Erin_VanDerWoods

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Erin_VanDerWoods

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 24 December 1995 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 3312
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Erin_VanDerWoods's page activity

Visits<b>tVictoria</b> - the 11/11/2015 at 5:19am<b>Malteser95</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 4:58pm<b>InvictusTribuni</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 11:23pm<b>Nathan23xx</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 9:32pm<b>velocityraptor</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 11:21am<b>Elgaard</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 3:11am<b>Christinesayyys</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 12:42pm<b>bigguy087</b> - the 06/24/2012 at 1:13pm

Fucked!<b>Nathan23xx</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 3:32am

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Erin_VanDerWoods's favorite FMLs

Today, I was lecturing my high school students on the importance of a good education. I pointed out the janitor in the hall and told them if they didn't stay in school, they'd end up like him. Then one of my students raised her hand and reminded me that the janitor I pointed to was her dad. FML

by daddy'sgirl / 06/21/2012 at 12:11am / United States (Tennessee) / Work

Today, a police officer came to talk to the kids at my workplace. He asked what they wanted to hear about first. A group of them shouted, "The donuts, tells us about the donuts." Apparently these idiots are the future of my country. FML

by Joseph N / 06/19/2012 at 12:08pm / United States / Kids

Today, I was reading erotic literature and noticed several errors in syntax, resulting in my mood being killed. I was cockblocked by my need for grammatical correctness. FML

by Anonymous / 06/17/2012 at 12:53am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was driving my parrot home from the vet. As I was driving home, I decided to let her sit on my shoulder. Something scared her, and she started flapping in my face, causing me to crash my car into a tree. FML

by Anna / 06/15/2012 at 5:43am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I was cashiering, and a customer's change came to $5.51. She looked pretty stinking rich, so I just gave her $5.50. She demanded the extra penny, and I asked if she really needed it. She said, "No, but they do, asshole," and dropped her $5.51 in the charity donation box. FML

by ouch / 06/13/2012 at 12:00pm / United States (Florida) / Money

Today, I saw Thor and I wanted to see how realistic it was to be swinging a hammer around. Wrong idea. I ended up unconscious on the ground for ten whole minutes. FML

by runner2731 / 06/08/2012 at 4:09am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, while waiting for a bus, someone started smoking at the bus shelter, which is illegal in my city. I politely asked him to stop smoking, citing the city ordinance. He just cackled and said that if I'm so concerned about the state of my health, I should start by losing 90 pounds. FML

by Anonymous / 06/07/2012 at 1:42pm / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, I walked in on my roommate trying to smoke a Mars bar. FML

by holyshart / 06/05/2012 at 5:03am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my parents grounded me for finding their stash of weed. The irony is killing me right now. FML

by ironyisabitch / 06/02/2012 at 1:43am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my colleagues had replaced my email auto-responder with a message saying, "I'm away for two weeks in Brazil. Due to the surgery, when I return, please address me by my new name: Crystal." FML

by Monsieur-Madame / 05/31/2012 at 4:19pm / France (Champagne-Ardenne) / Love

Today, while sitting in my Forensic Psychology class, my professor listed all of the main traits that indicate someone may very well be a sociopath. Every single trait described my fiancé perfectly. FML

by Getmeout / 05/31/2012 at 2:50am / United States (Virginia) / Love

Today, my fiancé and I planned a romantic movie night. Champagne, popcorn, romantic comedy. Then his friend decided to show up and they've been talking about 1st generation Pokémon ever since. FML

by Anonymous / 05/21/2012 at 7:14pm / United States / Love

Today, I'm on a trip to Poland with some friends. We came to experience the country's culture, and to challenge our preconceptions about this part of Europe. We had sat on a bench, and not ten seconds later, a stranger approached and asked, "How much for your friend?" FML

by LearnToLive / 05/15/2012 at 11:59am / Holidays

Today, my boss at my new job asked whether I was fitting in OK. The company is Swedish, so as a joke, I said that at home I now serve all my food as a smorgasbord, chew on fermented herring and Daim chocolate bars, and buy all my furniture at Ikea. She didn't see the funny side. FML

by Isa / 05/15/2012 at 2:48am / United States / Work

Today, I accidentally adopted a dolphin for $125. FML

by Optimus_Prime97 / 05/02/2012 at 10:39pm / United States / Money