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Eivana

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Eivana

29Fucked!

EivanaEivana
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 16 February 1991 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 48960
  • Number of comments : 259
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 47 posted

About Eivana : "I've been puking up embalming fluid for weeks."

Hello, you can call me Kamon.
I love drawing, writing, languages and music.
I am 24.
I will randomly comment.
I can be morbid, but being morbid is always exciting.

"Ahh, the past. The only thing dead that smells good."

Eivana's page activity

Visits<b>jewstooge</b> - 41 minutes ago<b>2ndSucks</b> - 2 hours ago<b>lunar999</b> - 4 hours ago<b>lindacollins423</b> - 9 hours ago<b>imafan123</b> - 12 hours ago<b>juanpegler</b> - 15 hours ago<b>christofferkamal</b> - 15 hours ago<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - 16 hours ago<b>sexymomo1234</b> - 16 hours ago<b>Ateeb</b> - 19 hours ago<b>spockadelic</b> - 20 hours ago<b>Matheo</b> - 23 hours ago<b>hayleymaybe</b> - yesterday at 1:06pm<b>hantu69</b> - yesterday at 12:55pm<b>Dave027</b> - yesterday at 12:54pm<b>imkool136</b> - yesterday at 12:45pm<b>SaniK</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 11:51am<b>daveydavidson111</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 9:27am

Fucked!<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - 10 hours ago<b>python199</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 3:25am<b>jacky75</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 3:26am<b>bambixhooker</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 9:01pm<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 5:46pm<b>paravoz</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 8:03am<b>keiNan</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 4:29am<b>Matheo</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 10:37pm<b>infantrysoldier</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 7:31pm<b>dudeguy1989</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 5:55pm<b>venomXVII</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 4:37pm<b>xluciferx666</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 3:26pm<b>pizza12</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 3:23pm<b>thunderfucked</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 1:45am<b>tinkdatank</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 4:38pm<b>dakatabg</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 4:13am<b>Nadron</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 4:47am<b>dylanger16</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 7:23pm

Eivana's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of Eivana's badges

Eivana's favorite FMLs

Today, while walking home with my mom, some unoriginal cockshart in a passing car yelled at me: "Fuck her in the pussy!" It was a long, awkward walk home after that. FML

#21308349
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30015) - you deserved it (2729)

On 11/29/2014 at 8:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, while at work, I had to spend an hour and a half on the phone, listening to an old lady relive her entire day in excruciating detail. We're not allowed to hang up on customers, and she was extremely quick to dismiss all my attempts to steer the call back on topic. FML

#21308187
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29004) - you deserved it (3168)

On 11/29/2014 at 2:45pm - work - by gotta euthanize em all (man) - Canada

Today, I thought it would be cute to put on a Santa hat and ask my crush what he wanted for Christmas. He said "A girlfriend." I took off my Santa hat and yelled "Ta-da!" He added, "An ATTRACTIVE girlfriend." FML

#21308095
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40152) - you deserved it (5168)

On 11/29/2014 at 11:28am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, we spent the day with my grandmother. During a family conversation,, my sweet little grandmother looked me up and down, and without any hesitation said, "I remember you being so beautiful," before looking at my mother, mouthing, "What happened?" and laughing. She's 87. FML

#21307421
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29786) - you deserved it (2702)

On 11/28/2014 at 7:16am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, after Thanksgiving dinner, we all played Cards Against Humanity. On one round, I was the dealer, and I received "foreskin" as a card. When I said this, my grandmother told me that apparently, after my ritual circumcision, my grandfather buried my foreskin under our rosebushes. FML

#21307273
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28438) - you deserved it (2776)

On 11/28/2014 at 12:25am - misc - by mainlineloser (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I came home late from work. As I got out of my car, I noticed a child-shaped silhouette in my bedroom window. I almost shat myself, since I live alone. I searched the whole house, sobbing in fear, only to find no trace of whatever or whoever I'd seen. FML

#21306286
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38367) - you deserved it (3164)

On 11/26/2014 at 3:45pm - misc - by void bowels() { cry(); } (man) - United Kingdom (Caerphilly)

Today, I drove over an hour to my grandma's house for her birthday party. When she answered the door, her eyes went wide and she said angrily "No, not you!" and slammed the door shut in my face. FML

#21306195
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30890) - you deserved it (2657)

On 11/26/2014 at 1:13pm - misc - by unwanted (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, as I walked into the bank, I tripped and bumped into a security guard. He thought I was assaulting him, so he pinned me to the floor and called for backup as he held me at gunpoint. FML

#21305863
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32797) - you deserved it (2632)

On 11/25/2014 at 3:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my mom booked a family trip to Sweden. This would be great, if she hadn't asked me to tell our former German exchange student that we were coming to visit her in Germany. She was thrilled. Now I have to be the one to let her down. FML

#21305750
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27614) - you deserved it (2265)

On 11/25/2014 at 11:14am - misc - by Blöde Gans - United States (Florida)

Today, I was in a good mood for once and my professor looks at me and says, "I don't know what you ate for breakfast but you're really annoying today." FML

#21305482
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28600) - you deserved it (3230)

On 11/24/2014 at 10:25pm - work - by anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I decided to check out a dating site, when I stumbled across my ex wife's profile. She'd had it for four out of the five years of our marriage. And no, it didn't rate us as a good match. FML

#21305183
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30976) - you deserved it (3255)

On 11/24/2014 at 1:47pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I helped a very large elderly man, who thanked me and tried to hand me a dollar bill. I kindly told him, "We are not allowed to accept tips from customers." His reply was, "You're going to take this fucking money," and shoved it in my pocket. I'm now being written up for it. FML

#21304848
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33771) - you deserved it (2730)

On 11/23/2014 at 10:48pm - work - by justinmdent - United States (Missouri)

Today, I started to get horny while watching TV with my husband. I tried turning him on by telling him I wanted his cock. He cheerfully replied without looking away from the TV, "If only I gave a fuck, babe, if only I gave a fuck!" FML

#21304429
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40854) - you deserved it (5096)

On 11/23/2014 at 11:34am - intimacy - by 404: fuck not given (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I accidentally called my boss 'mom'. Now she is jokingly telling everyone that I'm the long-lost daughter she gave up for adoption, because she knew I'd be a failure. FML

#21304319
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30321) - you deserved it (3714)

On 11/23/2014 at 3:31am - work - by naladetet - United States (New Jersey)



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