Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Eaglestrike117

Search for a member

Eaglestrike117
  • Town/Country : USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 18828
  • Number of comments : 188
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Eaglestrike117's last visitors

laurenalexis09star14394umidontremberalexmac222Hiimhaileypotterinfinitegracethe_glitcherMindy72387simplysarcasticsburgerkingakalittlexlune

Eaglestrike117's FML badges

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

See all of Eaglestrike117's badges

Eaglestrike117's favorite FMLs

Today, two Jehovah's Witnesses rang my doorbell for the 10th time. This time they asked me whether I knew Faith's greatest enemy. I replied, "Basic reasoning?" A copy of The Watchtower can really hurt when it hits you in the eye. FML

#17468167
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30032) - you deserved it (8711)

On 08/14/2011 at 7:20am - misc - by Goaway (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I found a very large pumpkin super-glued to my car. It will not come off. FML

#16943359
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30575) - you deserved it (2965)

On 07/02/2011 at 12:46am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I stopped to help a stranded motorist. I yelled out my window, "Hey do you need a hand?" The guy was just standing beside his car taking a piss. FML

#16355450
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24759) - you deserved it (5946)

On 05/26/2011 at 10:06am - misc - by Emoney1 - Canada

Today, my toilet decided it wouldn't take any more shit from me, and flooded the bathroom. FML

#16299538
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31248) - you deserved it (4718)

On 05/22/2011 at 4:31pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

­Today, my dog decided to fly through the front door like Superman. All 180lbs of her promptly slammed sideways into the wall, putting a dog-sized hole in the plaster. FML

#15726248
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23064) - you deserved it (3224)

On 04/10/2011 at 3:32pm - animals - by a man - United States (Tennessee)

Today, on the way home from the dog groomer, my great Dane had a bout of diarrhea in the car. I slammed on the brakes and my other freshly shampooed dog slid off the seat and into the pile of crap. FML

#15510596
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23604) - you deserved it (7682)

On 03/27/2011 at 6:06am - animals - by StinkyDogs (man) - United States (California)

Today, in an attempt to get my son to stop playing Call of Duty, I threw his Xbox controller out the window. He was so desperate, he followed it. His bedroom is on the second floor. My son has 3 broken ribs, and no future. FML

#15405912
494 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33483) - you deserved it (47512)

On 03/20/2011 at 9:25pm - kids - by failureparent (man) - United States (California)

Today, I showed my colleagues how I could switch on my webcam at home from the office. That's how we all found out my wife is cheating on me. FML

#15309756
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (99677) - you deserved it (5896) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/14/2011 at 5:26pm - love - by Albert06 - France

Today, I took a busy train into the city. I was lucky enough to get a seat. People were forced to stand in the aisle in front of me, and the person directly opposite me, whose butt was level with my head farted in my face. Twice. FML

#15112625
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26640) - you deserved it (3665)

On 02/25/2011 at 8:25am - misc - by WhatsThatSmell (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I threw my brand new iPhone 4 in the air whilst laying on my bed. It came down, went through my fingers, landed on my balls, then broke on the concrete floor. FML

#15045692
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8658) - you deserved it (67485)

On 02/19/2011 at 9:03pm - misc - by breakinphones - United States (Arizona)

Today, while in my room sleeping, my little brother deemed it necessary to come in and drop a book on my face. When I sat up with a now bloody nose, he looked at me, pointed, and said "You've just been facebooked" and ran away giggling. FML

#14806356
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38014) - you deserved it (7386)

On 02/02/2011 at 12:57am - kids - by Malakai - United States

Today, I wrote a mental note: don't tell a couple of nuns that you used black magic to fix their computer. Then don't tell the story to your boss just as the nuns walk back in again. Then don't say "speak of the devil" to them. FML

#14647834
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8893) - you deserved it (30539)

On 01/20/2011 at 5:55am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my boss decided to post a photo of a piece of crap on Facebook. He tagged me in it. FML

#14500845
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23814) - you deserved it (3535)

On 01/07/2011 at 8:31pm - work - by poop (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was getting ready for the school swimming carnival and was running very late. I reached for my deodorant and sprayed it on. It was only when I was at the pool that I realized I had accidentally grabbed the spray tan and covered my underarms in it. FML

#13862354
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8361) - you deserved it (21799)

On 11/16/2010 at 5:07am - misc - by huulo -

Today, I found out that my 43 year old wife has been having a cyber relationship with a 14 year old kid on Halo. FML

#13589464
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37774) - you deserved it (3751)

On 10/25/2010 at 12:24pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: