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Ebola

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Ebola
  • Town/Country : Washington DC, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3904
  • Number of comments : 47
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Ebola : I never know what to write.

26 years old

Undergrad in biochem
Masters in biotechnology

I'm a research scientist

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Ebola's favorite FMLs

Today, I was singing while driving through the car park. I blacked out trying to hit a high note, and ended up bashing into another car. FML

#21063366
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21554) - you deserved it (37667)

On 02/17/2014 at 12:43pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, my husband cracked a "rectum? damn near killed him" joke at my grandfather's funeral. He had genuinely spoken without thinking, but his quick gasp and "Oh shit" sounded quite sarcastic. We were both kicked out. My family thinks I put him up to the whole thing. FML

#21062405
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36547) - you deserved it (3839)

On 02/16/2014 at 12:30pm - misc - by shanti (woman) -

Today, my boss bitched me out on the sales floor for a good 10 minutes, because I wasn't "smiling the right way" for our customers. FML

#21062398
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36045) - you deserved it (3187)

On 02/16/2014 at 12:22pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, I needed to borrow money from my girlfriend. I went into her bag and pulled out the money all while a lady watched me open-mouthed. Turns out it wasn't my girlfriend's bag. It belonged to the lady watching me. FML

#21062237
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36084) - you deserved it (16193)

On 02/16/2014 at 7:56am - money - by anon - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)

Today, I was driving through the mountains and there was a chain requirement. I went to put them on and found a note where my chains used to be saying, "Have fun in a blizzard now bitch" from my ex. FML

#21062139
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38067) - you deserved it (5528)

On 02/16/2014 at 2:37am - misc - by snowlover (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I proudly informed my grandma that I now have a girlfriend. My grandpa overheard and said how surprising that was, given how expensive blowup dolls are. He and my grandma then both laughed out loud. FML

#21061712
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42104) - you deserved it (5376)

On 02/15/2014 at 6:14pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I told my husband how frisky I was feeling, and asked him what he was going to do about it. He reached into our fruit bowl, tossed me a banana and told me to work it out, then returned to his video game. FML

#21061692
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46461) - you deserved it (6256)

On 02/15/2014 at 5:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was grading work my students had done with a sub. I realized one student had gotten hold of the teachers' edition of the textbook when I read ten papers in a row that had "Student answers may vary" as the answer to problem number four. My students can't even cheat properly. FML

#21061154
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49052) - you deserved it (4610)

On 02/15/2014 at 2:11am - work - by chinaski7628 - United States (California)

Today, I opened up a snapchat from my best friend. I received a full and detailed view of her and her boyfriend having sex. All I wanted to know was how her Valentine's Day dinner went. FML

#21060866
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43849) - you deserved it (6692)

On 02/14/2014 at 10:21pm - intimacy - by waymoreiwanted (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, it was the first dress rehearsal at a community theater. I'm playing a grandma to a bunch of little kids, and the guy who is playing the grandpa wears a fat suit. I put on my costume and one of the kids comes up to me and says, "Are you wearing a fat suit too?" and pokes my stomach. FML

#21059569
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36604) - you deserved it (5817)

On 02/13/2014 at 10:16pm - misc - by EmmaleeSupertramp (woman) - United States

Today, I was out with my girlfriend at a club. As a slow dance began, a guy approached and asked, "May I cut in?" My girlfriend surprised me by saying, "Sure!" As I was about to protest, the guy cut me off and said, "Sorry miss, I was asking him." FML

#21059471
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44165) - you deserved it (5976)

On 02/13/2014 at 8:31pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, trying to be a responsible parent, I bought my daughter a pack of condoms in case she ever decided to have sex. She turned them into balloon animals and went back to playing video games. FML

#21059009
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29677) - you deserved it (45260)

On 02/13/2014 at 10:47am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, in the very middle of the night, my kitten started rubbing against my face. Thinking I saw her face in the darkness, I decided to kiss her before going back to bed. My lips made contact with her butthole. FML

#21058991
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45015) - you deserved it (15886)

On 02/13/2014 at 10:20am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, I walked into my house with a couple of friends and I saw my girlfriend doing laundry. I jokingly asked her if she had time to do a load of mine as well. She scoffed and said, "Yeah babe, I'll gladly do your laundry... The same day you learn to wipe properly." FML

#21058908
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21071) - you deserved it (46367)

On 02/13/2014 at 7:43am - love - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, the boy who sits next to me in class accidentally dropped his sketch pad. It turns out he's really talented at drawing portraits. They're so good that I could recognize myself in all of them. FML

#21058436
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43522) - you deserved it (6485)

On 02/12/2014 at 8:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)



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Thursday 10 April 2014

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