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Eaglestrike117

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Eaglestrike117
  • Town/Country : USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 18800
  • Number of comments : 188
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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Eaglestrike117's FML badges

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

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Eaglestrike117's favorite FMLs

Today, I caught my mother attempting to write a $1400 cheque. To whom? The proprietor of a "Christian charity fund" with whom she had been having Internet conversations. The proprietor's name, and that on the cheque, was "Herp McDerpington". FML

#18540980
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28305) - you deserved it (2177)

On 12/18/2011 at 12:18am - misc - by scammed - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my five-year-old daughter told me she was going to throw up. I told her to rush to the bathroom. I followed her a few seconds later, only to find her sitting on the toilet and vomiting onto the floor. FML

#18534964
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28478) - you deserved it (5529) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/17/2011 at 10:42am - kids - by espylone - France

Today, my dog took a dump beside the air intake for our furnace. The house now smells like dog crap. FML

#18457240
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19931) - you deserved it (3420)

On 12/07/2011 at 11:27pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, he farted. He blamed it on a "nearby frog." FML

#18320267
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28016) - you deserved it (5013)

On 11/22/2011 at 8:00pm - intimacy - by Gabriela -

Today, I was getting intimate with my husband on our anniversary day. He climbed on top of me and firmly placed his penis on my nose. When I asked him what the hell he was doing, he burst into laughter and said I looked just like Squidward. FML

#18083202
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34146) - you deserved it (3973)

On 10/26/2011 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, one of the children at my daycare came up to me and bit me on the face. He laughed so hard at my scream, that he threw up in my lap. FML

#18072283
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31409) - you deserved it (2623)

On 10/25/2011 at 2:04pm - kids - by mew - Canada

Today, my five-year-old daughter came home from school. It was cold and she was very tired. I said, "Take off your socks and blow your nose." She took off her socks and blew her nose into them. FML

#18044688
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20818) - you deserved it (16041) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/22/2011 at 8:40am - kids - by titoutou222 - France

Today, I was relaxing at home while my boyfriend played with his hamster. After a while of silence, my boyfriend came over and put his fingers next to my face. Trying to be cute, I stuck his fingers in my mouth and sucked on them. Turns out he was trying to show me how bad hamster pee smells. FML

#18043699
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16213) - you deserved it (46478)

On 10/22/2011 at 2:10am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I ran into an old friend. I asked her how she was doing, then asked, "And your mum?" Just as the words escaped my lips, I remembered her mum died a few years ago. Trying to save face, I messed up again and blurted, "She still in the same graveyard?" FML

#18041933
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15441) - you deserved it (43157) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/21/2011 at 10:09pm - misc - by Virginiedetibo - France

Today, while at my job as a hostess, I was seating a couple and their adorable little girl. I tried to ask how old she was, but what came out was, "Aww, what breed is she?" FML

#18039986
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15113) - you deserved it (28072)

On 10/21/2011 at 5:27pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, there was a guy following me, so to avoid him, I crouched down and basically waddled behind a wall to get past him. Sure enough, first thing I see when I get around the corner, while still waddling, was an unhappy midget couple staring right at me. FML

#17894609
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24707) - you deserved it (4980)

On 10/03/2011 at 8:37am - misc - by Mike Polk - United States

Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML

#17767423
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24032) - you deserved it (6478)

On 09/17/2011 at 9:20pm - kids - by awesomekidsmum - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was eating noodles. Midway through chewing, I sneezed. The noodles got stuck in my nose. FML

#17718779
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26246) - you deserved it (3504)

On 09/11/2011 at 11:15am - health - by bob - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I went into a public bathroom and walked in on a guy checking his butt out in the mirror to see if he'd wiped properly. FML

#17541030
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25580) - you deserved it (1769)

On 08/21/2011 at 8:03pm - misc - by Bobby ray slice - United States (Minnesota)

Today, the guy at Subway asked if I wanted to make my sandwich a footlong. I'm not sure what came over me, but before I realized what I was saying, I'd told him that I couldn't handle 12 inches. FML

#17470290
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24308) - you deserved it (9032)

On 08/14/2011 at 1:44pm - misc - by Username - United States (New York)



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