About Entheatus : I am a Chinese Animal Biology student at the University of Guelph in Ontario.
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Entheatus's favorite FMLs
Today, I was called a "whore," a "demon," a "piece of shit," and a "disrespectful bitch." All of this happened because I wouldn't let my mother-in-law borrow my car. This is a woman with multiple speeding tickets. FML
by sigh / 12/21/2011 at 7:39am / United States / Transportation
by Nicki / 12/21/2011 at 7:30am / Canada / Intimacy
by tarynfaye / 12/21/2011 at 6:28am / United States / Love
by Anonymous / 12/21/2011 at 1:18am / Canada (Quebec) / Intimacy
by 409sPoisonGirl / 12/21/2011 at 12:12am / Australia / Love
by bathtime / 12/20/2011 at 11:32pm / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy
by Thomas / 12/20/2011 at 10:18pm / United States (South Carolina) / Work
Today, someone put dog turds underneath all the decorative reindeers' butts in my front yard. The chief suspect is my curmudgeonly, holidays-hating fuckball of a neighbor. Last week he repositioned them in very suggestive poses. FML
by Anonymous / 12/20/2011 at 9:01pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, after spending months learning how to play the guitar and memorizing the music to my girlfriend's all-time favorite song, I performed it for her. Her response? "Well, you kind of ruined that song for me now." FML
by tommy / 12/20/2011 at 5:41pm / United States (Georgia) / Love
by imamomma / 12/20/2011 at 1:59pm / United States / Kids
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting hot and heavy. She had her shirt off, and commented on the small size of her breasts. Trying to make her feel better, I said I dated smaller breasts. She replied by saying she'd dated bigger penises. FML
by Ryan / 12/20/2011 at 12:57pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy
by awalc / 12/20/2011 at 12:48pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 12/20/2011 at 12:16pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
Today, I'm on a medication that really dehydrates my skin. I thought split lips were the worst side effects. Other split orifices make a trip to the toilet a literal pain in the arse. No sign of stopping in the near future. FML
by ouch / 12/20/2011 at 7:46am / Australia (Western Australia) / Health
by dogwheels / 12/20/2011 at 6:54am / United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne) / Work
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, I was eating my lunch. When I opened my mouth to eat a spoonful of rice, a bee flew right…