Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FalaFala

Offline (the 09/23/2014 at 12:18am) | Search for a member

FalaFala

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 12 October 1995 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 709
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About FalaFala : Tits. That is all.

FalaFala's page activity

Visits<b>TYRRELL</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 4:41pm<b>GIGA_IMPACT</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 6:51pm<b>daletris123</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 4:35pm<b>Rori</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 11:09am<b>Digital_Warfare</b> - the 03/08/2014 at 1:26pm<b>MyBabyGuineaPig</b> - the 03/08/2014 at 8:55am<b>pizzaturtles</b> - the 02/09/2014 at 11:49pm<b>lyssaahmarie</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 7:43pm<b>stiansr</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 7:27pm<b>YoshiEgg</b> - the 11/09/2013 at 1:37pm<b>Thursdayxo</b> - the 10/25/2013 at 10:29pm<b>haylburg</b> - the 09/05/2013 at 9:15pm<b>jadeluv</b> - the 09/04/2013 at 9:17pm<b>Ab5traktion_83</b> - the 08/21/2013 at 12:17pm<b>cerrapance</b> - the 08/18/2013 at 11:05am<b>skiddymarker</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 7:53pm<b>kee_breezy32</b> - the 08/08/2013 at 10:07am<b>RandomRobbie13</b> - the 08/06/2013 at 7:57am

FalaFala's FML badges

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of FalaFala's badges

FalaFala's favorite FMLs

Today, I was diagnosed with severe nut allergies. My dad decided to buy jars of Nutella, write "You know you want this" on them, and stick them around the house. FML

#20833620
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47322) - you deserved it (3209)

On 08/12/2013 at 11:24am - health - by nutfreak (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, as I was enjoying a nice fish salad, my father looked me dead in the eyes and said, "Ahh, salmon. The 'other' pink meat", then winked suggestively at my mother. I don't think I can ever eat fish again. FML

#20763590
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58223) - you deserved it (4587)

On 07/04/2013 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by ugh (woman) - South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal)

Today, at the doctor's, I had lots of papers to fill out so my boyfriend offered to help. We submitted them and the doctor called me a few minutes later. Under disorders my boyfriend had written, "Major cock craving disorder." The doctor couldn't stop giggling. FML

#20763013
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58757) - you deserved it (10838)

On 07/04/2013 at 3:03am - intimacy - by Never Going Back To The Doctor (woman) - United States

Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old son covering my nose and mouth with his hand and complaining, "Noooo, you need to die now." FML

#20695159
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62324) - you deserved it (4986)

On 05/30/2013 at 12:29pm - kids - by life insurance for 1 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I spontaneously poured my heart out for my boyfriend, telling him how much I love and adore him. He answered by leaning in close, saying "Jolly good" in an affected accent, and burping loud and clear in my ear. FML

#20455481
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27511) - you deserved it (4563)

On 01/12/2013 at 3:12pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol, City of)

Today, my boyfriend discovered that if he flicks my clitoris just right, my legs both twitch spastically regardless of arousal level. He thinks it's hilarious and can no longer take sex seriously. FML

#20423881
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40524) - you deserved it (4810)

On 12/26/2012 at 4:20pm - intimacy - by geewhy (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm. It was great until mid-gasm when she swung her arm out and knocked me out. She still can't stop laughing. FML

#20418972
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39793) - you deserved it (5760)

On 12/24/2012 at 2:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, because my boyfriend drives a 2-seated sports car, I had to awkwardly sit on his brother's lap as we drove to the store. I soon felt a poking sensation through his pants, just a few minutes before we hit a bumpy road. FML

#20414298
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48634) - you deserved it (6158)

On 12/22/2012 at 5:55pm - intimacy - by orgasmicriding (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, after sharing my first night in bed with my boyfriend, I woke up early, and decided to rouse him with some surprise oral. It didn't go so well; he woke up screaming and gasped, "OH MY GOD! I thought you were my cat!" before telling me to continue. FML

#20412240
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41719) - you deserved it (8166)

On 12/21/2012 at 8:16pm - intimacy - by anonymaiacciu (woman) - France

Today, I was listening to a local radio station, and they did a segment called "food porn." As they were sexually describing various types of food, I actually found myself getting turned on over a pizza. FML

#20411354
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32511) - you deserved it (9105)

On 12/21/2012 at 12:24pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I once again walked in on my husband eating our cat's food. FML

#20409541
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33122) - you deserved it (3931)

On 12/20/2012 at 7:26pm - misc - by jsmills92 (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, at my new job, some juvenile cockbite spiked my food with a laxative, as part of some kind of bizarre hazing ritual. The bastard got ratted out and suspended, but my arsehole now feels like it's been blown apart by a nuclear warhead. I thought this shit only happened in movies. FML

#20409224
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29528) - you deserved it (6154)

On 12/20/2012 at 4:49pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I have a very uncomfortable cyst in my armpit and a sprained ankle both on my right side, resulting in me limping and keeping my arm awkwardly plastered to my side. My fiancé keeps walking like me and calling me Igor, saying "Yes, Master" whenever I ask him for something. FML

#20406767
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29084) - you deserved it (3540)

On 12/19/2012 at 12:16am - health - by Igor (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I told my boyfriend that I'm pregnant. He seemed excited, and said we should make the baby fat so he can bounce her on his lap and watch her double chin jiggle. Just to prove he's serious, he's been searching for high-calorie foods for babies. FML

#20405554
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36248) - you deserved it (5772)

On 12/18/2012 at 12:33pm - kids - by fatbabysyndrome (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I gave a girl answers to a test. She said she would give me something pleasurable in return. She gave me a Twinkie, saying, "I know how much fat people love twinkies." FML

#16207509
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25526) - you deserved it (35020)

On 05/16/2011 at 3:34pm - misc - by pyroman1127 - United States (Utah)



FML's blog

  • Gragrou's illustrated FML
  • One day, cats will rule the world, but not today, there's a bit of tin foil stuck under the couch. The Internet and cats is quite the love story, everybody knows that. A very serious study that was done…

Friday 26 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: