About EnterSandman : Some rainbows have something better at the end than a pot of gold.
If I click on your account, don't worry. I just have the app on my iPhone and sometimes fat thumbs make it difficult to thumb comments, or your picture looked hilarious but was too small to see without clicking on.
Anyways, thanks for taking the time to look at this (I think). If you happened to click this profile by mistake, don't worry. I won't hunt you down and release thousands of fire ants in your bed, I like my world drama-free.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Today, I was driving home at night, and got into an accident. Someone had left a toilet in the middle of the road. I hit it. The toilet's fine, but my car now has a toilet-shaped dent in the front. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26271) - you deserved it (4569)
On 03/22/2011 at 1:10pm - misc - by jballer - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my dad’s best friend, who has been his business associate for the past 28 years, took me to a Star Wars store for my 18th birthday. He put on a Darth Vader helmet, and imitating his voice, said: "I am your father." I laughed. It wasn’t a joke. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36559) - you deserved it (2261) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins
Today, my mom duly informed me I'm the reason people have middle fingers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19819) - you deserved it (4381)
On 12/31/2010 at 8:16pm - misc - by edulover (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was driving my family home, when my 7 year old son had to pee. Having long since passed any rest stops, I made him use a bottle. Once he was done, he grenaded the bottle out the window, hitting someone's windshield dead on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8016) - you deserved it (21806)
On 12/13/2010 at 2:35am - misc - by wtfson -
Today, my chemistry professor made us all leave our classroom mid-lab because the class was complaining of the smell, and he was worried that there was a gas leak from one of the Bunsen burners. There wasn't, but it's nice to know my "silent but deadly" smelled like it might actually kill. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7624) - you deserved it (23311)
On 09/23/2010 at 12:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I put an anonymous note under my neighbour's door asking them to not have sex so loudly during the day. Since then, I haven't heard any sex. Unfortunately, I have heard a woman crying loudly because she just found out about her husband's affair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36324) - you deserved it (7754)
On 09/22/2010 at 3:04pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)
Today, I was at the grocery store with my five year old son when I had to go to the bathroom. After doing my business and we started walking out of the bathroom, my son loudly announced to the whole store, "Mommy has diarrhea!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (22859) - you deserved it (2942)
On 09/01/2010 at 7:04pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, my incredibly self conscious girlfriend decided to get over her fears and let me see her in her underwear. She did a short strip tease, crawled on top of me and asked what I thought. I couldn't think of anything to say besides, "Your bra and panties don't match." FML
I agree, your life sucks (7324) - you deserved it (58523)
On 08/19/2010 at 3:16pm - intimacy - by captainocd - United States (Texas)
Today, I shaved off the beard I had been forced to grow over the past 3 weeks due to forgetting my razor when away. 15 Minutes in, with half my beard gone, I realised I had got a tan everywhere but my beard. I now have a large white patch on my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21612) - you deserved it (9095)
On 08/18/2010 at 8:01am - misc - by Herbiee (man) - United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne)
Today, I asked my boyfriend what he wanted for for his birthday in a couple of days. He replied "to be single" and walked out of the room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33575) - you deserved it (3575)
On 08/11/2010 at 6:40am - love - by gutsforme (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, I decided to call the number a cute guy had scribbled onto a napkin and given to me. I was greeted by, "Hello, this is Dr. Allen's office." Surprised, because I didn't remember his name being anything close to Allen, I asked who Dr. Allen was. She's a psychologist. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21287) - you deserved it (3918)
On 08/07/2010 at 1:10pm - misc - by TRalalla (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my kids surprised me when I got home. One of them played the Rocky theme song on the stereo, and the other came up to me and said, "Daddy, let's go. We need you to drop about 15 pounds before you appear in front of all of our friends at our play." FML
I agree, your life sucks (22795) - you deserved it (5777)
On 07/19/2010 at 9:59am - kids - by Cody (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I fell down the stairs carrying a huge TV. Don't worry, my body cushioned the TV's fall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23137) - you deserved it (3303)
On 05/26/2010 at 10:21am - misc - by hatestomove - United States (Texas)
Today, I did my laundry. When I took it out, everything was clean, including the mouse that had been hiding in it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21819) - you deserved it (3932)
On 03/17/2010 at 11:22am - misc - by socksoffire (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I lost my phone. I tried to call it using my husband's phone, but couldn't figure out which of the three Kates in the contact list was me. Turns out, two are co-workers and one is his aunt. I was listed under Satan. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33052) - you deserved it (6593)
On 03/15/2010 at 7:22pm - love - by Satan (woman) - United States (Washington)
Friday 24 May 2013
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