About Ebola : you don't want to know
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You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
Ebola's favorite FMLs
Today, like everyday, I got on the train heading back from my university campus in Preston. Usually, it takes 20 minutes. When I sat down, I realised it was a non-stop service to Glasgow and the doors had closed. It took me 7 hours by train and a lift from my best friend at 2 a.m. to get home. FML
by Mintilou / 04/07/2016 at 11:17pm / United Kingdom (Sandwell) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 04/06/2016 at 2:18pm / Netherlands (Noord-Brabant) / Work
by stuckass / 04/05/2016 at 5:02am / Pakistan / Work
Today, I noticed that both my managers completely ignored me when I told them that I'm fully booked, and can't take any more clients. Both of them scheduled additional clients. At the same. Three people from different companies will show up at my office at the same time. Yep. FML
by O / 04/03/2016 at 11:38pm / Sweden (Vastra Gotaland) / Work
by now afraid... / 04/03/2016 at 1:28pm / United States (Illinois) / Love
by emi / 04/03/2016 at 1:18pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy
Today, I asked my mom if she wanted to go wedding dress shopping with me today. She reluctantly said, "I guess". I showered, shaved and did my hair and makeup. When I came downstairs, she hadn't even brushed her teeth yet. "I'm just lacking motivation to go," she said. Glad you're so excited too. FML
by NotTheFavoriteChild / 04/03/2016 at 12:53pm / Love
by ktpnothappening / 04/03/2016 at 12:03pm / United States (South Carolina) / Love
Today, I took my boyfriend of 2 years on a family vacation to meet my family for the first time. We all got really drunk and he made out with my dad. This was day one and we don't fly back for another 16 days. FML
by Anonymous / 04/02/2016 at 1:48pm / United States (Oregon) / Holidays
Today, the coach bus I was riding almost crashed. I was using the restroom at the time. The bus braked so hard, I peed all over the wall and splashed my shirt. Nobody wanted to sit anywhere near me after that. FML
by Anonymous / 04/02/2016 at 9:38am / United States / Transportation
by Anonymous / 04/02/2016 at 5:23am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 04/01/2016 at 5:06pm / United States (California) / Kids
Today, the mentally-challenged teen who sometimes comes into my restaurant gave me a hug as usual. I thought it was sweet, until a coworker let me know he immediately goes and jacks off in the bathroom after. FML
by sadfantasy / 03/31/2016 at 2:00am / Canada (Ontario) / Work
by Anonymous / 03/29/2016 at 11:37pm / United States (Virginia) / Love
Today, I put up a sign asking motorcyclists to slow down near horses, as the noise can spook them. While I was riding near the sign, a biker slowed to read it, looked at me, then revved his engine loudly and raced off. My horse bucked me off into some brambles and bolted. FML
by BriarFace / 03/28/2016 at 9:56pm / United States (Virginia) / Animals
- Today, I was jerking off in the train washroom when the ticket inspector knocked at the door. I was… Today, I set my alarm half-an-hour earlier so I could masturbate. That's how horny and single I am.… Today, I discovered that my Facebook profile picture, of me between my boyfriend and a friend, is…