EMTchic

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EMTchic

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Sunday 14 April 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 47083
  • Number of comments : 179
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 15 posted

About EMTchic : -My name is Mandi. I'm 17. I'm going to the Paul Mitchell School of Cosmetology for my degree in cosmetology.
-I am engaged to the most amazing guy ever
-I LOVE PANDAS!
-I love having pets! I currently have a Shih-Tzu/Lhasa-Apsa mix (her name is Ash) and a tabby kitten (her name is Tigger).
-I love Star Wars, Harry Potter, and Lord of the Rings
-I love the trilogy Matched, Crossed, and Reached by Ally Condie
-My favourite band is Escape The Fate =)
-I try to be funny but some people find me overly sarcastic and annoying. If you find that you don't like how I comment, then feel free to thumb me down.
-I am a bit of a grammar nazi, and I am big on respect. Please don't take it the wrong way if I ever jump on you about something, some people/stuff just get(s) on my nerves.
-Perdix, FMLshark and DocBastard are my FML idols.

EMTchic's page activity

Visits<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 11:22am<b>sloosh</b> - the 04/05/2016 at 1:06am<b>am1717</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 6:21pm<b>bananajoe666</b> - the 02/28/2016 at 2:55am<b>Supaviper</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 6:23am<b>SamW2469</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 4:58pm<b>Altairae</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 12:49pm<b>jill97</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 2:23am<b>Dalboz</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 8:28am<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 8:44pm<b>jamaarlove</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 5:32am<b>Role448</b> - the 12/31/2015 at 10:37am<b>Princess_Eevee9</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 7:32pm<b>TeddW</b> - the 12/11/2015 at 8:15am<b>Tezoma</b> - the 12/09/2015 at 5:50pm<b>RavingHaven</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 2:45pm<b>velestro</b> - the 11/18/2015 at 6:28pm<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 11/12/2015 at 9:59pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 5:22pm<b>SamW2469</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 10:56pm<b>ToxicTyrael</b> - the 10/03/2015 at 10:42pm<b>martin8337</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 12:04pm

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EMTchic's favorite FMLs

Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML

by tinypenis / 06/04/2013 at 8:15am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to pee in my cat's litter box, just to avoid witnessing my mom having sex in the living room on my way to the bathroom. FML

by Anonymous / 06/03/2013 at 1:47am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, feeling the need to spice things up in our sex life, I dressed up in my husband's navy uniform jacket, hat, and a pair of heels. When he came into the room, he took one look at me and started laughing uncontrollably. FML

by anonymous / 06/03/2013 at 12:41am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, I finished a big art project. It was a self-portrait done in acrylics. Proud of my piece, I showed my mom. After some thought her first comment was, "well, I'm either going to insult your art or your face." FML

by Anonymous / 06/01/2013 at 7:43am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was making love to my fiancée, when she dug her nails into my back and told me to "choke" her like I did last night. I was at work last night. FML

by Anonymous / 06/01/2013 at 3:51am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined, and I had to stand and watch in morbid fascination as the man behind me kindly paid for my purchase. His reason was "God forbid a maxed out Visa should get in the way of fucking." FML

by Samprib / 06/01/2013 at 1:09am / United States (Indiana) / Intimacy

Today, at karate, my sparring partner thought it was completely okay to surprise kick me in the vagina. When he saw me doubled over in pain, he was completely surprised. Apparently, he thought that it wouldn't hurt, because I have no penis. FML

by Mayyouneverfindpleasureinavagina / 06/01/2013 at 12:31am / United States (California) / Health

Today, at the supermarket, an old lady asked for directions to the produce aisle. Having read way too many stories lately on this very site about awful elderly folks, I was wary, but helped her out. She gave me an awkward hug in thanks, lifting my wallet in the process, as I later found out. FML

by speechless / 05/31/2013 at 8:50pm / United Kingdom (Wirral) / Money

Today, I was sending some dirty texts to my boyfriend, when I heard a knocking sound coming through the wall. I sat there for ten minutes before I realized I was listening to my mom and her boyfriend having sex. FML

by Anonymous / 05/31/2013 at 8:02pm / Guatemala (Guatemala) / Intimacy

Today, I had to set parental controls on my iPad so my dad couldn't watch dirty videos on Youtube. FML

by Anonymous / 05/31/2013 at 12:20am / United States (Tennessee) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend "finally figured out" that he couldn't possibly be the father of my child, and publicly broke up with me. When I reminded him that I was already pregnant when we first met, he "extra" broke up with me for making him look stupid. FML

by Anonymous / 05/30/2013 at 11:28pm / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old son covering my nose and mouth with his hand and complaining, "Noooo, you need to die now." FML

by life insurance for 1 / 05/30/2013 at 12:29pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I uttered the phrase "the pot calling the kettle black" in class. Moments later, I'd been called a "racist twerp" and kicked out of class by the same English teacher who once tried to have another kid suspended for using the word "titillate", because apparently it's "pornographic". FML

by Anonymous / 05/30/2013 at 11:20am / United Kingdom (Northamptonshire) / Love

Today, I found shit on my windshield. I'm not sure if it is human or animal, but it was conveniently smeared all over and even more was placed under my wipers just in case I used them to clean it up. This isn't the first time, and I have no idea who I could have pissed off. FML

by windshitwipers / 05/30/2013 at 5:41am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that me having a boyfriend is an on-going family joke. FML

by I'm a joke? / 05/30/2013 at 1:37am / Love