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Eivana

Offline (the 03/13/2014 at 6:21pm) | Search for a member

Eivana

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 16 February 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 9388
  • Number of comments : 218
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 29 posted

About Eivana : I'm Kamon.
"I've been puking up embalming fluid for weeks."


Call me Kamon. You won't catch me on the RPG scene much, but when it comes to survival horrors, you got me. I love writing stories and playing video games. I love Slender Man and Pokemon, Digimon or BeyBlade. I'm picky about my music. There isn't a specific band that I like, but I like many different songs. My favorite Pokemon is Weavile. Drop me a line if you want.

Eivana's page activity

Visits<b>SkittlesGoRawr</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 9:24pm<b>Sweet_Visions</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 9:17pm<b>imagine98</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 6:23pm<b>gary3768</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 7:54am<b>dabears1011234</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 3:41am<b>jsway8</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 1:03am<b>Infamous278</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 11:23pm<b>ervnomyous</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 10:20pm<b>bossness061</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 10:46pm<b>SAspring</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 8:27am<b>Maiko_rayquaza</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 5:19pm<b>Miizuo</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 1:29pm<b>asi_nette</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 12:56pm<b>patd77</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 1:54am<b>abylenee_</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 8:51pm<b>inner_peace</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 7:25pm<b>Nsswimmer</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 9:11am<b>rebeltw</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 11:32pm

Eivana's FML badges

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You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

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You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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Eivana's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband was in our newborn's room, holding and talking to him. I guess he forgot the baby monitor, because I overheard him say, "Wanna know a secret? Daddy kills people." I really hope he was just quoting Dexter. FML

#20732635
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56927) - you deserved it (4071)

On 06/18/2013 at 1:01am - kids - by imarriedanaxemurderer (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out I'm going to be a grandfather. I'm 29, my son is 13 and the girl in question is 16. FML

#20731946
436 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59064) - you deserved it (36939)

On 06/17/2013 at 6:49pm - kids - by young grandpa - United States (Georgia)

Today, my grandma's new dildo arrived in the mail. We buried her yesterday. FML

#20731352
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68722) - you deserved it (3948)

On 06/17/2013 at 12:43pm - intimacy - by hinting (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my daughter found out what happens when my husband watches Mythbusters and doesn't heed the disclaimer to "Not try this at home." He feels bad about her cut face, but says he's proud he can throw a playing card that hard. FML

Today, my boyfriend bought another expensive bong to go with the one he bought last month, along with his new phone, airsoft gun, and various other things he's blown our money on this year. He's bought nothing to prepare for our son, though, who's due next month. FML

#20729447
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45834) - you deserved it (24888)

On 06/16/2013 at 2:11pm - money - by InconsiderateMuch (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I went to a bar for some drinks. A guy looked me up and down, gave me a suggestive smile, then asked for my name and number. I'd have been a little less creeped out if he hadn't been standing beside me at the urinal the whole time. FML

#20728225
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47077) - you deserved it (3762) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 06/15/2013 at 6:24pm - love - by Sovekipisse (man) - France (Pays de la Loire)

Today, I was going through my daughter's contacts, except all of them had names from Harry Potter. I found the name "Mom." I was relieved I didn't have some silly name, until I realized it wasn't my number; it was her father's new wife. My number was under "Voldemort." FML

#20726673
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47788) - you deserved it (20193)

On 06/15/2013 at 12:19am - kids - by Jill (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I walked into the living room, only to find my brother wanking off to an episode of My Little Pony. FML

#20726036
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61200) - you deserved it (6096)

On 06/14/2013 at 6:29pm - intimacy - by bestiality, not even once (woman) - Ireland (Waterford)

Today, my son visited for the first time in three years, asking to stay a while. It turns out he insulted someone online and gave his address in case they wanted to fight him. They accepted the offer, and so my son's imaginary Muay Thai skills went AWOL, along with his testicles. FML

#20726002
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40528) - you deserved it (4311)

On 06/14/2013 at 6:12pm - kids - by I fathered a pussy. (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I donated blood for the first time. I'm completely healthy and after waiting the appropriate amount of time I left, feeling fine. That is until I went out to eat with my family an hour later and passed out in front of the whole restaurant. FML

#20724782
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35266) - you deserved it (3685)

On 06/14/2013 at 12:39am - health - by hi_there4397 (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was at a swim meet, swimming as hard as I'd ever swum before. During the last lap I saw no one in the lanes next to me. Thinking I was first, I became extremely excited. When I came to the wall, I realized the reason no one else was around: They already finished the race. I was last. FML

#20724700
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46871) - you deserved it (7030)

On 06/14/2013 at 12:06am - misc - by :( - United States (Colorado)

Today, I started playing softball again in a league after not playing for about 5 years. My very first time at the bat I whacked a foul ball into the parking lot and hit my own car. FML

#20724193
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43144) - you deserved it (6126)

On 06/13/2013 at 7:59pm - misc - by Dingbat - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was using a public toilet, when someone in the next stall reached under, grabbed at my low-hanging toilet paper and pulled at it at an insane speed, whispering some kind of weird chant. Then he suddenly stopped, screamed, and ran out. What the hell happened in there? FML

#20723415
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47490) - you deserved it (3150)

On 06/13/2013 at 12:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, after getting my wisdom teeth pulled, I woke up from a much needed nap realizing I should take my pain medication. My mother then told me she had thrown them out so I wouldn't get addicted and become a drug dealer. FML

#20723014
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56160) - you deserved it (3151)

On 06/13/2013 at 3:05am - health - by _Tatyana_ - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, a bug buzzed into my ear. In response, I punched myself in the face. FML



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Tuesday 22 July 2014

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