French_Toast

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French_Toast

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 849
  • Number of comments : 54
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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French_Toast's page activity

Visits<b>Bootybot47</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 7:10pm<b>duffy069</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 8:42am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 11:27pm<b>mommamia178</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 9:14pm<b>Raptor73242</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 10:16am<b>TheMrJoee</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 8:43pm<b>guskta</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 12:19pm<b>curticus</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 4:01pm<b>OnlyAvailableID</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 8:44pm<b>jacknapes2000</b> - the 04/02/2014 at 9:44am<b>Suisei</b> - the 03/28/2014 at 3:56pm<b>RockingRocker</b> - the 02/11/2014 at 3:32pm<b>hunteryager</b> - the 09/17/2013 at 3:45pm<b>brisbanegirl</b> - the 06/19/2013 at 4:30pm<b>max367</b> - the 05/01/2013 at 1:34am<b>ashleyek</b> - the 01/29/2013 at 3:44pm<b>trismagestus</b> - the 08/13/2012 at 7:18pm<b>False_Stupidity</b> - the 08/09/2012 at 1:09am

French_Toast's FML badges

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

French_Toast's favorite FMLs

Today, I cleaned the toilet so vigorously that I snapped the handle of the brush. I laughed and told the rest of my family. Instead of joining in on the hilarity, my mother screamed, "We have had that toilet brush for twenty-six years!" FML

by SLAB_GIRL15 / 08/01/2012 at 3:59am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I'm sitting in the ER with my eight-year-old son. He broke his arm after jumping out through the second story window. He was too impatient to walk to the ice cream van pulling up outside. FML

by Marjorie / 07/13/2012 at 1:08pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I finally went to the DMV to replace my lost license. After waiting for almost two hours, I casually rummaged through my purse. Something strange inside the lining caught my eye. It was my license. FML

by HellisLikeTheDMV / 07/13/2012 at 11:19am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, my wife, who is four months pregnant, burst into tears while thinking about the armchair in our living room that we never use. According to her, we're stopping it from living out its destiny as an armchair. FML

by FauteuilEver Alone / 07/05/2012 at 4:11am / France / Miscellaneous

Today, it was my boyfriend's grandfather's funeral and visitation. These things make me nervous, and not thinking, I made comments that included the words "killing", "dying", and "death". I'm a rubbish support system. FML

by Anonymous / 06/24/2012 at 7:38am / Italy / Miscellaneous

Today, I quit smoking. My son came home with an ashtray he made in arts and crafts class. FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2012 at 8:21am / United States / Kids

Today, I took my kids to the mall to see Santa. While waiting in line, my eldest got bored and loudly complained, "I don't know why we're here. Santa's not even real." I don't think any of the kids within a hundred feet took the news very well. FML

by santashelper / 12/05/2011 at 6:32pm / United States / Kids

Today, my mom learned how to use the text messaging on her smartphone. I've received 37 already, and she calls after every single one to make sure I understood her. FML

by Anonymous / 11/02/2011 at 11:15am / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I approached my daughter and told her she needs to clean her room. Her response was, "Thank you Captain Obvious." She's 4. FML

by kidswithnomanners / 09/05/2011 at 1:04pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I gave my husband an ultimatum: either he could have sex with me or play Minecraft. Needless to say, he spent the rest of the evening playing Minecraft. FML

by minecraftwilldie / 06/02/2011 at 12:52pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm / United Kingdom (Wiltshire) / Geek

Today, at work, I was asked to sharpen some pencils. I'm an electronics and mechanics engineer, and while I understand it's been quite a while since I was in primary school, I still wonder why my boss felt the need to explain in minute detail how to sharpen a pencil. FML

by dibman / 01/07/2011 at 4:11am / United Kingdom (Hampshire) / Work

Today, I went to Disneyworld. I fell and hit my head while jumping up and down to see Ariel. I'm a 35 year old man. FML

by disney / 11/26/2009 at 11:30am / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, I rang British Gas to cancel my boiler cover, as I'm totally and utterly skint. I told her the reason was I was getting divorced, moving house, losing my job and had no income at all. She was very sympathetic, and said "how would you like to pay your £37 cancellation fee?" FML

by shellbom / 11/17/2009 at 4:33pm / United Kingdom (Northamptonshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to my 7 year old son's school for a conference with his teacher. When I got there, the teacher said "she adored me for who and what I am". I was puzzled. Turns out my son told his class that I am a "lesbian American." Wrong. I'm Lebanese-American. FML

by lebanesewoman / 06/30/2009 at 12:17pm / Hong Kong / Kids