Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Emmy_The_Great

Search for a member

Emmy_The_Great

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 15906
  • Number of comments : 153
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 38 posted

About Emmy_The_Great : I had a picture of me up then I realized it looked really stupid. So I put up domo. U mad?

I'm a total nerd and am always doing some sort of work, whether it's leisurely or demanded.

I'm pretty easy to talk to, though I'm also socially awkward. :D

I like cupcakes and law & order SVU.

Emmy_The_Great's page activity

Visits<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 10:47pm<b>3051628</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 11:08am<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 8:22am<b>insanecutie</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 9:33pm<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 3:39pm<b>koolkool994</b> - the 03/06/2014 at 1:14am<b>Sockturtle</b> - the 11/17/2013 at 5:57pm<b>why_teh_hell</b> - the 10/25/2013 at 1:39am<b>gamercanadian</b> - the 05/02/2013 at 2:13pm<b>EverdreamOfMe</b> - the 01/31/2013 at 2:36pm<b>mongoose80</b> - the 01/05/2013 at 11:05pm<b>Tcaret300</b> - the 04/17/2012 at 6:22pm<b>perdix</b> - the 09/14/2011 at 7:24pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:32pm<b>bleedlikeagod</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 7:13pm<b>splitsides</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 6:45pm<b>pandora_geass</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 6:06pm<b>jren207</b> - the 09/05/2011 at 3:42am

Fucked!<b>insanecutie</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 3:33am

Emmy_The_Great's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Emmy_The_Great's favorite FMLs

Today, I have my first university lecture on lab safety. Having gone out the night before with my house-mates, I have the worst hangover of my life, and have to listen for an hour and a half while they loudly demonstrate the types of alarms we'll hear in different kinds of emergencies. FML

#18138100
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12346) - you deserved it (47070)

On 11/02/2011 at 12:39pm - misc - by ...loud noises...urgh... (woman) - United Kingdom (York)

Today, I have an ear infection, and everything I hear echoes inside my head. I'm an orchestra teacher, and we have our first concert next week. FML

#18031007
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27918) - you deserved it (2269)

On 10/20/2011 at 12:44pm - work - by dolceconfuoco (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I came home crying and informed my mother that someone had called me a 'fat bitch' today. She held me at arms length, looked me straight in the eyes, and lovingly said, "You can't change who you are." FML

#18030878
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33493) - you deserved it (6239)

On 10/20/2011 at 12:16pm - misc - by Anonymous - Ireland (Meath)

Today, this weird girl started texting me. I really didn't want to talk to her, so I texted back, "This message could not be delivered because of a temporery network setup error. Error 2128-226110." She replied, "You spelt temporary wrong." FML

#18026685
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10969) - you deserved it (62568)

On 10/19/2011 at 9:38pm - misc - by tommyboy783 - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I learned that the only reason most of my students come to lecture is that they have a running bet on how many times I say "OK" in two hours. It was 137 last week. FML

#18025254
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22413) - you deserved it (9054)

On 10/19/2011 at 6:42pm - work - by Habit - United Kingdom (Leeds)

Today, my twin boys who are 5 decided to teach each other how to fly off the shed out back. They are still in their pajamas. Batman's arm is broken and Spiderman has a slight concussion. FML

#18022351
318 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34996) - you deserved it (6673)

On 10/19/2011 at 10:03am - kids - by optimistic2628 - United States

Today, at work, I misheard a customer telling me a story. To be polite, I did a slight laugh and nodded my head. She actually told me her mum had died. FML

#18021028
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23384) - you deserved it (19976)

On 10/19/2011 at 1:38am - work - by derbyboy - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, after having had sex with my girlfriend for the first time the night before, she went to the doctor. He said she's still physically a virgin. FML

#18015213
323 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53666) - you deserved it (8343)

On 10/18/2011 at 1:34pm - intimacy - by Mini-wanker (man) - United States (New York)

Today, while performing a rectal exam on my female patient, I inadvertently said, "Okay, you're going to feel some pleasure now." I meant "pressure". Her husband was in the room. FML

#18014569
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44419) - you deserved it (8875)

On 10/18/2011 at 11:01am - intimacy - by imy - United States (Texas)

Today, I thought I'd be helpful and pick up my Dad's car from the repairs shop for him while he was at work. So, on my own, I hopped in my car and I drove the 15 minutes out to the shop. Only upon arriving did I consider the situation I'd put myself in. FML

Today, while sitting on the toilet, my phone pocket dialed my boss's cell. He was in the next stall. He answered. FML

#18010067
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30817) - you deserved it (3670)

On 10/17/2011 at 9:14pm - work - by number2 - United States

Today, I was given an entire week of detention for planking on my school desk. FML

#18008479
321 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14836) - you deserved it (72779)

On 10/17/2011 at 6:05pm - misc - by planking champion (woman) - United States (North Dakota)

Today, I went to a concert. I got into a fist fight with a drunk girl. My older brother tried to pull me away from her by holding both my arms back. I spent the last half of the concert in the hospital because I couldn't shield my face. FML

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years felt comfortable enough with me to disclose that he had previously spent 4 years in a mental institute because he tried to kill his mother. He also told me we will be together forever. I'm scared. FML

#18005142
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52975) - you deserved it (4901)

On 10/17/2011 at 6:02am - love - by bubba - China

Today, my 28-year-old brother who has been pranking me all my life, put a chocolate cupcake on my chair. I sat on it, with my white dress. On my wedding day. FML

#18004959
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68225) - you deserved it (4132)

On 10/17/2011 at 4:39am - misc - by cupcake_butt - United States



FML's blog

  • Feeling shitty? Write to Auntie Bernie!
  • It's a new summer, so here's a new feature. OK, that doesn't mean much, but you've got to start somewhere. The idea came from the fact that we get sent a lot of FMLs that touch us, in our heart of…

Friday 24 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: