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Eivana

Offline (the 03/13/2014 at 6:21pm) | Search for a member

Eivana

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 16 February 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 9417
  • Number of comments : 218
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 29 posted

About Eivana : I'm Kamon.
"I've been puking up embalming fluid for weeks."


Call me Kamon. You won't catch me on the RPG scene much, but when it comes to survival horrors, you got me. I love writing stories and playing video games. I love Slender Man and Pokemon, Digimon or BeyBlade. I'm picky about my music. There isn't a specific band that I like, but I like many different songs. My favorite Pokemon is Weavile. Drop me a line if you want.

Eivana's page activity

Visits<b>SkittlesGoRawr</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 9:24pm<b>Sweet_Visions</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 9:17pm<b>imagine98</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 6:23pm<b>gary3768</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 7:54am<b>dabears1011234</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 3:41am<b>jsway8</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 1:03am<b>Infamous278</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 11:23pm<b>ervnomyous</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 10:20pm<b>bossness061</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 10:46pm<b>SAspring</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 8:27am<b>Maiko_rayquaza</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 5:19pm<b>Miizuo</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 1:29pm<b>asi_nette</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 12:56pm<b>patd77</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 1:54am<b>abylenee_</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 8:51pm<b>inner_peace</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 7:25pm<b>Nsswimmer</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 9:11am<b>rebeltw</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 11:32pm

Eivana's FML badges

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You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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Eivana's favorite FMLs

Today, we had a guy come into the hospital with a carrot stuck deep in his anus. I've heard all kinds of ridiculous cover stories, but his took the cake; he claimed the phone rang while he was showering and he slipped onto a box of vegetables. Guess who had to extract the carrot. FML

#21179512
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51878) - you deserved it (4562)

On 06/18/2014 at 3:06pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I learned the valuable lesson that taking care of a baby crow isn't the best idea. He finally can fly away, but sits on my porch all day cawing for food. FML

#21179030
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35210) - you deserved it (11806)

On 06/18/2014 at 2:37am - animals - by a very unlucky dude. - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, while at the waterpark, some guy came up to me and profusely thanked me for wearing a one-piece swimsuit. FML

#21178301
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47890) - you deserved it (7394)

On 06/17/2014 at 4:44pm - misc - by ifeelfat (woman) - United States

Today, my coworker was telling me about his mom, when he asked about mine. I told him that I've never met my mom, because she died during my childbirth. It's a very painful subject for me, but all the same, my coworkers have decided they'll now only address me as "Tyrion". FML

#21178277
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43202) - you deserved it (4105)

On 06/17/2014 at 4:30pm - misc - by the lannisters send their retards - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my daughter told me that she liked her "other daddy" better. I don't know who's she talking about, but my wife is doing a good job telling her to be quiet. FML

#21177000
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56152) - you deserved it (3937)

On 06/16/2014 at 5:38pm - kids - by FirstDaddy (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my laziness reached an all-time high. I had a dream that I was at school and had spilled all the contents of my backpack onto the floor. I then purposely shook myself out of my sleep to avoid cleaning up the mess in my dream. FML

#21176688
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43911) - you deserved it (9905)

On 06/16/2014 at 12:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was trying on bikinis at a local store. When I put my pants back on, my foot got stuck, I tripped and fell through the curtain of the fitting room, topless. FML

#21176636
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51663) - you deserved it (7353)

On 06/16/2014 at 11:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Germany

Today, I was using my phone while in a crowded waiting room, and I accidentally tapped on a YouTube video with the volume still at maximum. The first words everyone heard? "Fuck her right in the pussy!" FML

#21174627
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46100) - you deserved it (22750)

On 06/14/2014 at 5:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was out shopping with my mom. While we were walking, a guy in a car honked at me. I'm not used to compliments, so I was pretty flattered and flashed him a smile. He looked back at me, confused, then shook his head and pointed at my mom. FML

#21173638
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41622) - you deserved it (5407)

On 06/13/2014 at 7:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I found out my husband has a fake Facebook account that he uses to add guys and live a double life as some kind of "gamer chick". This would be disturbing enough, even if he hadn't used pictures of me to give a face to his alter ego. FML

#21173506
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39727) - you deserved it (3735)

On 06/13/2014 at 5:07pm - misc - by Little Miss Fucket (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up screaming like a little bitch. I'd been having a bizarre dream where I was having sex with Homer Simpson, when he suddenly had a heart attack and fell on me, crushing me to death. I think my brain needs a douching. FML

#21171240
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44968) - you deserved it (6823)

On 06/11/2014 at 6:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was spinning some yarn around to make my new cat run in circles. After about 10 seconds, he stopped going in circles and went straight ahead, happily running several feet into the wall and knocking himself out. My bowel movements have more brain-power than this thing. FML

#21168476
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34797) - you deserved it (8481)

On 06/09/2014 at 5:45pm - animals - by jaqen h'garrrhghhgfgjhfuck (man) - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)

Today, I ran into my girlfriend by chance while out shopping. She looked different than usual. Maybe it was the wedding ring she was wearing, or how she had her arm around another gentleman, gee, I don't know. That's two years of my life wasted. FML

#21168433
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61903) - you deserved it (5032)

On 06/09/2014 at 5:03pm - love - by wrecked (man) - United States

Today, some alarm, somewhere in my house, is making a low battery noise. I've checked every smoke detector multiple times, and I can't find it. It has been hours. I'm not sure if its still doing it or if the sound has just invaded my brain. FML

Today, I got yelled at by a customer while working at a bank call center. He was furious I apologized for a mistake that someone else had made. I again apologized for apologizing. FML

#21168093
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34378) - you deserved it (4479)

On 06/09/2014 at 10:27am - work - by apologetic (woman) - United States (Kentucky)



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