About FukeT_ : suck it -.-
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An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Today, the police arrived at my door, telling me my child had been caught vandalizing. A boy who looked about 15 hugged me and said, "Hey, mum". I'm only 26 years old and had never seen this boy in my life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31438) - you deserved it (1963)
On 01/22/2013 at 6:16pm - kids - by Female (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, my husband asked me to show him my boob. I began to pull the side of my shirt down when he said, "No, not that one, the big one." FML
I agree, your life sucks (32041) - you deserved it (2794)
On 01/21/2013 at 9:27pm - intimacy - by sarah6786 (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I found a lost dog and called the owner. When he arrived, I thought it would be cute to put the dog down so he would run back into his owner's arms, like in movies. As soon as I put the dog down, it ran away again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14996) - you deserved it (27270)
On 01/20/2013 at 11:34am - animals - by DrakeB (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I found out that my home-made pasta sauce had a weird taste to it because my basil patch in the backyard has become my dog's preferred spot to pee. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25641) - you deserved it (4967)
On 01/19/2013 at 2:40am - animals - by damnthedog (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I grabbed his butt to control his thrusts and got a clump of used toilet paper. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47719) - you deserved it (4453)
On 01/18/2013 at 5:50am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, while moving into my new place, I saw my new, elderly neighbor sitting on her porch. I cheerfully greeted her with, "Hello, how are you?" She simply rocked slowly in her chair and replied, "Just waiting to die." She was the most cheerful person I met all day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24433) - you deserved it (1507)
On 01/16/2013 at 6:22pm - misc - by Kallian - United States
Today, my girlfriend came back from visiting her family. She'd forgotten to take her pills, and decided to "catch up" by taking almost a week's worth of birth control and prescription pills. She's fine, but I had to convince the ER staff that she's not suicidal, just stupid. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33533) - you deserved it (2883)
On 01/16/2013 at 1:26pm - health - by SF49 - United States
I agree, your life sucks (33595) - you deserved it (6516)
On 01/14/2013 at 12:58pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was asked out by a friend of mine. He's a doctor and works at a prestigious hospital, so thinking we would eat somewhere special, I got all dressed up. We ended up eating at his hospital's cafeteria, because he gets a small employee discount. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25481) - you deserved it (5130)
On 01/11/2013 at 2:37pm - love - by wowthanks (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I took my child to the park. Having been there an hour, another mum came up to me and we started talking. She then told me that one kid had been harassing her children, pointing to my child. When she asked which one was mine I pointed to a random kid. It was hers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12224) - you deserved it (32640)
Today, my mom bitched me out and threatened to send me to a Bible camp, after catching me admiring a photo of a bikini model, which is apparently "immoral behavior." This is the same woman who cheated on my dad twice, justifying it by claiming the devil tempted her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28121) - you deserved it (1480)
On 12/07/2012 at 12:06pm - misc - by sonofahypocriticalwhore (man) - United States
Today, I was working the dart game at my local amusement park when a couple paid to play. They were highly intoxicated, and they thought the object of the game was to hit me with the darts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16855) - you deserved it (1296)
On 11/28/2012 at 10:14am - work - by hawksbc (woman) - United States (Iowa)
Today, I noticed a rather small man being harassed by a rather large man, so I tried to help out and break it up. The small guy punched me in the face and said, "Mind your business!" The large guy laughed and fist-bumped him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13261) - you deserved it (3130)
On 10/29/2012 at 3:55am - misc - by Nice Guy (man) - United States (California)
Today, my mom called me from jail. She was arrested for having sex in public. I was with my dad when I got the call. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37505) - you deserved it (1576)
On 10/27/2012 at 11:02am - intimacy - by Monkey (man) - United States
Today, my husband and I decided to tell our sixteen-year-old daughter that she's adopted. Her response was, "Thank God!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (19148) - you deserved it (4387)
On 10/19/2012 at 3:59am - kids - by best_mom_ever (woman) - United States (Tennessee)
Monday 20 May 2013
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