About EnterSandman : Some rainbows have something better at the end than a pot of gold.
If I click on your account, don't worry. I just have the app on my iPhone and sometimes fat thumbs make it difficult to thumb comments, or your picture looked hilarious but was too small to see without clicking on.
Anyways, thanks for taking the time to look at this (I think). If you happened to click this profile by mistake, don't worry. I won't hunt you down and release thousands of fire ants in your bed, I like my world drama-free.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Today, I couldn't contain my laughter when a patient told me she'd named her unborn daughter Twinkie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25140) - you deserved it (3568)
On 01/06/2012 at 5:49pm - work - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I had an upset stomach. I lay down in bed with a bucket nearby just in case. Later on, the urge to vomit overcame me, and I puked into the bucket. I realised too late that my cat had chosen to sleep in it. He jumped out and spread vomit all over my apartment. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31511) - you deserved it (3750) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I was on the train listening to my iPod on shuffle. The "Oompa Loompa" song came on, and slightly amused, I started humming it. It wasn't until I noticed that the man next to me was a midget that I understood the horrified looks I was getting. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26868) - you deserved it (6970)
On 01/05/2012 at 1:39pm - misc - by lorahayes (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, I realized my wife often switches the TV channel from the crime dramas we both like, to Hollywood gossip shows that I can't stand, just to get me to leave the room. From the other room, I can see that she switches back once I've left. She's probably been doing this for years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23403) - you deserved it (2329)
On 12/23/2011 at 9:24pm - love - by unwanted (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, my boyfriend told me love is like a drug. I started tearing up because this is the most romantic he has been in a while. He then went on to break up with me, telling me that my "prescription is up". FML
I agree, your life sucks (25256) - you deserved it (2341)
On 12/22/2011 at 3:09am - love - by Jean - United Kingdom (Surrey)
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via the medium of free-style rapping. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25471) - you deserved it (3171)
On 12/17/2011 at 12:03pm - love - by Emily - United States (Indiana)
Today, I heard my alarm go off, dragged myself out of bed, had breakfast and got ready for work. As I was heading out the door I checked the time again. It was 1:41 AM. Apparently my alarm never actually went off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25119) - you deserved it (3998)
On 12/15/2011 at 3:12pm - misc - by 2285morgan - United States
Today, it was my first time as a hockey referee, for a game played by 7-year-olds. At one point, a little boy tripped another boy. Doing my job, I gave him 2 minutes in the penalty box. After the game, I was attacked by a mob of parents. I was even given an optometrist's business card. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18567) - you deserved it (226)
On 12/07/2011 at 12:26am - work - by gmnesbitt - United States (Michigan)
Today, I went to the doctor for a check up, having had a head injury a week ago and suffering some memory loss. Turns out, the medicine he gave me for my head has memory loss as a side effect. He then said "I told you. Don't you remember?" After I said no he said "I figured." and giggled. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21084) - you deserved it (1683)
On 12/04/2011 at 2:04am - health - by memoryloss (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I went into hospital and was being treated by a really cute doctor. Not knowing that I was going to end up here, I put on novelty underwear this morning. Well, at least he found the little green glow-in-the-dark skulls amusing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16049) - you deserved it (4643)
On 12/01/2011 at 12:09pm - misc - by Hot Pants (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I discovered that my dog is an aspiring underwear designer, her latest project being creating crotchless underwear. Mine seem to have been used as prototypes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19773) - you deserved it (2574)
On 11/09/2011 at 9:48am - animals - by blacktyaffair - United States (Texas)
Today, after a stressful series of events, I went to the beach to unwind. I sat on the sand, breathed in deeply and closed my eyes, trying to find some sort of inner peace. Then a seagull shat on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23529) - you deserved it (2225)
On 10/19/2011 at 5:40am - misc - by targe - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, after 4 months of no family contact while deployed in the military, I receive an email from my mother. Attached was a picture of a toilet full of green shit, with a message from my mom saying, "Seen neon poo before? Thought I would share!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (20679) - you deserved it (1405)
On 09/29/2011 at 8:27am - misc - by btchzloveit (man) - United States (Armed Forces Pacific)
Today, I woke up next to my boss naked. We are both women and she is married. Work should be interesting tomorrow. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16116) - you deserved it (32334)
On 09/26/2011 at 2:20pm - intimacy - by BigBananaLover - United States (California)
Today, the girl I've been dating, and starting to fall in love with, walked out of the bathroom claiming we were going to be parents. I jumped off of the couch in disbelief, yelling, "Really?" She replied, "Really. I just gave birth to a huge dump baby." FML
I agree, your life sucks (33926) - you deserved it (6436)
On 09/11/2011 at 11:13am - misc - by CaseyFpC85 - United States (Florida)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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