Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Eivana

Offline (2 hours ago) | Search for a member

Eivana

38Fucked!

EivanaEivana
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 16 February 1991 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 53271
  • Number of comments : 275
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 50 posted

About Eivana : "I've been puking up embalming fluid for weeks."

Hello, you can call me Kamon.
I love drawing, writing, languages and music.
I am 24.
I will randomly comment.
I can be morbid, but being morbid is always exciting.

"Ahh, the past. The only thing dead that smells good."

Eivana's page activity

Visits<b>brandonwong</b> - yesterday at 4:20am<b>edmunson</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 2:39am<b>maaj</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 1:03pm<b>Apretendbiscuit</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 1:01pm<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 11:56am<b>Zaketh2112</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 11:18am<b>7liv7</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 9:49am<b>ratman775</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 7:49am<b>Skarlun</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 7:25am<b>JMichael</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 7:15am<b>hare</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 6:01am<b>shain1988</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 1:59am<b>Demii0729</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 10:20pm<b>pikmin5764</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 10:19pm<b>Capriciousfox</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 8:10pm<b>last_kings84</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 12:06pm<b>bubsenn</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 9:24pm<b>Oihana</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 7:37pm

Fucked!<b>brandonwong</b> - yesterday at 10:20am<b>bubsenn</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 11:41pm<b>philsh94</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 1:51am<b>imkool136</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 12:07pm<b>AngusEcrivain</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 9:05am<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 3:46am<b>Miss_Mandi</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 6:45pm<b>trey600rr</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 1:50am<b>karacakal2</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 5:36pm<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 6:55am<b>jacky75</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 3:26am<b>bambixhooker</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 9:01pm<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 5:46pm<b>paravoz</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 8:03am<b>keiNan</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 4:29am<b>Matheo</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 10:37pm<b>infantrysoldier</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 7:31pm<b>dudeguy1989</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 5:55pm

Eivana's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of Eivana's badges

Eivana's favorite FMLs

Today, my son got a beating. Apparently, he went to a club, waited until he saw a couple of girls pulling a duckface for a photo, then rushed over and threw pieces of bread at them. Their boyfriends, not too surprisingly, didn't appreciate this. I had to drive the idiot home from the hospital. FML

#21190541
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46115) - you deserved it (6609)

On 06/27/2014 at 5:15pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was driving my 7-year-old daughter to school, when out of nowhere a bird smashed into the windshield. Instead of screaming or being traumatized by the gore like me, my daughter started laughing, eventually calling the bird a "stupid bastard". FML

#21190484
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49576) - you deserved it (8975)

On 06/27/2014 at 4:22pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Spain (Comunidad Valenciana)

Today, I had a job interview where I was interrupted for using the word creative because there is "only one creator". FML

#21189976
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42883) - you deserved it (4336)

On 06/27/2014 at 2:11am - work - by IAMALITAHA (man) - United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne)

Today, my boyfriend informed me of how I had really hurt his feelings. Apparently, not wanting to be sent a photo of his poop is hurtful. FML

#21188342
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42584) - you deserved it (5690)

On 06/25/2014 at 7:38pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I went on a date with the girl I like, to see The Fault In Our Stars. She didn't cry, but I did. Twice, hard. FML

#21187944
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50148) - you deserved it (13180)

On 06/25/2014 at 1:45pm - love - by fredfredburger (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, as a recruiter, I had an interview with a promising candidate for an open position at my company. The interview was going well until the candidate interrupted me halfway through to take a selfie. FML

#21187434
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46473) - you deserved it (4233)

On 06/25/2014 at 1:10am - work - by Sam - United States (California)

Today, while visiting family, we went to a restaurant to eat. Towards the end of the meal, I went to use the restroom. When I came back, everyone was gone. Everyone had actually gotten into their cars and left without me. I have no idea where I am and no one is answering their phone. FML

#21185875
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54244) - you deserved it (4566)

On 06/23/2014 at 10:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I found out that the loving nickname my Chinese mother has been calling me my entire life essentially translates to "little retard". FML

#21185495
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52122) - you deserved it (5776)

On 06/23/2014 at 3:52pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, a guy at work pulled me aside to tell me that I probably shouldn't be working a job where I have to interact with customers, because of my autism. I don't have autism. FML

#21185267
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48395) - you deserved it (4444)

On 06/23/2014 at 12:19pm - work - by Badatlife (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I got written up for drinking on the job by a manager who drinks on the job, who was told to write me up by a general manager who drinks on the job, and we are all employed by an owner who drinks on the job. I haven't had a drink in 3 weeks. FML

Today, my dad thought it would be funny to spray my open window with the hose. RIP my laptop, phone, school books, wooden desk, my entire bookshelf, and my carpet. FML

#21183828
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55552) - you deserved it (4847)

On 06/22/2014 at 1:27am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, my friends thought it would be funny to slip a condom under my pillow at boot camp. The staff found out, I got bitched out for 30 minutes straight, and now I have to put a condom on the grip of any rifle I'm issued for a week. My new callsign is "Love Glove". FML

#21183341
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45354) - you deserved it (4702)

On 06/21/2014 at 5:42pm - misc - by LoveGlove (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my dad heard that the guy who bullied me at school died recently of a drug overdose. For some reason, he thinks we were actually best friends, and thinks I'm doing drugs too. I'm now not allowed out of the house except to go to school. He won't listen to a word I say. FML

#21183278
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47086) - you deserved it (3805)

On 06/21/2014 at 4:32pm - misc - by kay-z (man) - United States

Today, I stubbed the same toe three times in fifteen minutes. How? My sister moved most of the furniture in the house to the left by a few inches, because she thought it would be funny to watch me get confused and suffer. FML

#21183245
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47040) - you deserved it (6832)

On 06/21/2014 at 3:57pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, my doctor got my blood test results from the lab. He looked at me gravely and told me I had just weeks left to live. After I started hyperventilating and crying, he burst out laughing and said he was kidding. He then prescribed me some iron tablets and sent me on my way. FML

#21182241
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54187) - you deserved it (6268)

On 06/20/2014 at 7:03pm - health - by legitfile.bat.virus.exe (woman) - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: