Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Failure_Inc

Search for a member

Failure_Inc

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 13 October 1991 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 728
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Failure_Inc : I love everything about FML!!! I have to say I enjoy this app, the stories, and the people a lot!!! ★★★★★

Failure_Inc's page activity

Visits<b>leahb99</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 4:13pm<b>umidontrember</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 6:50am<b>actuallyahippo</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 10:13am<b>Random_kid0718</b> - the 12/20/2013 at 11:29pm<b>renkar</b> - the 12/19/2013 at 4:59am<b>CheersForRevenge</b> - the 12/18/2013 at 11:27pm<b>JessicaRenee95</b> - the 12/08/2013 at 1:19am<b>Candycake</b> - the 11/20/2013 at 9:15pm<b>mcm_3</b> - the 11/04/2013 at 6:54am<b>w_introuble</b> - the 10/18/2013 at 10:20pm<b>boobsarefun</b> - the 10/14/2013 at 8:17pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 7:29pm<b>hamham1313</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 3:07pm<b>martin8337</b> - the 09/09/2013 at 9:14pm<b>ECraine</b> - the 08/23/2013 at 7:53pm<b>ewang_</b> - the 08/11/2013 at 10:04am<b>pumboc</b> - the 08/07/2013 at 8:13am<b>dinosxxrawr</b> - the 08/06/2013 at 3:46am

Failure_Inc's FML badges

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of Failure_Inc's badges

Failure_Inc's favorite FMLs

Today, we went boating with friends. For some reason the bottom of our tube deflated, causing me to be bounced roughly up and down on the water. As a result, I had the most intense orgasm of my entire life, while sitting 2 inches away from my dad's friend. He definitely noticed. FML

#20862305
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52127) - you deserved it (5374)

On 08/31/2013 at 9:21pm - intimacy - by SplishSplash (woman) - United States

Today, my superior gave me a box of ethernet cables which were previously attached to mainframes storing classified data. He requested I cut them in half so that the residual data would leak out. Not only does this guy make twice my salary, there was no convincing him otherwise. We cut them up. FML

Today, I was crying at my desk at work. My colleague tried to cheer me up by saying: "Don't worry, I'm sure you will find a new job soon". I didn't even know I was fired. I was crying because my cat died this morning. FML

#20807824
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54403) - you deserved it (3618)

On 07/28/2013 at 10:31am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Dalarnas Lan)

Today, my friend set up a profile for me on an adult dating site as a surprise. It was a surprise alright. The picture he set as my avatar was one of me stark naked, which I sent to my ex shortly before he dumped me. FML

#20794134
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35339) - you deserved it (7893)

On 07/20/2013 at 1:43pm - misc - by .............. (woman) - Germany (Saarland)

Today, after discovering that our son is already sexually active, I asked my husband to have a talk with him. "Remember, son, it's all about the clit", wasn't what I had in mind. FML

#20713183
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59867) - you deserved it (13559)

On 06/08/2013 at 6:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. She pulled down my trousers, saw my Poke-ball boxers, and absolutely lost it. I had to lie next to her in bed for the next 10 minutes hearing her howl with laughter while crying "Dickachu, I choose you!" FML

#20711208
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54039) - you deserved it (63259)

On 06/07/2013 at 3:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, the weather was beautiful, so I decided to go out skating. I guess I took a wrong turn into a bad neighborhood, because I ended up being chased several blocks by a group of jacked-up thugs wielding baseball bats and taunting, "Skate or die, homie!" FML

#20673360
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41616) - you deserved it (5663)

On 05/19/2013 at 4:33pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my brother broke his mountain bike, so he stole mine, and managed to break it as well. Then he made some kind of franken-bike out of parts from both, and messed that one up too. FML

#20673285
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39023) - you deserved it (3205)

On 05/19/2013 at 3:56pm - misc - by jfc, how just how (man) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, my wife gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. She's perfect in every way, except for her birth mark. It's under the corner of her left eye and looks almost exactly like a prison teardrop tattoo. FML

#20673142
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45889) - you deserved it (6425)

On 05/19/2013 at 2:33pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was in a big Skype chat, which somehow turned into a heated argument. My friend lost it, typed "your stupid" and called me a "looser." When I pointed out the irony of his messages, he rage-quit, drove all the way to my house, and punched me in the face at the door. FML

#20669389
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48074) - you deserved it (13098)

On 05/17/2013 at 5:16pm - health - by -1 friend (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I walked in on my sister masturbating with my curling iron. FML

#20667250
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71802) - you deserved it (6011)

On 05/16/2013 at 3:49pm - intimacy - by need € for new iron (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, I saw a coin on the ground. As I bent over to pick it up, some dude came up from behind, grabbed my waist and humped me three times. He ran away before I could get a good look at his face. FML

#20664572
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49429) - you deserved it (8668)

On 05/15/2013 at 4:08am - misc - by asdffhhjk (man) - Philippines (Manila)

Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk, except it wasn't really a talk, but rather him making me watch a hardcore porn video with him as he commented on what the actors were doing. I had to listen to all this and ignore his obvious erection for almost an hour. FML

#20660939
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76707) - you deserved it (5241)

On 05/13/2013 at 3:10pm - intimacy - by more than I wanted to know (man) - Italy (Emilia-Romagna)

Today, I walked in on my son trying to carve a bong out of a watermelon. FML

#20656177
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38538) - you deserved it (6764)

On 05/11/2013 at 12:21pm - kids - by What the fuck, son? (man) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, I walked in on my sister apparently trying to eat herself out. FML

#20637584
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67522) - you deserved it (7585)

On 05/02/2013 at 7:54pm - intimacy - by future brain bleach addict (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)



FML's blog

  • Élodie's Illustrated FML
  • Aaaaah, the beach, the sunshine, cool water against our skin...  Nah, just kidding, I can't afford a trip to the beach. This blog is being written from a grotty apartment in the less salubrious parts of…

Friday 18 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: