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Fahrenheit63's FML badges
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Fahrenheit63's favorite FMLs
by inked / 02/05/2012 at 12:54am / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous
by wetdreams / 02/04/2012 at 7:35pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
by Needsanewjob / 01/10/2012 at 10:34am / United States (Arizona) / Work
by kaipodable / 12/21/2011 at 8:41pm / United States (California) / Animals
Today, my husband called me to the bedroom to show me something. This "something" was him demonstrating his seemingly well-trained ability to accurately type out a sentence on my phone using nothing but his erect penis. FML
by anne / 12/16/2011 at 10:46pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by Username / 12/15/2011 at 1:57am / United States (California) / Work
by weswithaute / 11/13/2011 at 1:53am / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids
Today, my 4 year old asked to go outside and play in the sprinkler. I told him not right now because I was busy and he's too little to play outside by himself. I came out of the laundry room later to find he'd brought the sprinkler in the house and turned the water on. At least he listened. FML
by Anonymous / 08/20/2011 at 10:08am / United States / Kids
by Alyssa Charlotte / 07/28/2011 at 10:25pm / Mexico / Transportation
Today, my five year old daughter was watching cartoons on TV. Then a Barbie commercial came on. My daughter sang along with the theme song "Be who you want to be, B-A-R-B-I-E." She then turned to me and said "Mom, I want to be a hooker." FML
by ....... / 06/23/2009 at 1:56pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids
Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML
by RC3Welly / 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
by Noname / 03/06/2009 at 2:04pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy
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- Today, my wife was talking to our 9 month-old baby. “Your father really is an example.” I smiled,… Today, I’m in Sweden. This morning, I went out to get the mail in my pajamas. Well, it doesn’t only… Today, a car almost hit me. Since I wasn’t hurt, the driver chased me with a baseball bat to finish…