Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Eivana

Online | Search for a member

Eivana

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 16 February 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 13141
  • Number of comments : 222
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 30 posted

About Eivana : I'm Kamon.
"I've been puking up embalming fluid for weeks."


Call me Kamon. You won't catch me on the RPG scene much, but when it comes to survival horrors, you got me. I love writing stories and playing video games. I love Slender Man and Pokemon, Digimon or BeyBlade. I'm picky about my music. There isn't a specific band that I like, but I like many different songs. My favorite Pokemon is Weavile. Drop me a line if you want.

Eivana's page activity

Visits<b>j_mitchell25</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 2:38pm<b>kewpiesuicide</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 12:16am<b>romanianliberty</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 11:24pm<b>iti</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 8:42pm<b>BBeffedmylife</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 7:55pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 4:57pm<b>tmd4L</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 12:08am<b>BunchieRules</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 4:56am<b>NarutoLove</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 12:46am<b>ostfaiz</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 12:34am<b>Alexeon</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 10:29pm<b>sonshadsil94</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 9:50pm<b>RapFan21</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 9:48pm<b>therealjc</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 9:24pm<b>namine120409</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 4:02am<b>emmsies</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 2:07pm<b>princessleia97</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 11:08pm<b>aron1991</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 6:38am

Eivana's FML badges

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Eivana's badges

Eivana's favorite FMLs

Today, I was watching ESPN. My boyfriend came in, bitched about "boring tv," so I handed him the remote. He put on a Lifetime movie. I must be the only woman in America with this problem. FML

#21010622
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46886) - you deserved it (4752)

On 12/30/2013 at 4:38pm - love - by smokecloud_ (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I tried to prove to my girlfriend how much I've matured and that our relationship comes before anything else in my life. So I went to delete my character in World of Warcraft. I tried to confirm it, but I couldn't, breaking down in tears instead. FML

#21010392
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34686) - you deserved it (28007)

On 12/30/2013 at 12:20pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my 4-year-old daughter figured out how to set a parental code lock on our television so we can't watch football because it scares her when we scream. She won't tell us no matter what we bribe her with. FML

#21010264
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44974) - you deserved it (23400)

On 12/30/2013 at 7:10am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I took an extra xanax to help with my anxiety, then went to sleep. I guess it was probably too much, because I woke up a few hours later, freaking out and panicking because I was convinced I was a bee trapped in a human body. FML

#21008430
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40266) - you deserved it (9585)

On 12/28/2013 at 4:19pm - health - by beemove (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I asked my husband to try a little foreplay for once, instead of just rushing into sex. His idea of foreplay was to sweetly whisper that he was going to "penis" me so hard. That's the first time I've heard the word "penis" used as a verb, and hopefully the last. FML

#21007475
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48740) - you deserved it (6439)

On 12/27/2013 at 5:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I got a whistle key finder from my grandma for Christmas. This would have been nice if I could actually whistle. FML

#21005460
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28637) - you deserved it (4431)

On 12/25/2013 at 9:07pm - misc - by princesss_14 - United States (Texas)

Today, I received a pair of earrings, a necklace, and some rings as a Christmas gift from my grandma. This would have been nice if I weren't a guy. This is her way of mocking me for wearing what she calls "girl colors", such as white. FML

#21004875
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37866) - you deserved it (2984)

On 12/25/2013 at 12:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I got a call at 4 in the morning from the security company, saying someone had broken into my workplace. I drove an hour out there, only to find out it was a rat that had set off the alarm. FML

#21000984
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38877) - you deserved it (2988)

On 12/22/2013 at 1:56am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, a man started a deep conversation with me at the bus stop about life, death, and the miracles of things we take for granted every day. I was really enjoying it until he looked at his watch and said, "Oh shit, mushrooms make me lose track of time!" and ran off into the night. FML

#20998821
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39035) - you deserved it (4383)

On 12/20/2013 at 3:45am - misc - by whatjusthappened (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I dropped a new 50lb box of tiles. Luckily, none of the tiles broke. I'm assuming this is because my foot cushioned the fall. FML

#20998674
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36885) - you deserved it (3796)

On 12/19/2013 at 11:41pm - misc - by ouch - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I canceled my Gamefly account. Seems that was the only thing keeping us together. FML

#20998173
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36219) - you deserved it (3981)

On 12/19/2013 at 3:52pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend said he was in love with my best friend instead of me. I wouldn't be so upset if it wasn't the third boyfriend in a row this happened with. FML

#20997702
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51037) - you deserved it (4417)

On 12/19/2013 at 1:13am - love - by hot_friend (woman) - United States

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. Dinner was going well until her dad secretly fed the asparagus to the dog under the table, and then "discovered" what a childish thing I had done. My girlfriend believed him. FML

#20997471
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38210) - you deserved it (2641)

On 12/18/2013 at 9:59pm - misc - by bf - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my husband and I were arguing about him not communicating anymore. Instead of talking to me about it, he messages my mom to say, "I'm not mentally strong enough to handle her anymore." FML

#20996890
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37861) - you deserved it (5056)

On 12/18/2013 at 11:44am - love - by Iloverainbows10 (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had to pee during a supervised lockdown. I asked my teacher to take me since we couldn't be in the halls alone. Since class was going, she couldn't take me. Much to my dismay, she sent a school-wide email asking for someone to take me to pee. Six teachers took me, including my principal. FML

#20996748
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44102) - you deserved it (4714)

On 12/18/2013 at 4:56am - misc - by Anon - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • Matteor's illustrated FML #2
  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: