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Ebola's favorite FMLs
Today, I let my estranged husband move back in with my son and me. Later, his pregnant and underage girlfriend knocked on my door, crying about how her mom kicked her out. I'm such a pushover, they're in my bed and I'm on the couch. FML
by ishyboo / 02/27/2016 at 5:59pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Love
by Anonymous / 02/27/2016 at 6:17am / United States (Texas) / Work
by anonymous / 02/25/2016 at 4:55pm / United States / Health
by rangerluke / 02/25/2016 at 10:52am / United States (California) / Health
by 1meme129 / 02/24/2016 at 9:12am / United States (Colorado) / Kids
by arrow / 02/23/2016 at 3:39pm / United States (California) / Health
by Mr. X / 02/23/2016 at 12:46pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
by girlfromnowhere / 02/23/2016 at 6:06am / United Arab Emirates / Work
Today, I was at church with some friends and our counselor, who had recently came back from Taiwan. I was born there and love to visit, so I immediately exclaimed, "How lucky!" A few seconds of awkward silence later, he said, "I was visiting my dad who was just diagnosed with cancer." FML
by goodjobme / 02/23/2016 at 1:53am / United States (California) / Health
by Anonymous / 02/23/2016 at 12:01am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health
Today, my boss decided that, because I got dragged into a vacation that I didn't even want to go on, she was going to take a promotion back before she even gave it to me. I don't know what's worse, losing the promotion or going on that crappy vacation. FML
by Anonymous / 02/22/2016 at 10:14pm / United States (California) / Work
Today, my ex-girlfriend woke up from a coma that lasted a few months. Her parents called me from the hospital shortly after because she was in hysterics that I wasn't there. Apparently she thinks we're still together, and I now have to somehow break up with her again after almost a year apart. FML
by oh / 02/22/2016 at 9:41pm / United States (California) / Love
Today, I'm a car salesman. I got told to cold call a list of previous customers, but I recognised the names as I phoned them all last week; I told the manager this. He slammed his fist on my desk and told me to stop lying and do as I was told. I got told to "fuck off" 27 times. FML
by Arcam89 / 02/22/2016 at 5:37pm / United Kingdom (Edinburgh, City of) / Work
Today, I was in a car accident on the way to work. I called my boss and told him I had to deal with the police and the accident report and didn't know how long it would take. He got mad and said I "should have picked a better time to do this". FML
by Mycardoesn'tevenwork / 02/22/2016 at 3:16pm / United States / Transportation
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, I was eating my lunch. When I opened my mouth to eat a spoonful of rice, a bee flew right…