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FiManson's favorite FMLs
Today, my coworker pointed to our nervous new intern and asked who he was. I jokingly said, "Can't you tell? He's our new slave." I then quickly realized how bad that sounded, given the intern is black. FML
by smooth / 12/30/2014 at 8:39pm / United States / Work
Today, a customer came in with a laptop smashed beyond repair. She asked if we could recover her files, but thanks to my idiot boss' new store policy I had to ask her a bunch of questions, including if she had tried "turning it on and off". She stared at me, speechless, like I was a complete moron. FML
Today, I had to babysit both my neighbor's 3-year-old daughter and my very pregnant cat. I left the room briefly, only to come back to a traumatized 3-year-old crying in horror as my cat gave birth in front of her. FML
by Anonymous / 11/22/2014 at 10:34am / United States (Maine) / Kids
by elsatheannoyed / 11/11/2014 at 11:34pm / United States (California) / Work
by Anonymous / 09/14/2014 at 12:38pm / Ghana (Greater Accra) / Animals
by Amithatevil / 08/29/2014 at 8:35am / Japan (Kanagawa) / Kids
by FANZZY / 08/18/2014 at 12:29pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by Ballsy427 / 07/25/2014 at 8:05am / United States (Armed Forces Pacific) / Work
by Lisa / 07/18/2014 at 4:21pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love
by familyhatesme / 07/18/2014 at 12:30pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
by Is that..? / 07/16/2014 at 11:51pm / United States (Colorado) / Work
Today, I went to a market. I saw stall which had mainly animal furs and things like that. I found a rounded, furry pen and stroked my cheek with it. Wondering what it was, being so soft and oddly shaped, I checked the tag. It was kangaroo testicles. FML
by happypineapple / 07/16/2014 at 11:31pm / Australia (Queensland) / Animals
Today, while out grocery shopping with my mother, she asked me to hold a large bag of rice for her. Ten minutes later, I realized I'd been absent-mindedly stroking it the whole time, just like when I pick up my cat. FML
by Sheh / 07/16/2014 at 11:02am / Sweden / Animals
Today, I went to my bedroom for some alone time while my daughter watched TV. I didn't realize that my iPad was still connected to the Apple TV, until I hit play on some porn and heard a scream from the other room. FML
by ConfusedDad / 12/29/2013 at 2:01am / United States / Kids
by Cian_1 / 11/25/2013 at 6:22am / United Kingdom (Oxfordshire) / Health
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, it's been 2 weeks since I ordered a printer so I could print schoolwork, that way I don't…