Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Eyeliner

Search for a member

Eyeliner

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3191
  • Number of comments : 212
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Eyeliner : I love commercials that go like " I was 250 pounds, and now I'm 120 thanks to this pill! why jog the block everyday, when I can waste my money on a pill that does not work ;D! If you act now we will throw in an extra pill, all this for 200.99 ! It's an awesome deal.

Eyeliner's page activity

Visits<b>deusetnatura</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 9:14am<b>tournamentdecide</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 6:20pm<b>sporkster</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 9:18am<b>RabbidIbanez</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 4:30pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 1:33pm<b>Metagame</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 3:47pm<b>imbackwiththeshi</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 10:03pm<b>Bafrinn</b> - the 03/31/2014 at 3:50pm<b>parism143</b> - the 03/22/2014 at 4:03pm<b>trinalporpus</b> - the 02/19/2014 at 1:08am<b>xAmybbx</b> - the 01/15/2014 at 2:03am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 11:51am<b>kumalo</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 11:15pm<b>CrowntheHorizon</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 6:31am<b>Replicakes</b> - the 09/27/2013 at 9:09am<b>MikeonFML</b> - the 09/21/2013 at 3:11pm<b>Fireashes250</b> - the 08/23/2013 at 7:42pm<b>MGITSWFTC</b> - the 07/28/2013 at 1:29am

Eyeliner's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Eyeliner's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend yelled at me for breathing too much. FML

#18586470
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25945) - you deserved it (4916)

On 12/23/2011 at 3:43am - misc - by cj123 - United States (Arizona)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me using Lady GaGa lyrics. FML

#11723060
386 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60641) - you deserved it (8350)

On 07/07/2010 at 12:40pm - love - by whatheffers (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

#836792
925 comments

I agree, your life sucks (346400) - you deserved it (38545)

On 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by creepermagnet (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I thought I heard my little sister playing on my brand new grand piano. Angry, I ran downstairs to stop her. My parents were having sex. On my piano. FML

#800425
343 comments

I agree, your life sucks (282231) - you deserved it (19064)

On 04/04/2009 at 2:15pm - intimacy - by GuitarChick42 (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I found out that because of my high blood pressure I can't have sex for one month. My wedding is next weekend and the following two weeks are my honey moon. FML

#771915
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (234026) - you deserved it (24498)

On 04/02/2009 at 7:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, it's my 18th birthday. My parents got me a $5 gift certificate to iTunes. It came for free with the iPhone they just bought my sister for her middle school graduation. FML

#580113
484 comments

I agree, your life sucks (590093) - you deserved it (37945)

On 03/24/2009 at 5:15pm - misc - by happybirthday (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was rejected from the University of Washington. My dad has been a professor there for 30 years, and is on the board of admissions. FML

#366764
347 comments

I agree, your life sucks (390069) - you deserved it (89378)

On 03/16/2009 at 12:05am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my first girlfriend of over 3 years left me for another guy. She said she's looking for someone who can financially provide for her in the future. The dude owns a T-Mobile kiosk. I'm going to medical school. FML

#341783
532 comments

I agree, your life sucks (494525) - you deserved it (34005)

On 03/15/2009 at 2:29pm - love - by thankskimi (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I decided to tell my mom about my choice to wait to have sex until after marriage. Coming from a very christian family I thought she would be proud. Instead she laughed and said, "is that your excuse for not being able to get laid?" and walked out of the room. FML

#283028
287 comments

I agree, your life sucks (259822) - you deserved it (47640)

On 03/12/2009 at 1:53pm - intimacy - by sucks - United States

Today, my fiancée broke up with me. Via a myspace message. While we were in the same apartment. FML

#163689
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (330723) - you deserved it (28724)

On 02/28/2009 at 7:22pm - love - by loser (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it. He said, "I don't know what you're talking about, Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML

#159600
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (1142621) - you deserved it (115230)

On 02/28/2009 at 6:10am - love - by thatsucks (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)



FML's blog

  • AD_e's Illustrated FML
  • Hi gang ! It's Friday once more and time for us to go on a magical mystery tour around the brain of yet another illustrator. This week, things have happened around the world that were so depressing, I don't…

Monday 18 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: