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EnterSandman

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EnterSandman

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4539
  • Number of comments : 216
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 109 posted

About EnterSandman : Just a dude that's had too many concussions and works 3rd shift so my brain has a rather strange thought process (when it has a thought process).

I love metal, so I give myself even more concussions head banging to the likes of Metallica, etc. I also do a bit of writing in my spare time since I take sleep aids that give me really weird dreams that could make awesome books (if I ever actually finish one and get it published, that is).

If I click on your account, don't worry. I just have the app on my iPhone and sometimes fat thumbs make it difficult to thumb comments, or your picture looked hilarious but was too small to see without clicking on. Anyways, thanks for taking the time to look at this (I think). If you happened to click this profile by mistake, don't worry. I won't hunt you down and release thousands of fire ants in your bed, I like my world drama-free.

EnterSandman's page activity

Visits<b>YourAuntsCousin</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 3:17am<b>vaderismyfriend</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 3:32pm<b>BellaP13</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 5:19pm<b>YouMadBra</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 12:56pm<b>paintedwings12</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 2:58pm<b>Starfoxx</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 2:08pm<b>Budderchook</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 9:35am<b>Franniee_</b> - the 05/31/2014 at 11:39am<b>eb9821</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 10:54am<b>janey000</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 7:21pm<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 9:38pm<b>Mynameislinh</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 9:03pm<b>Narttu</b> - the 03/08/2014 at 10:22am<b>lalalexie88</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 12:41am<b>umakemesic</b> - the 11/25/2013 at 2:47pm<b>chodenugget</b> - the 11/14/2013 at 12:01pm<b>EllaJSwiftie</b> - the 11/06/2013 at 8:28am<b>ged</b> - the 10/23/2013 at 7:46pm

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EnterSandman's favorite FMLs

Today, I got my retainer fitted. It stimulates my gag reflex so badly that I gag every time I try so say anything with a 'P' in it. My orthodontist laughed and suggested I get a thesaurus. FML

#20485855
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28731) - you deserved it (2370)

On 01/30/2013 at 2:52am - health - by Miss Blairgowrie (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, it's been two months since I got a kitten. He loves to hide, and then surprise me by jumping out of his hiding place. It was quite a surprise when he launched himself out of my bag during class. FML

#20483320
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45522) - you deserved it (5937) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/28/2013 at 2:52pm - animals - by Kitten_Love - Sent from mobile version

Today, someone put a whole packet of glitter on the blades of my ceiling fan. Too bad I only noticed when I turned it on. FML

#20482822
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29300) - you deserved it (3616)

On 01/28/2013 at 8:55am - misc - by hopelessteej (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was suffering from an asthma attack, so I grabbed my inhaler and took a puff. This was probably very disturbing for the earwig which had somehow made my puffer its home, as I discovered when it shot into my mouth. FML

#20477568
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29466) - you deserved it (2413)

On 01/25/2013 at 1:30am - health - by asthmattack (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, feeling lonely after my recent breakup, I put on my nicest clothes and went out clubbing with a few friends. I brought a guy back to my place, and we got intimate. It was going well, until he took off my push-up bra, then panicked and drunkenly asked, "Where'd they go?!" FML

#20477055
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25078) - you deserved it (48145)

On 01/24/2013 at 7:54pm - intimacy - by chase (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my mum excitedly discussed with me the prospect of starting a mother-son YouTube duo. Thinking she was joking, I went along with it. She is now installing a 24-hour webcam in the house to record our conversations, which she perceives as hilarious, and is going to upload them. FML

#20458570
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31861) - you deserved it (7630)

On 01/14/2013 at 5:06am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went shopping. At the counter, the cashier started flirting with me and asked me for my number. He was cute, so I gave it to him. After walking out of the store, I got a text that said, "I didn't want to say it out loud, but your pants are unzipped." FML

#20427288
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35916) - you deserved it (5073)

On 12/28/2012 at 2:49am - misc - by Ren - United States (Ohio)

Today, I told my husband to tell me his wildest fantasy. He told me it was to put on fake antlers and "do it like deer". FML

#20415339
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35340) - you deserved it (7616)

On 12/23/2012 at 1:19am - intimacy - by Kasey Eames - United States (California)

Today, I received my soccer team jacket that I ordered a month ago. Trying to save money, I'd selected the "no name" option to avoid an extra $20 embroidering fee. My jacket now has "NO NAME" spelled out on the side of it, and I was charged the extra $20 dollars after all. FML

#20415162
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39138) - you deserved it (7197)

On 12/23/2012 at 12:01am - money - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, while talking to my boyfriend, he got upset and accused me of making up words to make him feel stupid. All because I used the word "vapid." FML

#20414233
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25624) - you deserved it (7068)

On 12/22/2012 at 5:19pm - misc - by seriously? (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my bra clasp broke in the middle of a job interview. I got the job on the spot. I'm scared to report into work. FML

#20407793
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29891) - you deserved it (3788)

On 12/19/2012 at 5:06pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I have a very uncomfortable cyst in my armpit and a sprained ankle both on my right side, resulting in me limping and keeping my arm awkwardly plastered to my side. My fiancé keeps walking like me and calling me Igor, saying "Yes, Master" whenever I ask him for something. FML

#20406767
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29134) - you deserved it (3545)

On 12/19/2012 at 12:16am - health - by Igor (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was bartending. A guest was getting belligerent so I had to cut him off. He called me a bitch and threw the rest of his drink in my face before storming off. The belligerent asscandle was my boyfriend. FML

#20193528
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24064) - you deserved it (4105)

On 12/06/2012 at 6:50am - love - by FMyEx - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my elbow was having cramps and movement issues as a result of an old set of surgical pins and wires that are being rejected by my body. One painful twitch caused my arm to lock out straight, unintentionally slapping my hand into my co-worker's crotch. Our waiting customers giggled. FML



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