Eivana

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Eivana

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EivanaEivana
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 16 February 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 62522
  • Number of comments : 301
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 60 posted

About Eivana : "I've been puking up embalming fluid for weeks."

"Ahh, the past. The only thing dead that smells good."

Eivana's page activity

Visits<b>greenfishbait</b> - the 06/28/2016 at 2:15am<b>fariss</b> - the 06/17/2016 at 1:18pm<b>herecomestheboom</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 4:51am<b>mr_dour</b> - the 05/15/2016 at 5:10am<b>max367</b> - the 04/26/2016 at 1:15am<b>Shay_Shay97</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 2:29am<b>mikotomisaki</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 3:04pm<b>thunderstoerms</b> - the 04/15/2016 at 3:32am<b>Sierra120</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 1:33pm<b>pinksb</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 1:49pm<b>gobiteme2</b> - the 03/02/2016 at 9:36pm<b>storethis</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 10:02pm<b>Incognico</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 2:13am<b>Rockinroyaltyx3</b> - the 02/24/2016 at 5:55pm<b>fangirlofthings</b> - the 02/23/2016 at 10:08am<b>JadeOmega</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 3:38pm<b>marisol180</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 1:42am<b>tiggerlover100</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 12:32am

Fucked!<b>Rockinroyaltyx3</b> - the 02/24/2016 at 11:55pm<b>PineappleTango12</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 3:10am<b>Xaian1</b> - the 10/27/2015 at 12:21pm<b>TransitLetum</b> - the 10/26/2015 at 9:38pm<b>StiffPvtParts</b> - the 10/26/2015 at 6:24pm<b>tiredofwaiting</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 4:15am<b>boultzboi</b> - the 10/04/2015 at 11:01pm<b>beeferjay</b> - the 09/16/2015 at 1:53am<b>brandonwong</b> - the 09/02/2015 at 10:20am<b>bubsenn</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 11:41pm<b>philsh94</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 1:51am<b>imkool136</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 12:07pm<b>AngusEcrivain</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 9:05am<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 3:46am<b>Miss_Mandi</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 6:45pm<b>trey600rr</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 1:50am<b>karacakal2</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 5:36pm<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 6:55am

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Eivana's favorite FMLs

Today, I broke up with the guy I was seeing because he has a bad temper. He refused to believe me and decided that the best way to prove me wrong was to completely destroy my newly built house, inside and out, while I was at work. FML

Today, I drove in heavy rain for the first time, by myself. I had been told to drive below the speed limit, and be extra careful of the cars around me. Nobody had told me about thunder scaring a cow that would then escape from the corral and hit my car. FML

by damaged / 11/03/2015 at 10:24pm / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, I learned the hard way that my boyfriend lied about getting a vasectomy before we met, in spite of knowing how phobic I am of pregnancy and kids. His defense? "I figured you'd change your mind someday, because all you chicks love babies." FML

by nocongratsneeded / 11/03/2015 at 10:23pm / United States (Michigan) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, during dinner, my boyfriend slowly walked up next to me, got on one knee, and in one movement pointed at my feet and shouted, "WHAT ARE THOSE?!" FML

by Wtf / 11/03/2015 at 5:06pm / Love

Today, at work, a customer told me that my teeth would make a very pretty necklace. FML

by LadyLou / 11/03/2015 at 6:42am / Australia / Work

Today, my husband got angry and stormed out of the house because he claims I wasn't pressing the buttons he told me to while playing Pokemon. FML

by I'm my husband's second mom / 11/03/2015 at 2:14am / United States (Tennessee) / Love

Today, after years of difficulty, I finally found the perfect shade of foundation that matches my ultra-pale complexion. It's called "Death Flesh." FML

by 2pale / 11/01/2015 at 1:22pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at the airport waiting for my flight to leave for Hawaii when I received an urgent call from my neighbour saying that my house had been broken into. After rushing home and missing my flight, I had to explain to the police that my house wasn't burgled, it was just very messy. FML

by Anonymous / 10/31/2015 at 12:41pm / United Kingdom (Sunderland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She got incredibly excited and started flapping her hands around. Then she suddenly went deadpan and said "But seriously... no." FML

by Anonymous / 10/31/2015 at 3:19am / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, my stomach growled so loud in class that a boy sitting next to me thought his phone had vibrated. FML

by qourt / 10/29/2015 at 11:21pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I decided it was time to have "the talk" with my daughter, after I found a thong in the washing machine. She denied it was hers and pointed out how it was too big to fit her. I ended up having a very different talk with my son. FML

by caroline / 10/29/2015 at 4:02pm / Germany / Kids

Today, I went to a costume contest as Jon Snow from Game of Thrones. I won, which was nice, until I was told that the only flaws in my "Samwell Tarly" outfit were my long hair and wrong sword. FML

by Fat Jon / 10/29/2015 at 3:43pm / Mexico (Distrito Federal) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got so desperate for cash that I decided to start selling my used panties online. FML

by Natasha / 10/29/2015 at 4:58am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up to the sound of footsteps outside my room. I investigated but found nothing. As I went back to my room, I heard a sort of giggling from inside. I was so scared, I grabbed my car keys, got the fuck out of there, and drove to my girlfriend's house in my pajamas. FML

by Anonymous / 10/28/2015 at 11:09am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was making a homemade pizza for myself. I've been unhappy lately, so I arranged the pepperoni in the shape of a smiley face to cheer myself up. The pizza burned. FML

by welp / 10/28/2015 at 12:11am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous