FNovus

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FNovus

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 3 September 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 9300
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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FNovus's page activity

Visits<b>MrGodface</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 3:03pm<b>fireburnspeople</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 1:31am<b>partyartie</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 4:09am<b>Zippo90</b> - the 12/27/2009 at 6:25am<b>ILIEKGIRLS</b> - the 12/26/2009 at 2:23am<b>depinaariana</b> - the 11/28/2009 at 5:30pm<b>mylifeisnotfair</b> - the 11/22/2009 at 2:47pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 11/16/2009 at 4:45pm

FNovus's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

FNovus's favorite FMLs

Today, after taking my girlfriend on a date, she invited me back to her place for "hot coffee and dessert". Excitedly, I said yes. When we got there, we actually had coffee and dessert. When I told her this wasn't what I'd had in mind, she kicked me out for being a pervert. FML

by Anonymous / 03/10/2010 at 4:12pm / United States (Connecticut) / Love

Today, my mum decided to teach me a lesson about carelessly leaving my wallet about. She left it on the floor so our puppy could use it and its contents as a chew toy. I was almost impressed to discover that he can eat three £20 notes and still have room for debit cards. FML

by MR / 03/10/2010 at 1:37pm / United Kingdom / Money

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. He suddenly pulls away, and goes, 'OMNOMNOMNOM' then continues kissing me. FML

by anonymous / 03/09/2010 at 1:43am / Australia (Victoria) / Love

Today, after puking all over the bathroom and my legs, I called my husband for sympathy. The first thing he says is "Did you cry?" and when I answered no, instead of wishing me better he quickly exclaimed "WHO'S MY BIG GIRL!" FML

by gotitEVERYWHERE / 03/08/2010 at 5:40pm / United States (Georgia) / Health

Today, my mother-in-law grounded me because I went to the store in the "dangerous" rain. My husband says that if I don't obey then we won't work out. FML

by anonymous / 03/08/2010 at 10:12am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was supposed to talk to my girlfriend's mom to ask permission to date her daughter but I chickened out. We've been together for almost a year, but have not been on a real date because I am too damn scared of her family. FML

by imafrickenidiot / 03/08/2010 at 3:33am / Love

Today, I got on an empty tram and decided to sit at the back. A few minutes in I start to hear a noise and thinking it was the tram, decided to ignore it. When I heard what sounded like an evil giggle, I looked around to see that it wasn't the tram, but it was some creepy middle aged man taking photos of me. FML

by tramrider / 03/07/2010 at 11:29am / United Kingdom (Greater London) / Transportation

Today, I went to Starbucks to use the bathroom. After I knocked on the door, and turned the handle, this little old lady rips the door open and goes "I WAS TAKING A DUMP. YOU WANNA COME IN AND WIPE MY SHIT? DO YOU?!" and then continued to ask me the same question for five minutes. FML

by bathroomblunder / 03/06/2010 at 9:38pm / Canada (Manitoba) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realised that my staff doesn't take me seriously. I walked in on my chef, who had just spent an hour and half a block of cheese carving cheddar goggles for himself. When I confronted him, he pulled up his t-shirt to reveal a cocktail sausage taped to his stomach. FML

by Garry / 03/04/2010 at 7:43am / United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset) / Work

Today, we were working with infant and adult CPR dummies. After practising flawless CPR on the adult dummy, I announced "And that's how you save someone." Then I tripped on the baby dummy and fell. My co-worker stood up and yelled out, "And that's how you kill a baby." FML

by DUMMIE / 03/03/2010 at 7:07pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out my little sister is a pyromaniac. She set my bed on fire. FML

by Anonymous / 03/02/2010 at 4:16pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I learnt that if you accidentally sit on a hamster, instead of dying, it bites your testicles. FML

by ItHurtsLIkeHell / 03/01/2010 at 4:13am / Malaysia (Pulau Pinang) / Animals

Today, I learnt that if you accidentally sit on a hamster, instead of dying, it bites your testicles. FML

by ItHurtsLIkeHell / 03/01/2010 at 4:13am / Malaysia (Pulau Pinang) / Animals

Today, I decided to apply for a credit card to help build up my credit rating. It seemed smart since I'm a 24 year old college graduate. I was rejected for not having a credit history. Being rejected turns out to hurt your credit history. The irony of my predicament is too great for words. FML

by creditwhore / 02/24/2010 at 2:13pm / United States (Missouri) / Money

Today, while I was at my girlfriend's house, I picked up her cat and held him like he was baby Simba. Apparently he didn't enjoy that, because he managed to somehow leap out of my hands and attach himself to my chest, claws extended. I now have four one-inch-long gashes on my chest. FML

by Rafiki / 02/21/2010 at 10:14pm / United States (Missouri) / Animals