States (Illinois) / Money

Today, I had to take a leak, so I went into a porta-john. I noticed another man's hand under the door with a cell phone. Angered, I aimed my stream at his hand and phone. He tilted the porta-john over in response. It was full. FML

by S4L / 07/02/2009 at 12:13am / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend was on the roof of his house. I climbed the ladder but I am kind of scared of heights so when I got up there I just sat on the edge. The gutter broke and fell down and I fell along with it. My boyfriend said, "I've been trying to tell you to go on a diet". FML

by sydsophnova / 07/01/2009 at 11:36pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I took a bike ride to enjoy the weather and stopped for a break on the sidewalk of an overpass, taking in the view of the beautiful hills. I was approached by a cop, who said to me: "Ma'am, I know your life is crap right now, but I'm sure it'll get better. Please don't jump." FML

by Liz / 07/01/2009 at 1:41pm / United States (New York) / Transportation

Today, I finally hooked up with the boy of my dreams at a party. Later, while on aim, I noticed one of his friends away messages was a quote from the guy's screen name, which said "I can't believe what I stick my d... In sometimes." FML

by Bulldogs09 / 07/01/2009 at 12:41am / Love

Today, I realized that a Ph.D. in Mechanical Engineering does not offer enough knowledge and experience to accomplish some simple, everyday tasks. I have spent the last 12 years designing large robots to scour the seabed for shipwrecks yet the mechanism used to unhook a bra eludes me. FML

by Anonymous / 06/30/2009 at 10:39pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, I went to work leaving my girlfriend asleep in my bed. Later she calls me demanding to know how long I've been cheating on her. We don't use condoms but she found several in the bin when she decided to empty it. I had to explain while my colleagues listened that I use them to masturbate. FML

by SimpleSimon / 06/30/2009 at 8:14pm / United Kingdom (Herefordshire) / Intimacy

Today, I called the police regarding people speeding down my street because I was worried for my young kids. On the way home from my daughters ballet class I got pulled over 2 houses away from my house and got a $150 speeding ticket. FML

by Anonymous / 06/30/2009 at 4:15pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Transportation

Today, I called the police regarding people speeding down my street because I was worried for my young kids. On the way home from my daughters ballet class I got pulled over 2 houses away from my house and got a $150 speeding ticket. FML

by Anonymous / 06/30/2009 at 4:15pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Transportation

Today, I saw a drunk guy hitting on a girl sitting alone at the bar. She insisted that her boyfriend was there, but he didn't relent. So I went over and put my arm around her and asked "Who's this guy?" He walked away, but then I felt a tap on my shoulder. It was her boyfriend. He broke my arm. FML

by Anonymous / 06/30/2009 at 2:57pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend throwing my birth control box at me and shouting that I was a slut for cheating on him since we never had sex. I attempted to explain the birth control was for a condition I have that causes my period to be non-existent. He didn't believe me. FML

by Anonymous / 06/30/2009 at 10:45am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I got beaten up by my ex-girlfriend's older brother who does mixed martial arts, because my ex saw me making out with another girl. We broke up over 6 months ago. FML

by thatCanadianGuy7 / 06/29/2009 at 3:55pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. I opened my eyes to see his eyes fixed on something else. I turned my head to see what was so interesting. He was on his iPhone looking up recipes for things to wrap in bacon. FML

by a_B_c_D_e_F_g / 06/27/2009 at 10:29am / United States (Michigan) / Love