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Fence

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Fence

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4519
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About Fence : I'm a kid from Maryland who's really quite boring. I draw stupid comics and play music in an indie-ternative-ska-rap-hardcore-emo-metal band that's going nowhere, and getting there noisily. And..... that's all, really. Yeah.

Fence's page activity

Visits<b>Already_Dead</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 10:17pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 4:48pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 07/27/2010 at 10:08pm

Fence's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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Fence's favorite FMLs

Today, at a family reunion, my visibly drunk grandparents heard about my new boyfriend, who is a cop. My gran asked if he ever made me feel like Rodney King in the bedroom. Then my grandpa, fresh off a DUI, asked if my boyfriend's dick is as bent as the police force. FML

#20727456
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40026) - you deserved it (3703)

On 06/15/2013 at 1:22pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend threw out my old voicemail recorder, thinking it was junk. My father passed away years ago. I kept a recording of the last voicemail he'd left me on it so I'd always remember his voice. FML

#20718168
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (74212) - you deserved it (3683)

On 06/10/2013 at 7:35pm - misc - by Upset (woman) - United States

Today, after years of researching and saving money, I got a pet fox. I was able to enjoy the majesty of the animal for three hours before it burrowed under the fence and ran away. FML

#20717566
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34285) - you deserved it (50354)

On 06/10/2013 at 2:01pm - animals - by SadFoxLady (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined, and I had to stand and watch in morbid fascination as the man behind me kindly paid for my purchase. His reason was "God forbid a maxed out Visa should get in the way of fucking." FML

#20698637
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65648) - you deserved it (18713)

On 06/01/2013 at 1:09am - intimacy - by Samprib (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was walking down the stairs with my guitar in hand, singing "I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing" to my wife. I sang, "I don't wanna close my eyes, I don't wanna fall". Before I could say "asleep", I fell down the stairs. My wife almost pissed her pants laughing. My bum hurts. FML

#20691071
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63282) - you deserved it (14411)

On 05/28/2013 at 12:37pm - love - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my aunt drove to my house and screamed at me for skateboarding in her driveway and denting her car. She then ransacked my room for said skateboard so she could break it in half. My aunt lives 4 hours away. I don't own a skateboard. FML

#20682410
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46933) - you deserved it (2412)

On 05/23/2013 at 7:25pm - misc - by Dalistair (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, the weather was beautiful, so I decided to go out skating. I guess I took a wrong turn into a bad neighborhood, because I ended up being chased several blocks by a group of jacked-up thugs wielding baseball bats and taunting, "Skate or die, homie!" FML

#20673360
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43465) - you deserved it (5872)

On 05/19/2013 at 4:33pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time. I was really excited to introduce her to my parents, until we found my mother waving around a wooden sword, and my father trying to shove my sister into the dryer. FML

#20671220
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45406) - you deserved it (4822)

On 05/18/2013 at 4:06pm - love - by Mr_poole (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I spent hours debating with a lady who claimed she'd spent years "studying the big bang theory". Not only did she not know the scientific meaning of the word "theory", her killer argument was "If the big bang happened, where are the fossils?" I'm not sure whether or not I just got trolled. FML

#20671062
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36154) - you deserved it (4754)

On 05/18/2013 at 2:44pm - misc - by look at the fucking universe, lady (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I attended a cooking class with my co-workers. As the chef prepared to cut up a load of onions for his dish, he warned us to be ready for the "typical reactions". Everyone teared up. Meanwhile, I popped a boner. So much for typical. FML

#20667353
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50313) - you deserved it (8707)

On 05/16/2013 at 4:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my family flew out to surprise my grandma for her 70th birthday. When we arrived, she and my grandpa were both sitting on the couch, high, smoking a joint. FML

#20649343
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49227) - you deserved it (11054)

On 05/08/2013 at 2:59am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I met one of my favorite web-comic artists. As I purchased a shirt from their booth he asked, "What size?" I stupidly asked "How big is a small?" He chuckled, "It's small" and chuckled some more. So much for keeping it cool. FML

#20631829
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32632) - you deserved it (7040)

On 04/29/2013 at 11:32pm - misc - by stupidquestionsstupidpeople - United States (Illinois)

Today, at work at a farm, we got a new calf. It looked like it had to poop, but was having difficulty. About four hours later it still hadn't pooped. Turns out it was born without an actual butthole. It was there, just sealed up by skin. I literally had to cut this poor calf a new butthole. FML

#20617044
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79588) - you deserved it (4089)

On 04/23/2013 at 10:01pm - animals - by halliemarie1818 - United States

Today, at work at a farm, we got a new calf. It looked like it had to poop, but was having difficulty. About four hours later it still hadn't pooped. Turns out it was born without an actual butthole. It was there, just sealed up by skin. I literally had to cut this poor calf a new butthole. FML

#20617044
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79588) - you deserved it (4089)

On 04/23/2013 at 10:01pm - animals - by halliemarie1818 - United States

Today, I discovered why my boss kept on scheduling me to work doubles almost every day. It wasn't because she knew I needed the extra money; she was hoping that my boyfriend would break up with me because I'm never home, and date her instead. It worked. FML

#20615252
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65381) - you deserved it (4211)

On 04/23/2013 at 4:17am - love - by mybossisanass (woman) - United States



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