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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 24 December 1995 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 3914
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Erin_VanDerWoods's page activity

Visits<b>tVictoria</b> - the 11/11/2015 at 5:19am<b>Malteser95</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 4:58pm<b>InvictusTribuni</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 11:23pm<b>Nathan23xx</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 9:32pm<b>velocityraptor</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 11:21am<b>Elgaard</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 3:11am<b>Christinesayyys</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 12:42pm<b>bigguy087</b> - the 06/24/2012 at 1:13pm

Fucked!<b>Nathan23xx</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 3:32am

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Erin_VanDerWoods's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me for the first time. He stopped just as I was about to orgasm, and asked if I could finish by myself. Apparently he'd come up with a new algorithm for the Rubik's Cube on my desk and wanted to try it out. FML

by Kayt / 10/03/2011 at 12:38am / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, I was in class and really needed to pee. My teacher has chosen to replace our hall pass with a copy of War and Peace. She picks out a page for us to memorise on the shitter, and repeat by heart later. If we can't remember, we get locked out of class, and then get detention for being absent. FML

by Anonymous / 09/20/2011 at 5:25pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I met an old friend from high school and his hot girlfriend. I jokingly said she must be blind to go out with him. His response: "Yeah, she is." FML

by aru9 / 09/12/2011 at 3:25pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized too late that a picture in my school Powerpoint presentation of thousands of New Zealand sheep, was actually a picture of thousands of naked men in a field. FML

by FullOfNick / 09/10/2011 at 3:11am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, at work, my boss stared at me from behind while I made hand gestures and noises at a toaster. I was pretending to be Magneto. FML

by dragos_dgt / 09/02/2011 at 3:48am / Romania (Bucuresti) / Work

Today, my girlfriend will only speak to me using Lady Gaga lyrics. FML

by ryanlogan / 08/31/2011 at 2:31am / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, I visited my son at work. He's an interpreter for the government. As I watched him converse with a group of men, I was overcome with pride. Then the woman next to me said "I can't believe they're talking about that in public." They were discussing masturbation techniques. FML

by mystupidson / 08/30/2011 at 11:30pm / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, I broke my right leg. I've had one shot of morphine, and even that only relieved the pain a little. It's now totally worn off and I have yet to get pain medication of any kind. My leg has been broken for over nine hours now. FML

by Anonymous / 08/27/2011 at 4:12am / United States (West Virginia) / Health

Today, I had an interview for an internship at an independent lawyer's office. Hoping to increase my chances of being hired, I dressed up sexily with a short skirt, high heels, and ample cleavage. Turns out his wife handles the interviews. FML

by santa_maria / 08/25/2011 at 5:45pm / Reunion / Love

Today, while going around trying to find a job, a manager came up to ask me, "Are you looking to work here?" I nodded happily, hoping this would be the end of my search. She looked me up and down, saw I had a jacket on to hide my tattoos and said, "Sorry, I can't hire heroin addicts." FML

by Protectress / 08/23/2011 at 2:50am / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I burned my tongue. With a flat iron. FML

by heheheh / 08/22/2011 at 2:43am / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, I bought a Halloween costume for my cat. FML

by vishuzzbabe77 / 08/22/2011 at 2:04am / United States / Animals

Today, in algebra, I took out my notebook. My Chinese teacher was so impressed with my "Chinese" writings on the cover that I'm now her "favorite student". Those "Chinese" symbols are actually Japanese, but I wanted someone to like me so badly that I didn't correct her. FML

by Miguel / 08/20/2011 at 3:40pm / United States / Geek

Today, I found out that instead of being stationed in Afghanistan, my husband of 9 years has been "stationed" at his other girlfriend's house. FML

by AlwaysGottaFML / 08/20/2011 at 3:26am / United States (North Carolina) / Love

Today, I took my Catholic girlfriend home to meet my family for the first time. My brother thought it would be civil to spend over an hour insulting her religion and explaining in detail the many ways in which "the Force" is superior. FML

by Jace / 08/19/2011 at 6:36pm / United Kingdom (Aberdeen City) / Love