EMTchic

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EMTchic

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Sunday 14 April 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 49798
  • Number of comments : 179
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 15 posted

About EMTchic : -My name is Mandi. I'm 17. I'm going to the Paul Mitchell School of Cosmetology for my degree in cosmetology.
-I am engaged to the most amazing guy ever
-I LOVE PANDAS!
-I love having pets! I currently have a Shih-Tzu/Lhasa-Apsa mix (her name is Ash) and a tabby kitten (her name is Tigger).
-I love Star Wars, Harry Potter, and Lord of the Rings
-I love the trilogy Matched, Crossed, and Reached by Ally Condie
-My favourite band is Escape The Fate =)
-I try to be funny but some people find me overly sarcastic and annoying. If you find that you don't like how I comment, then feel free to thumb me down.
-I am a bit of a grammar nazi, and I am big on respect. Please don't take it the wrong way if I ever jump on you about something, some people/stuff just get(s) on my nerves.
-Perdix, FMLshark and DocBastard are my FML idols.

EMTchic's page activity

Visits<b>tatteredshirt</b> - the 09/11/2016 at 1:17pm<b>bolee997</b> - the 08/30/2016 at 12:48am<b>EastCoastLez</b> - the 08/18/2016 at 3:07pm<b>Miss_Whipped</b> - the 08/05/2016 at 5:25pm<b>Nathan_Henry</b> - the 07/16/2016 at 1:39am<b>optimusic</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 8:49pm<b>Mikelbair1</b> - the 06/01/2016 at 11:15am<b>Allornone</b> - the 05/30/2016 at 10:04pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 11:22am<b>sloosh</b> - the 04/05/2016 at 1:06am<b>am1717</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 6:21pm<b>bananajoe666</b> - the 02/28/2016 at 2:55am<b>Supaviper</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 6:23am<b>SamW2469</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 4:58pm<b>Altairae</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 12:49pm<b>jill97</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 2:23am<b>Dalboz</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 8:28am<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 8:44pm

Fucked!<b>Allornone</b> - the 05/31/2016 at 4:05am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 5:22pm<b>SamW2469</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 10:56pm<b>ToxicTyrael</b> - the 10/03/2015 at 10:42pm<b>martin8337</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 12:04pm

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EMTchic's favorite FMLs

Today, as part of my veterinary degree, I had to demonstrate how to jerk off a dog in front of my entire class. Afterwards, the lecturer said that I have the 'magic touch'. FML

by vet1 / 07/11/2013 at 11:18am / South Africa (Gauteng) / Work

Today, my 13-year-old daughter and I went to a tropical themed restaurant. She wanted a strawberry Daiquiri, so I asked the waitress for a virgin strawberry Daiquiri. My daughter then said, "But dad, I'm not a virgin." FML

by Anonymous / 07/11/2013 at 10:24am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I came home at 1am to find my mom sitting on my couch, ranting about how I'm not supposed to stay up this late. I'm 26 and I don't know how she got into my house. FML

by whowhat / 07/11/2013 at 2:26am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my 15-year-old birth daughter asked if I've ever had sex. FML

by Anonymous / 07/10/2013 at 12:38pm / United States (Ohio) / Kids

Today, while having a serious talk with my father, he said, "Son, you're only alive because of a faulty, off-brand condom." FML

by my honest father / 07/10/2013 at 12:33pm / United States (Kansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, while ironing some shirts, my cat decided to hop up and investigate. To prevent him from burning himself, I instinctively moved the iron away and placed it flat on my other hand. FML

by kutekittykatz / 07/10/2013 at 4:58am / South Africa (Gauteng) / Animals

Today, I got a message from my brother on Facebook that read, "They're watching you." This wouldn't have been such a big deal if he hadn't been dead for two years. FML

by Wtf / 07/10/2013 at 1:24am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to my local pool. I lay down in a chair and started tanning. About 30 minutes later, a lady came up to me and said, "Put that away, you pervert, there are children here!" I had a hole in my pants and my penis had started to poke through. FML

by Anonymous / 07/09/2013 at 12:07pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I were out cliff jumping, when for the first time, he told me he loved me. I panicked and pushed him over the edge and into the water. He's now in hospital. FML

by Erica / 07/08/2013 at 1:27pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, while at the doctor's, a week overdue with my first child, I was told that sex and orgasms can sometimes help to induce labor. On the way home, my boyfriend asked for road head, arguing that "She said that stuff about orgasms." Not you, honey. FML

by realitybites / 07/08/2013 at 1:03pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my five-year-old daughter called the police to report her stolen nose. FML

by nosestealer / 07/07/2013 at 5:57pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I realized that I am such a Grammar Nazi that when a porn star says something grammatically-incorrect, I lose my boner. FML

by BlueB / 07/06/2013 at 11:42am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I went over my girlfriend of 3 months' house for the first time. As we walked through the door, I was greeted by a little girl whose first words to me were, "Are you my daddy?" FML

by walker / 07/06/2013 at 12:17am / United States / Love

Today, as I was enjoying a nice fish salad, my father looked me dead in the eyes and said, "Ahh, salmon. The 'other' pink meat", then winked suggestively at my mother. I don't think I can ever eat fish again. FML

by ugh / 07/04/2013 at 2:28pm / South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal) / Intimacy

Today, at the doctor's, I had lots of papers to fill out so my boyfriend offered to help. We submitted them and the doctor called me a few minutes later. Under disorders my boyfriend had written, "Major cock craving disorder." The doctor couldn't stop giggling. FML

by Never Going Back To The Doctor / 07/04/2013 at 3:03am / United States / Intimacy