Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

EvilPotato

Search for a member

EvilPotato

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 30 May 1981 (33 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 19155
  • Number of comments : 1206
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About EvilPotato : I think it's safe to say I have the largest list of fellow FMLers.


My favorite people on this site are:
Iamnotmyself
DocBastard
Perdix
Flockz
KaySL
Enonymous
Every1luvsboners
Dolphinchedder
IAmScrubs
LiveLaughFML
CryMoreFML's
ImmaB3AST
Freeze
Shrike
StoryOfTheYear
13FTW
Doortje
DrDillIonReese
Keyman1212
Sirin
Alan
Quite_Insane
Me
Me
Did I mention myself? I forget.

My so- so list consists of:
Murdocholmes

My hate list on FML consists of:
Fighterboy11
haw008
araum365 (for extreme amounts of stupidity)

EvilPotato's page activity

Visits<b>ArmyEmma</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 5:34am<b>skiddymarker</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 10:08pm<b>ThunderTheRad</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 9:20pm<b>drayloon</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 1:00pm<b>Karol34</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 7:28pm<b>derp_taco</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 1:47pm<b>FlaminBacon</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 9:47pm<b>tigerisabelle</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 10:45pm<b>Tbear11</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 8:21pm<b>uncle_jimmy</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 12:24pm<b>FaultInMyStars</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 3:49pm<b>MichellinMan</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 10:47am<b>Kyqk</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 8:12am<b>Damafia</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 11:35am<b>justin1205</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 7:08pm<b>Flendre_scarlet</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 6:24am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 10:48pm<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 4:02pm

Liked!<b>derp_taco</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 7:47pm

EvilPotato's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of EvilPotato's badges

EvilPotato's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend did the walk of shame in a skimpy Halloween costume after a night of drunken sex. Problem? The walk ended at my doorstep, and the sex was with a stranger. FML

#20145433
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37268) - you deserved it (2951)

On 11/03/2012 at 6:02am - intimacy - by heartbroke (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my parents. My dad looked at him and said, "Nice outfit, but it's a little late for Halloween." Before I could intervene, my boyfriend said that joke had been done to death, to which my dad retorted, "Yeah, so has your mum." Instant fistfight. FML

#20144826
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28432) - you deserved it (2929)

On 11/02/2012 at 7:50pm - love - by for fuck sake dad (woman) - Ireland (Limerick)

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. I thought it was all going really well, until I looked up a minute or two in, only to be greeted by a stone-cold death glare and the words, "You really are an idiot, aren't you?" FML

#20144510
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31212) - you deserved it (7549)

On 11/02/2012 at 3:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, after losing twenty pounds to please my husband, the only comment I received was, "At least now only your personality sucks." FML

#20143873
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28869) - you deserved it (4538)

On 11/02/2012 at 12:17am - love - by 123alleyesonme - United States (Texas)

Today, dressed in my sexiest nightie, I asked my boyfriend in the most sensual voice possible what he'd like me do to for him tonight. His eyed widened, he started clapping wildly and then shrieked, "SPAGHETTI CARBONARA!" FML

#20142866
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24164) - you deserved it (4299) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 11/01/2012 at 7:48am - love - by Anonymous - France (Picardie)

Today, I was at a barbeque with my family, my boyfriend, and some mutual acquaintances. Someone jokingly called my boyfriend a pussy, to which he loudly replied, "I guess I am what I eat!" My mother was sitting across from us. FML

#20141794
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24385) - you deserved it (3511)

On 10/31/2012 at 4:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, the bar owner I work for told us to pay better attention to our drunk patrons, and to start cutting them off. A fellow bar maid asked how we are supposed to tell when it's time. He pointed at me and said, "When they start hitting on her, they're too drunk to drive." FML

#20141378
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26264) - you deserved it (1855)

On 10/31/2012 at 7:30am - work - by kat (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend surprised me by showing up at my work and proposing to me. It was sweet until an angry customer bitched us out for "wasting her time." FML

#20141262
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24522) - you deserved it (3009)

On 10/31/2012 at 2:18am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my daughter called me telling me she had her twin girls. She named them Juli and Anne. Her name is Julianne. Her kids are going to fucking hate her. FML

#20141194
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30921) - you deserved it (3432)

On 10/31/2012 at 1:01am - kids - by poorkids (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, we got new seats in class today. The guy placed next to me, turned, looked me dead in the eye, and said, "The balls are the warmest place on the body" while his hands were in his pants. I'm stuck next to him for the rest of the semester. FML

#20140711
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20759) - you deserved it (1488)

On 10/30/2012 at 8:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I met someone really cool and their departing words were, for some odd reason, "We should totally be friends, I mean unless you're schizophrenic or something, haha!" I have schizophrenia. FML

#20140639
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25903) - you deserved it (1988)

On 10/30/2012 at 7:42pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I jokingly asked my girlfriend what she got me for my half birthday, to which she replied "A baby." She was serious. FML

Today, my dad watched the news and decided to start preparing for Hurricane Sandy by buying $300 worth of long-life and canned food. We live in Australia. FML

#20138384
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28439) - you deserved it (1835)

On 10/29/2012 at 8:03am - misc - by StormSeason (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend, saying I had a lot on my plate. She responded by throwing an empty plate at my windshield. FML

#20138170
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10094) - you deserved it (24552)

On 10/29/2012 at 1:46am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were preparing for the arrival of Hurricane Sandy. I tasked him with going out to buy emergency groceries in case we lose power. He returned with dozens of microwave cup noodles. We're going to starve. FML

#20137235
283 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23703) - you deserved it (3396)

On 10/28/2012 at 4:14pm - love - by cupnoodles (woman) - United States (New York)



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: