About Elizabethio : My name is Elizabeth. I love animals, especially dogs. I also love my family and my awesome boyfriend.
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Elizabethio's favorite FMLs
by hannahj88 / 10/16/2010 at 12:41am / Australia / Work
by caughtorangehanded / 10/01/2010 at 6:12pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy
Today, I realized the guy I like is not deaf. This would normally be good news. However, for the past two weeks I assumed he was deaf after seeing him use sign language. I've been openly talking about him within earshot. FML
by Jackie / 09/14/2010 at 4:00pm / United States (California) / Love
by Anonymous / 09/03/2010 at 4:51pm / United States (New York) / Love
Today, while getting a lump in my private region examined by a very cute nurse, I got a massive erection. The smartest thing I could think to say at the time to her was: "I haven't been touched there in a very long time." FML
by Anonymous / 07/22/2010 at 8:39pm / United Kingdom (Gloucestershire) / Intimacy
Today, while driving through town, I was distracted by a pretty girl walking on the nearby pavement and accidentally rear-ended the car in front of me. Not only did the pretty girl witness the crash and give a statement, it turned out she was a very feminine man. FML
by Anonymous / 07/20/2010 at 6:12am / United Kingdom (Gloucestershire) / Transportation
by uhoh901 / 03/25/2010 at 7:07am / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy
Today, I was walking with my girlfriend of a year and a half on the beach. Everything was fine until she saw a plane with a banner behind it saying "Cassie, will you marry me?" She said yes. I didn't order a plane. FML
by ManInTrouble / 03/16/2010 at 12:50am / United States (California) / Love
Today, I was at the theatre watching a movie. There was a lady and a kid behind me. I all of a sudden felt ice hit my head. I turned around and asked the kid to stop, then heard his mom say, "Hit that cow!" FML
by HitbyIce / 02/07/2010 at 2:21am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, while in the shower with my girlfriend she was going on and on about how she thinks she's fat when she's in perfect shape. With what she said still on my mind, I meant to say "honey, you're so beautiful", but accidentally said "honey, you're so fat". I'll be sleeping alone tonight. FML
by showerpower / 01/20/2010 at 7:23pm / United States (Vermont) / Love
Today, I saw my four-year-old son running around outside, and copying everything our dog was doing. I thought it was cute, so I went to grab the camera. When I went back outside, I saw my dog eating a dead rabbit, and my son doing the same. FML
by Anonymous / 12/13/2009 at 7:42pm / United States (Texas) / Kids
Today, I was eating a bag of almonds I got from the bulk food store, picking off what I thought was stringy remnants of their shells. When I finally got down to the bottom of the bag, I found a silk worm circling around the last almond left of a bag of about 200. FML
by somechick / 12/09/2009 at 12:25am / Canada (Ontario) / Health
by errrmkl46 / 12/02/2009 at 1:25am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
by buhknee / 11/24/2009 at 7:08pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous
Today, I noticed that in my cover letter I wrote "I also have an eye.", instead of "I also have an eye for details.", and I have been sending it out for the past few weeks. No wonder I haven't gotten any replies. FML
by crazylobster / 11/14/2009 at 11:52am / Australia (Western Australia) / Work
- 1Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 2Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 3Today, I'm still reeling over the unexpected loss of my co-worker. I also received a notification…