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Erin_VanDerWoods

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Erin_VanDerWoods
  • Town/Country : New York, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 24 December 1995 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 1199
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Erin_VanDerWoods's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me for the first time. He stopped just as I was about to orgasm, and asked if I could finish by myself. Apparently he'd come up with a new algorithm for the Rubik's Cube on my desk and wanted to try it out. FML

#17892959
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30731) - you deserved it (3045)

On 10/03/2011 at 12:38am - intimacy - by Kayt (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was in class and really needed to pee. My teacher has chosen to replace our hall pass with a copy of War and Peace. She picks out a page for us to memorise on the shitter, and repeat by heart later. If we can't remember, we get locked out of class, and then get detention for being absent. FML

#17789217
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26992) - you deserved it (2142)

On 09/20/2011 at 5:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I met an old friend from high school and his hot girlfriend. I jokingly said she must be blind to go out with him. His response: "Yeah, she is." FML

#17728499
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17178) - you deserved it (29941)

On 09/12/2011 at 3:25pm - misc - by aru9 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I realized too late that a picture in my school Powerpoint presentation of thousands of New Zealand sheep, was actually a picture of thousands of naked men in a field. FML

#17709255
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14289) - you deserved it (29838)

On 09/10/2011 at 3:11am - misc - by FullOfNick (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, at work, my boss stared at me from behind while I made hand gestures and noises at a toaster. I was pretending to be Magneto. FML

#17642045
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8102) - you deserved it (27163)

On 09/02/2011 at 3:48am - work - by dragos_dgt (man) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, my girlfriend will only speak to me using Lady Gaga lyrics. FML

#17627394
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30999) - you deserved it (4993)

On 08/31/2011 at 2:31am - love - by ryanlogan - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I visited my son at work. He's an interpreter for the government. As I watched him converse with a group of men, I was overcome with pride. Then the woman next to me said "I can't believe they're talking about that in public." They were discussing masturbation techniques. FML

#17625902
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29444) - you deserved it (3227)

On 08/30/2011 at 11:30pm - intimacy - by mystupidson (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I broke my right leg. I've had one shot of morphine, and even that only relieved the pain a little. It's now totally worn off and I have yet to get pain medication of any kind. My leg has been broken for over nine hours now. FML

#17592683
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24808) - you deserved it (3511)

On 08/27/2011 at 4:12am - health - by Anonymous - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I had an interview for an internship at an independent lawyer's office. Hoping to increase my chances of being hired, I dressed up sexily with a short skirt, high heels, and ample cleavage. Turns out his wife handles the interviews. FML

#17579225
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8322) - you deserved it (90228) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/25/2011 at 5:45pm - love - by santa_maria - Reunion

Today, while going around trying to find a job, a manager came up to ask me, "Are you looking to work here?" I nodded happily, hoping this would be the end of my search. She looked me up and down, saw I had a jacket on to hide my tattoos and said, "Sorry, I can't hire heroin addicts." FML

#17555220
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23960) - you deserved it (8977)

On 08/23/2011 at 2:50am - work - by Protectress (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I burned my tongue. With a flat iron. FML

#17544940
297 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7751) - you deserved it (50081)

On 08/22/2011 at 2:43am - health - by heheheh - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I bought a Halloween costume for my cat. FML

#17544670
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7307) - you deserved it (33919)

On 08/22/2011 at 2:04am - animals - by vishuzzbabe77 - United States

Today, in algebra, I took out my notebook. My Chinese teacher was so impressed with my "Chinese" writings on the cover that I'm now her "favorite student". Those "Chinese" symbols are actually Japanese, but I wanted someone to like me so badly that I didn't correct her. FML

#17530049
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23998) - you deserved it (4814)

On 08/20/2011 at 3:40pm - misc - by Miguel - United States

Today, I found out that instead of being stationed in Afghanistan, my husband of 9 years has been "stationed" at his other girlfriend's house. FML

#17526704
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58430) - you deserved it (3328)

On 08/20/2011 at 3:26am - love - by AlwaysGottaFML - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I took my Catholic girlfriend home to meet my family for the first time. My brother thought it would be civil to spend over an hour insulting her religion and explaining in detail the many ways in which "the Force" is superior. FML

#17521930
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23544) - you deserved it (4646)

On 08/19/2011 at 6:36pm - love - by Jace - United Kingdom (Aberdeen City)



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