Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Fire_lights

Search for a member

Fire_lights

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 8216
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Fire_lights's page activity

Visits<b>BicBoi996</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 5:49pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 1:46pm<b>KoGWitness</b> - the 05/30/2013 at 9:32pm<b>22jrdn55</b> - the 10/12/2009 at 4:03pm<b>just_one_more</b> - the 08/30/2009 at 3:31pm<b>prplr</b> - the 08/24/2009 at 5:05pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 08/24/2009 at 4:16pm<b>kayla_f_babyyy</b> - the 08/24/2009 at 2:30pm<b>marcogiovino</b> - the 08/10/2009 at 2:24pm<b>colormefancy</b> - the 07/18/2009 at 10:53pm

Fire_lights's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Fire_lights's favorite FMLs

Today, I was playing catch with my 6 year old cousin in the garden, when he demanded a piggy back. Trying to be the good cousin, I did so and he soon shouts "Run! Run!" so I do so. Suddenly he shouts "STOP! My winky's gone pointy". I gave my 6 year old cousin an erection. FML

#4637795
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56580) - you deserved it (4703)

On 08/18/2009 at 8:23pm - intimacy - by Girl - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. After about 10 minutes, when we change positions, he shouts: "Power Rangers - Transform!" FML

#4636801
258 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56961) - you deserved it (11369)

On 08/18/2009 at 7:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was at my school's spaghetti dinner with my family. My brother shook up my mom's soda, as a prank. My entire class witnessed my mom waving around an overflowing Diet Coke while my dad yelled, "Come on, put your mouth on it! Suck it! Suck it, Kathy!" FML

#4630669
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (116113) - you deserved it (8809)

On 08/18/2009 at 3:20pm - misc - by gbhlaughingstock (man) - United States

Today, I lost a bet with my girlfriend. I now have to wear a shirt saying "Worlds Smallest Penis" everywhere I go for a month. FML

#4627317
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18553) - you deserved it (61786)

On 08/18/2009 at 12:34pm - love - by badtimingdude (man) - Mauritius

Today, I lost a bet with my girlfriend. I now have to wear a shirt saying "Worlds Smallest Penis" everywhere I go for a month. FML

#4627317
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18553) - you deserved it (61786)

On 08/18/2009 at 12:34pm - love - by badtimingdude (man) - Mauritius

Today, I asked a woman where her beautiful accent was from. The woman stared at me for a while. Then her daughter told me that the reason her mother talked like that was because she had a stroke a few months ago. FML

#4627315
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47816) - you deserved it (9405)

On 08/18/2009 at 12:33pm - misc - by anonymus (man) - United States

Today, I slept in late and when I woke up, thought I was the only one in the house so I decided to walk around the corner to the only upstairs bathroom naked. My dad also slept in, also thought he was the only one in the house, and also decided to walk to the bathroom naked. We collided. FML

#4596913
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60677) - you deserved it (13286)

On 08/17/2009 at 9:50am - misc - by malebonding (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was home alone and I started to sing Halo by Beyonce. I was starting to get into it and began singing with more passion until the phone rang. It was my neighbor begging me to please shut the hell up. FML

#4582506
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14388) - you deserved it (38212)

On 08/16/2009 at 9:00pm - misc - by Ricky (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I finished writing the most perfect love letter for this girl at summer school. At the end of the letter I signed: Your secret admirer. Cute, right? Not really. Turns out I was so anxious to finish the letter that I ended up writing my name at the bottom. FML

#4563913
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10584) - you deserved it (48523)

On 08/16/2009 at 1:17am - love - by footyfallout (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, while I was watching Miley Cyrus' new music video, I had an itch near my bikini line that I couldn't reach through my jeans. So I unzipped my pants to get to it, and that's when my boyfriend walked in on me with my hands down my pants. He thought I was getting off on the music video. FML

#4555175
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43901) - you deserved it (21041)

On 08/15/2009 at 7:24pm - intimacy - by notguilty (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while I was watching Miley Cyrus' new music video, I had an itch near my bikini line that I couldn't reach through my jeans. So I unzipped my pants to get to it, and that's when my boyfriend walked in on me with my hands down my pants. He thought I was getting off on the music video. FML

#4555175
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43901) - you deserved it (21041)

On 08/15/2009 at 7:24pm - intimacy - by notguilty (woman) - United States (California)

Today, being a big believer in karma, I found it fitting that a girl that was always a bitch to me in high school is now fat and ugly. After sending one of her recent pictures with a mean caption to a few of my friends, I tripped and sprained my wrist falling up the stairs. Karma. FML

#4550264
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12919) - you deserved it (50350)

On 08/15/2009 at 2:51pm - misc - by whatgoesaround (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I went to the movies alone after the boy I was seeing told me he was busy studying for exams. I found him making out with another girl whilst in the queue. When I confronted him by text he denied that it was him. I saw him check the text and reply. FML

#4545091
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46798) - you deserved it (4303)

On 08/15/2009 at 6:22am - misc - by pink_cupcakes - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I found out that my parents are first cousins. FML

#4539697
321 comments

I agree, your life sucks (124651) - you deserved it (6502)

On 08/15/2009 at 12:33am - misc - by jellybean_94 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while working as a parking booth attendant I decided to be nice and offer a woman free parking. I said, "give me a high five and I'll give you free parking since I already did the paper work." She said, "I'd rather pay," with a really disgusted look. I also had to redo the paper work. FML

#4533518
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39285) - you deserved it (7668)

On 08/14/2009 at 8:19pm - work - by ParkingGuy (man) - United States (Illinois)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: