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Today, I was with my family at a buffet getting dessert. As I had my chocolate cake in hand, I grabbed an extra slice of cheesecake for my mom because I knew she would like a slice. Upon returning to my table, a couple walking behind me commented, "See, that's why Americans are so obese." FML
I agree, your life sucks (40259) - you deserved it (7152)
On 03/09/2009 at 4:25am - misc - by McChunky =( - United States (California)
Today, I laced up my fabulous new boots and walked outside to find my hot neighbor, with whom I carpool every morning. I struck a pose, feeling quite confident. Upon taking my first step down the stairs, I fell forward. I woke up an hour later with 7 stitches in my head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16441) - you deserved it (29613)
On 03/07/2009 at 12:16pm - misc - by Triple F (woman) - United States (Iowa)
Today, my family gathered at my 96 year old great-grandmother's surprise birthday party that was my idea. When she walked in, we surprised her so much that she literally had a heart attack. She is now in the hospital. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47579) - you deserved it (9037)
On 03/01/2009 at 5:04pm - misc - by Ashley J. (woman) - United States (West Virginia)
Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it. He said, "I don't know what you're talking about, Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML
I agree, your life sucks (989098) - you deserved it (78713)
On 02/28/2009 at 6:10am - love - by thatsucks (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)
Today, I was in my room and I drew a Harry Potter lightning bolt on my forehead in eyeliner because it cheers me up. Then some friends came over, so we went out to get yogurt, and when I got back I realized the lightning bolt was still there. I'm in college. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9334) - you deserved it (58791)
On 02/27/2009 at 3:57am - misc - by Fenny (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my boss called me into his office to show me the web site of a potential business partner. When he began to type 'virginia' into google, it auto-completed his search with his recent search for 'virgin boy assholes'. I have to go on business trip with him tomorrow. I'm a young guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (407839) - you deserved it (26469)
On 02/13/2009 at 10:54am - intimacy - by The Sbeak (man) - United States (Rhode Island)
Today, my boss fired me via text message. I don't have a text messaging plan. I paid $0.25 to get fired. FML
I agree, your life sucks (229457) - you deserved it (22790)
On 02/10/2009 at 12:36am - misc - by maxthndr (man) - United States
Today, my crush talked to me for the first time. He told me to stop staring. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26819) - you deserved it (9267)
On 02/09/2009 at 7:37pm - misc - by hatethatiloveyou (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, my boyfriend handcuffed me to the bed, naked. Someone pulled the fire alarm, and my boyfriend couldn't find the key. So he left me, and the Resident Advisor found me. The fireman had to cut the chain. FML
I agree, your life sucks (222657) - you deserved it (37810)
On 02/06/2009 at 10:55pm - misc - by hahahehehohohoo (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. When he was about to orgasm, he screamed "Yes Brittany!" at the top of his lungs. My name's not Brittany. That's his sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (526779) - you deserved it (37881)
On 02/06/2009 at 10:29am - intimacy - by caroline (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I decided to send my boyfriend a pic text of me naked. I accidentally sent it to my dad and got a text back saying, "You definitely take after your mom." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29802) - you deserved it (49026)
On 02/05/2009 at 9:09am - intimacy - by ruffrider (woman) - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I finally finished my 500 page manuscript and so went out to buy some paper to print it off. I get back home and find out my dad has infected my computer with a virus and the only way to save it was to wipe the hard drive, which he did. That script took me a year and I have no backup. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28367) - you deserved it (17658)
On 01/24/2009 at 2:15am - misc - by David3000 - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I found out my boyfriend's mom tried to bribe him with an iPhone to dump me. He accepted. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23219) - you deserved it (1252)
On 01/19/2009 at 6:12am - love - by f'ed_over - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I lent my brand new earrings to one of my friends. Everyone told her that they are pretty, and look really great on her. I've been wearing them for the last 3 weeks, and no one has ever mentioned them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14462) - you deserved it (1238)
On 01/05/2009 at 10:27pm - misc - by sel2207 - Sent from mobile version
Monday 20 May 2013
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