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EverdreamOfMe

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EverdreamOfMe

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 12458
  • Number of comments : 147
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

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EverdreamOfMe's page activity

Visits<b>mylifebejoebear</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 4:08pm<b>kelseysking</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 9:11am<b>thatoneninjadude</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 5:00pm<b>Tezoma</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 12:48pm<b>XSimpleDesignX</b> - the 12/07/2013 at 3:24am<b>only_shreya</b> - the 10/24/2013 at 1:31am<b>mcomedyman94</b> - the 10/03/2013 at 4:04pm<b>Marissanoel</b> - the 10/02/2013 at 3:38pm<b>ashleyylove3</b> - the 10/02/2013 at 2:16am<b>HarleyBlues</b> - the 10/01/2013 at 11:40pm<b>Humor_is_soo_sad</b> - the 09/20/2013 at 2:40pm<b>SlapAndTickle</b> - the 09/10/2013 at 12:25am<b>amelia_suhayda</b> - the 09/09/2013 at 8:31pm<b>Tootsieroll0505</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 4:59pm<b>MzZombicidal</b> - the 07/01/2013 at 6:10pm<b>xoxoloveyouxoxo</b> - the 06/22/2013 at 12:02am<b>dead_insects</b> - the 06/21/2013 at 7:40pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 01/25/2013 at 9:27pm

EverdreamOfMe's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

See all of EverdreamOfMe's badges

EverdreamOfMe's favorite FMLs

Today, a dog bit me on the bus. Instead of apologising, its owner said it was my fault because my hands "must smell of meat". I'm a vegetarian. FML

Today, my family and I were driving and we passed a strip club called DB's Golden Banana. My 5-year-old sister asked what it was, so my dad said it was a place where people dance. Now my sister keeps telling people she wants to be a dancer at DB's Golden Banana. FML

#21432491
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25073) - you deserved it (2589)

On 06/26/2015 at 7:32pm - kids - by tycrist8 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after parking in the handicapped spot of a lot with my placard, an older couple with their 7-year-old grandchild came up and yelled at me for being a lying asshole and taking the parking spot. When I showed them my prosthetic leg, the kid started crying and guess who got yelled at again. FML

#21430208
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29251) - you deserved it (1259)

On 06/22/2015 at 4:46pm - health - by ICanExplain - United States (California)

Today, I brought my best friend home and told my dad we were going to study together. He loudly replied "Woah!", stumbled around for a few seconds like he was drunk, then apologized and said the "sheer amount of gayness" between us had overloaded his gaydar. We're not gay, dammit! FML

#21429349
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25405) - you deserved it (2988)

On 06/21/2015 at 2:04am - misc - by notgay (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, a woman bitched me out at the grocery store, saying that since I'm not Indian, I shouldn't be wearing a bindi - a red dot on my forehead - because it's "cultural appropriation". I was too embarrassed to tell her it was actually a pimple I'd been trying to pop on my forehead. FML

#21428154
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29273) - you deserved it (2500)

On 06/18/2015 at 4:09pm - misc - by unsuccessful popping - United States (New York)

Today, my co-worker told me how "lucky" I am that I "chose" to be a lesbian, because I don't have to deal with "guy drama". I spent two years of my adolescence sleeping at a bus stop and begging strangers for money after I got kicked out of home. FML

#21427509
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34467) - you deserved it (3158)

On 06/17/2015 at 9:31am - misc - by Lesbihonest (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had to wait for my daughter's pet python to finish taking a bath before I could take a shower and go to work. FML

#21425623
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23854) - you deserved it (3376)

On 06/13/2015 at 9:27pm - animals - by patient_mom - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I found out that my homophobic boyfriend, who I was giving a chance to grow the fuck up and get over his obsession with bashing gays, has been cheating on me with another man. FML

#21425403
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37354) - you deserved it (4164)

On 06/13/2015 at 10:26am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, the man who stole my laptop at the train station yesterday used the contact information I had written on it to call me and ask for the password. FML

#21424633
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26867) - you deserved it (1761)

On 06/11/2015 at 6:46pm - misc - by what - United States (California)

Today, my neighbor came over to borrow my lawnmower. As I have previously loaned it to him and he returned it broken, I refused. He then promptly ate the strawberries off my daughter's small strawberry plant and stormed off. FML

#21424116
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25534) - you deserved it (1598)

On 06/10/2015 at 8:13pm - misc - by its still broken (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, an old lady in public transport yelled at me and my dog, called me a liar, and threw her grape soda over me because according to her my pet Shiba Inu was actually a fox, and keeping foxes as pets is illegal. FML

#21422437
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25092) - you deserved it (1421)

On 06/07/2015 at 5:48pm - animals - by foxownerapperantly - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, an old lady in public transport yelled at me and my dog, called me a liar, and threw her grape soda over me because according to her my pet Shiba Inu was actually a fox, and keeping foxes as pets is illegal. FML

#21422437
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25092) - you deserved it (1421)

On 06/07/2015 at 5:48pm - animals - by foxownerapperantly - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, I was riding my newly trained horse. I've recently been suffering from bad gas, and ended up farting so violently, it spooked my horse into bucking me off and running away. FML

#21419654
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23845) - you deserved it (4588)

On 06/02/2015 at 11:23am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, for my birthday, my boyfriend made me a coupon book. I thought it was sweet until I noticed they were all conditional. For example; "Give your boyfriend a blowjob and he'll give you a 10 minute back massage!". They're all like that and he's mad because I refuse to use them. FML

#21417382
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28524) - you deserved it (2914)

On 05/28/2015 at 11:39pm - intimacy - by shmoooopie (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I called 911 to report a drunk driver. The operator yelled at me for following the guy and told me to get off the phone because I shouldn't be driving with a phone to my ear. FML

#21416830
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26511) - you deserved it (6429)

On 05/27/2015 at 9:28pm - misc - by drivingmecrazy - United States (California)



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