Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

EMTchic

Search for a member

EMTchic

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Sunday 14 April 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 18973
  • Number of comments : 179
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 15 posted

About EMTchic : -My name is Mandi. I'm 17. I'm going to the Paul Mitchell School of Cosmetology for my degree in cosmetology.
-I am engaged to the most amazing guy ever
-I LOVE PANDAS!
-I love having pets! I currently have a Shih-Tzu/Lhasa-Apsa mix (her name is Ash) and a tabby kitten (her name is Tigger).
-I love Star Wars, Harry Potter, and Lord of the Rings
-I love the trilogy Matched, Crossed, and Reached by Ally Condie
-My favourite band is Escape The Fate =)
-I try to be funny but some people find me overly sarcastic and annoying. If you find that you don't like how I comment, then feel free to thumb me down.
-I am a bit of a grammar nazi, and I am big on respect. Please don't take it the wrong way if I ever jump on you about something, some people/stuff just get(s) on my nerves.
-Perdix, FMLshark and DocBastard are my FML idols.

EMTchic's page activity

Visits<b>Indianboy9321</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 12:29pm<b>crashk13</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 10:45pm<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 9:48pm<b>manchesterUK</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 3:07pm<b>Jenra</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 3:09am<b>goldengirlsfan</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 10:32am<b>skilova4lifezzz</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 1:37am<b>penashmul</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 11:20pm<b>derp_taco</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 11:31pm<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 5:17pm<b>Gemma_Mansonite</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 1:43pm<b>Benjaminkamp</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 9:45am<b>roadie42</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 1:05pm<b>YingHing</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 12:30am<b>hofferman</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 1:23am<b>delhh</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 11:45am<b>xx_ginny</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 4:53pm<b>aeore</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 8:44am

EMTchic's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of EMTchic's badges

EMTchic's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I watched the new movie "The Purge." After the movie, I jokingly asked him that if the U.S. had such a purge in real life, would he participate, and who would he kill first. Without missing a beat, he said, "you." FML

#20714140
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41091) - you deserved it (8069)

On 06/08/2013 at 7:43pm - misc - by purged (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my 21-year-old girlfriend finally got the courage to tell her mom that she wanted to move in with me. It turns out she was right to be afraid; during the talk, her mother yelled at us, calling her a slut and saying she was too young to be "shacking up with some guy." FML

#20714116
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41735) - you deserved it (5545)

On 06/08/2013 at 7:26pm - love - by MonsterInLaw (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, at work, a customer came in and ordered a "Butterbeer Frappuccino." When I said we serve no such thing, she yelled at me for "lying" to her, saying she knew about our "secret menu." She ended up complaining to my manager and demanded that he fire me. FML

#20714023
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51043) - you deserved it (3859)

On 06/08/2013 at 6:20pm - work - by I hate my job (woman) - United States

Today, after discovering that our son is already sexually active, I asked my husband to have a talk with him. "Remember, son, it's all about the clit", wasn't what I had in mind. FML

#20713183
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60922) - you deserved it (13811)

On 06/08/2013 at 6:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to get intimate for the first time. He said he didn't want to use a condom, and that I should just give him one of my birth control pills instead, "so we can still be just as safe". What the hell? FML

#20712090
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66778) - you deserved it (9225)

On 06/07/2013 at 5:20pm - intimacy - by what the fuck (woman) - United Kingdom (Ealing)

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. She pulled down my trousers, saw my Poke-ball boxers, and absolutely lost it. I had to lie next to her in bed for the next 10 minutes hearing her howl with laughter while crying "Dickachu, I choose you!" FML

#20711208
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55074) - you deserved it (64188)

On 06/07/2013 at 3:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, after having spent years staying in school, working hard to achieve good grades, and avoiding all the bad kids, my mom accused me of having no direction in life and complained about how I haven't given her a grandchild yet. I'm 19. FML

#20710020
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52394) - you deserved it (2947)

On 06/06/2013 at 4:51pm - misc - by luciazee (woman) - Peru (Lima)

Today, my little sister was scared to sleep alone, so my parents made her sleep in bed with me. I barely slept, due to the utter terror of waking up to her chanting into my ear in a low whisper, "This is where you die, this is where you die..." FML

#20709788
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50793) - you deserved it (3470)

On 06/06/2013 at 2:47pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Isle of Man

Today, I saw a man on my bike that was stolen a few years ago. I asked him if I could have my bike back just wondering what he'd say. He calmly replied, "Hell no, I stole this fair and square." FML

#20708788
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56050) - you deserved it (6006)

On 06/06/2013 at 12:14am - misc - by anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend of six days proposed to me. FML

#20708141
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (80633) - you deserved it (11153)

On 06/05/2013 at 7:11pm - love - by The Clitshank Redemption (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, the crazy son of a bitch who lives next door to me once again got into a loud, rather one-sided argument with his cat. 20 minutes later, he knocked on my door, asking if he could stay at my place for a couple of days. The look he gave me when I said no has me fearing for my life. FML

#20708003
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53374) - you deserved it (4047)

On 06/05/2013 at 6:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, my fiancée told me that she wants us to have an open marriage. She reasons that since she doesn't equate sex with love, there's no logical reason for me to be against her having sex with other people. FML

Today, my wife uttered the soul-crushing words, "But we're married now, why would we have sex?" FML

#20706140
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84813) - you deserved it (8094)

On 06/04/2013 at 8:08pm - intimacy - by ._. (man) - United Kingdom (Bedfordshire)

Today, I took a dump in the woods at a secluded lake. I used the leaves of a seemingly harmless tree to clean myself. However, I was unaware that the leaf was poisonous. It feels like a thousand hornets are attacking my ass-crack. FML

#20705435
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32755) - you deserved it (48017)

On 06/04/2013 at 1:15pm - health - by poisonivyretard (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: