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Elsan

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Elsan

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4035
  • Number of comments : 23
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Elsan's page activity

Visits<b>krazayman</b> - the 08/20/2013 at 9:21am<b>Covenant74</b> - the 03/07/2013 at 8:20pm<b>PlaySpades</b> - the 12/29/2012 at 12:48pm<b>Zaqy</b> - the 12/18/2012 at 9:26pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:34pm<b>xfmylifexxx</b> - the 11/22/2009 at 12:58am<b>shmuh</b> - the 08/03/2009 at 8:12am

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Elsan's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up after a night out drinking on my sofa, with an electric dog collar around my neck and handcuffs on my wrists. The keys were on the other side of the invisible doggy fence. FML

#15154591
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13458) - you deserved it (34828)

On 02/28/2011 at 8:10pm - health - by stupiddrunk (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my assistant manager was arguing with a customer. I interjected letting the customer know that "we want everything to be copacetic." After the customer left, I received a write up for using "big words." FML

#15150978
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25460) - you deserved it (4835)

On 02/28/2011 at 11:26am - work - by Username -

Today, I tried a new sugar scrub soap that's supposed to help get rid of cellulite. I didn't read the instructions correctly and now as well as still having the cellulite, my butt looks like I got a massage from an angry cat. FML

#15144008
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6919) - you deserved it (29933)

On 02/27/2011 at 9:20pm - health - by shirley (woman) - Spain

Today, I found out the hard way that you can get carpal tunnel from masturbating. FML

#15143494
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11825) - you deserved it (37063)

On 02/27/2011 at 8:36pm - intimacy - by Nuttjacob (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I got a call from the police dept. My ex-boyfriend is applying for a job there, and they called me to ask if he was "a good candidate for a police officer." I had to start my day off by saying great, nice things about the guy who broke my heart and completely disrespected me. FML

Today, I desperately tried to explain to my boyfriend why he shouldn't talk about the bible during sex. He honestly doesn't understand. FML

#15067918
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35075) - you deserved it (6950)

On 02/21/2011 at 6:15pm - intimacy - by Clare (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I went to my "not so technologically advanced" grandma's house to help her out with her computer. It appears she has very interesting conversations with the man who lives in the apartment above her. FML

#15061511
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27781) - you deserved it (3355)

On 02/21/2011 at 2:46am - intimacy - by Josie (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, at my strictly Catholic grandmother's funeral, I was made to sit in the row behind the rest of the family, because I was born out of wedlock and wasn't a 'real' member. FML

#15055415
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38687) - you deserved it (2497)

On 02/20/2011 at 7:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I was in class when someone came in with a rose for me. My teacher made me read the card aloud: "I'm breaking up with you, happy Valentine's." It was from my boyfriend. FML

#14973711
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44021) - you deserved it (3103)

On 02/14/2011 at 1:14pm - love - by sexyredhead - United States

Today, after dealing with tons of drama and working a 14 hour shift, I took a shower. When I stepped out, a weak spot in the floor gave way. While falling through the floor I grabbed the toilet tank lid, which fell into the tank and broke it. Now my leg hurts and the bathroom's flooded. FML

#14969181
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28641) - you deserved it (2777)

On 02/14/2011 at 2:11am - misc - by TheKingDavis (man) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I dreamed I was getting married. I was wearing a white dress, had incredible cleavage and perfectly done makeup. Just one problem. I'm a guy. FML

#14968643
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46815) - you deserved it (9271)

On 02/14/2011 at 1:24am - misc - by bride (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was busily having fun with my girlfriend, when suddenly the bedroom door opened and a man walked in, picked me up, and threw me outside the apartment. I was naked and didn't even know she was into men, much less had a husband. FML

#14961230
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41875) - you deserved it (8710)

On 02/13/2011 at 5:32pm - intimacy - by Katrina (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I found out that my boyfriend cheated on me with my best friend. I texted her and I would never talk to her again. But I accidentally sent it to my other best friend, who responded, "I'm so sorry, I never meant for you to find out". My two best friends cheated with my boyfriend. FML

#14943630
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55154) - you deserved it (4252)

On 02/12/2011 at 12:19am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I finally found out whether or not my boyfriend is cheating on me. Turns out he isn't. He is cheating on his wife, with me. FML

#14904173
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45757) - you deserved it (5829)

On 02/09/2011 at 12:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I got mugged. But luckily I had on my keyring the pepper spray that my husband had insisted I keep with me. Unlucky for me, my husband's co-worker, who borrowed my keys, emptied my pepper by spraying it on a brick wall one day when he was bored. FML

#14902184
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30663) - you deserved it (2651)

On 02/08/2011 at 10:27pm - misc - by Username -



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