FirstTigerHobbes

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FirstTigerHobbes

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 25 June 1989 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 1829
  • Number of comments : 176
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About FirstTigerHobbes : All hail the club of G.R.OS.S.

FirstTigerHobbes's page activity

Visits<b>Sansational_</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 10:49am<b>unsealingkale</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 12:32am<b>princeofgirl</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 8:23pm<b>GetRektBro</b> - the 09/25/2015 at 7:52pm<b>jarlballin</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 4:48pm<b>swmmrrnr</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 8:49am<b>fallenshadow16</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 1:43am<b>KinkyMissBinky</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 1:13am<b>clairesucks</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 10:51am<b>predator0309</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 10:41pm<b>Tbear11</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 5:08am<b>itzypedia</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 12:10am<b>Aadavis94</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 8:35pm<b>wolfgold2</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 1:45am<b>mip_92</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 9:41pm<b>Bombegranite</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 12:26pm<b>Fuaaad1994</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 1:05pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 10:07am

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FirstTigerHobbes's favorite FMLs

Today, I got home from my 6-week vacation. Apparently, my mum cleaned my room for me while I was gone because my vibrator was neatly tucked into my blanket, next to my pillow instead of being hidden under my bed. FML

by Anonymous / 01/21/2012 at 5:45am / Russian Federation / Intimacy

Today, I anxiously waited 8 hours for an important phone call. The phone rang while I was sitting on the toilet. FML

by iliterallypoopedmyself / 01/18/2012 at 8:54pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Work

Today, I turned on the news to see a live report about an increase in crime in my town. One minute in, my drunk daughter appears behind the news reporter, butt naked, dancing. FML

by MakesMeLol / 01/18/2012 at 5:30pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Miscellaneous

Today, out of habit, I said "See you later" to a creepy old male customer who stared at my chest the whole time I was serving him. His response was to wink and say, "Oh, you will." FML

by terrified / 01/18/2012 at 2:02pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend referred to his penis as 'The Eye of Sauron'. It didn't help when he pulled down his foreskin, pointed it in my direction and said 'I see you'. FML

by anon / 01/18/2012 at 1:29pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, I hosted a "Night Out Against Crime" party at our local park. Only three people came, they robbed our fundraiser booth. FML

by no money anymore / 01/17/2012 at 10:31pm / United States / Money

Today, I learned how awful intertrigo smells. I spent a ton of money and years of my life to become a health care provider apparently to treat the yeast infection between an obese woman's fat folds. FML

by Sheliton / 01/17/2012 at 8:39pm / United States / Work

Today, I started my new job as a dishwasher, and was very excited since I've been broke for weeks. A few people dined and dashed, apparently for the first time in the restaurant's history. My boss is superstitious. She fired me. FML

by broke / 01/17/2012 at 11:08am / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I put on a pair of sneakers that I'd left outside, and went jogging. After several minutes of pain, I pulled off one of the sneakers, only to find dozens of baby spiders had moved in. FML

by moorox45 / 01/16/2012 at 12:10pm / United States (New Jersey) / Animals

Today, I went to see one of my favorite bands. When they started playing my favorite song I whipped out my video camera and sang along. As I was reviewing the video later, I realized that I couldn't even hear the band over my horrible singing. FML

by CA19oo / 01/15/2012 at 10:08pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to slowly explain to my daughter why her Facebook profile isn't a valid piece of ID. FML

by Ange / 01/15/2012 at 2:34pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Kids

Today, I introduced my boyfriend of two weeks to my parents. My dad asked me to leave the room so they could have some "guy talk". I eavesdropped, only to hear the words "sex-crazed fuck" and a threat to stick bamboo shoots under my boyfriend's fingernails if he ever hurt me. FML

by soontobedumped / 01/15/2012 at 2:26pm / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, my girlfriend hummed the Jeopardy theme while I was trying to undo her bra. FML

by joeshmoe / 01/15/2012 at 7:52am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I realized why buying clear pins for the wall is a bad idea. If one falls out, you won't be able to see it with your eyes, but your foot will find it just fine. I also learnt foot wounds can produce a pretty significant geyser of blood. FML

by footbloodfountain / 01/15/2012 at 5:53am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I took my car to a drive-through car wash. It wasn't until after my back seat was filled with foam and I had been squirted in the face that I realized my back seat window was rolled down. FML

by Anonymous / 01/15/2012 at 4:44am / United States (Oklahoma) / Transportation