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Elsan

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Elsan

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 3325
  • Number of comments : 23
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Elsan's page activity

Visits<b>krazayman</b> - the 08/20/2013 at 9:21am<b>Covenant74</b> - the 03/07/2013 at 8:20pm<b>PlaySpades</b> - the 12/29/2012 at 12:48pm<b>Zaqy</b> - the 12/18/2012 at 9:26pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:34pm<b>xfmylifexxx</b> - the 11/22/2009 at 12:58am<b>shmuh</b> - the 08/03/2009 at 8:12am

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Elsan's favorite FMLs

Today, I was pulled over for going the wrong way on a closed highway. The construction signs pointed me in that direction, and the cop agreed that they should be fixed. Did it stop him from giving me a ticket anyway? Nope. FML

#18096005
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31060) - you deserved it (2345)

On 10/28/2011 at 11:59am - misc - by ashleyyyy - United States (Illinois)

Today, I think my dad has finally lost his shit and is having a mid-life crisis. He showed up at my school and had me brought to the front desk. He told me to get in the car because we were going to have some "father-daughter bonding". This meant us watching Silent Hill with his work buddies. FML

#18095179
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21748) - you deserved it (2153)

On 10/28/2011 at 7:50am - misc - by -__- - Australia (Queensland)

Today, it was my birthday. We had a huge family dinner and everyone was invited, including my boyfriend. My family is kind of stuck-up, so I was very nervous about him meeting them. He got into an argument with my uncle over how "awesome" Van Halen is, and ignored me all night. FML

#18070147
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22664) - you deserved it (3771)

On 10/25/2011 at 3:10am - love - by SNBBFF - United States (Florida)

Today, without telling me, my mom dropped me off at my grandmother's house, and drove off. Now I'm supposed to spend the next month with her. Guess she forgot my grandma died six weeks ago. FML

#18062520
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45181) - you deserved it (2658)

On 10/24/2011 at 10:55am - misc - by lonely - United States (California)

Today, I woke up, showered, and began brushing my teeth. When I started to brush my tongue I gagged, like usual, and threw up a little. What's unusual? I threw up a cockroach. FML

#18052574
329 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51612) - you deserved it (4047)

On 10/23/2011 at 7:45am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I came home from work to my 3 year old daughter sniffing the rug in the living room. When I asked her what she was doing she said "Daddy smell this." So I went, got on my knees and bent down to smell it and she pushed my face in the dog crap smeared in the rug. FML

#18049596
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29957) - you deserved it (6791)

On 10/22/2011 at 10:06pm - kids - by me - United States (Maine)

Today, I got into a pretty heated argument with my boss. On my way out the door I told him he would be lucky if I came back to work. Unfortunately, I left the interior light on in my truck and it drained the battery. I had to go back in and ask for a jump. FML

#18043199
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10316) - you deserved it (31393)

On 10/22/2011 at 12:55am - work - by bob - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while cooking with my girlfriend, I thought it would be funny to slap her with a raw porkchop. She thought it would be funny to throw the hot cooking grease on me. FML

#18042854
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12568) - you deserved it (48491)

On 10/22/2011 at 12:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I ran into an old friend. I asked her how she was doing, then asked, "And your mum?" Just as the words escaped my lips, I remembered her mum died a few years ago. Trying to save face, I messed up again and blurted, "She still in the same graveyard?" FML

#18041933
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16827) - you deserved it (45837) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/21/2011 at 10:09pm - misc - by Virginiedetibo - France

Today, while at my job as a hostess, I was seating a couple and their adorable little girl. I tried to ask how old she was, but what came out was, "Aww, what breed is she?" FML

#18039986
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16885) - you deserved it (30649)

On 10/21/2011 at 5:27pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was caught skinny dipping by the police. With the arresting officer's daughter. FML

#18035123
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39886) - you deserved it (10556)

On 10/20/2011 at 10:48pm - intimacy - by skinny dipper - United States (Washington)

Today, my sister finally broke down and told me that our dad gambled away of all my college savings, and I would have to pay for school the best way I can. They have known for months, and when I asked why nobody told me, the reply was, "You're a college boy, we thought you would figure it out." FML

#18030723
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27685) - you deserved it (1997)

On 10/20/2011 at 11:39am - money - by FATS DOMINO (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, it was our 5th anniversary, so I decided to play a little joke on my girlfriend. Before I gave her the real present, an engagement ring, I gave her a gift-wrapped rolling pin instead. I ended up in the hospital. FML

#18029483
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26645) - you deserved it (17676)

On 10/20/2011 at 4:26am - love - by Awie (man) - Austria (Wien)

Today, since I was taking a dump in my wife's parents' house, I lit a candle so that it wouldn't stink. While still sitting down, I went to blow it out and apparently, no matter how strong of a man you are, you will still scream like a little girl if hot wax falls on your penis. FML

#17981787
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32841) - you deserved it (10771)

On 10/14/2011 at 11:23am - intimacy - by cduran2011 - United States (Ohio)

Today, in the senior class I teach, I asked my students who had traveled outside of the country, excluding Canada and Mexico. One student raised his hand and proudly stated, "Arizona". He wants to be a doctor. FML

#17980491
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28272) - you deserved it (2939)

On 10/14/2011 at 2:42am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)



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