Dthnte

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Offline (the 09/29/2014 at 7:46pm)

Dthnte

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 9 January 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1459
  • Number of comments : 38
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Dthnte : I love science, I'm a prospective medical student. I also like cats a lot.

Dthnte's page activity

Visits<b>maddiecat</b> - the 04/11/2016 at 11:58am<b>moosemanjinkurs</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 4:42am<b>MadameMacabre</b> - the 10/21/2015 at 4:23am<b>BlazeArmy</b> - the 10/09/2015 at 5:09pm<b>munuxi</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 8:58am<b>wdin</b> - the 05/26/2015 at 7:19pm<b>SilkMudah</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 2:56pm<b>WellThatWasRude</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 11:47am<b>why_teh_hell</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 7:41am<b>Celeden</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 11:01pm<b>Wondermage</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 3:38pm<b>JustForRetorts</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 4:23pm<b>garage</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 1:18pm<b>Fidge86</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 5:46pm<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 12:13pm<b>DragonDude</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 6:03am<b>dafuck_15</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 9:53am<b>ForbiddenDestiny</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 3:31am

Dthnte's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Dthnte's badges

Dthnte's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a nightmare in which I was haunted by the ghost of my foreskin. I then spent the whole day moping around, wondering what my life would've been like if my parents hadn't opted to slice it off. Will I see you in heaven, long-lost ghostly foreskin? FML

by MissYouPieceOfSkin / 11/27/2013 at 3:44am / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, I broke my tooth nearly in half. On a completely unrelated note, the Jew's Harp is my new least-favorite instrument. FML

by Blaphlafagus / 10/31/2013 at 9:16pm / United States (Texas) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while cleaning my ears with Q-tips, I came in my pants. FML

by ANON / 08/13/2013 at 7:53pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my five-year-old daughter called the police to report her stolen nose. FML

by nosestealer / 07/07/2013 at 5:57pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, my grandma's new dildo arrived in the mail. We buried her yesterday. FML

by hinting / 06/17/2013 at 12:43pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, my husband of 3 years learned that he's going to be a father. No, I'm not pregnant. FML

by Anonymous / 06/15/2013 at 12:28am / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, my boyfriend dumped me, accusing me of lying to him about "being a hermaphrodite". His almost total lack of knowledge about female anatomy led him to believe that my clitoris is actually an extremely tiny penis. FML

by Hannah / 06/13/2013 at 12:19pm / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy

Today, my mother came into my workplace to wail on me for "ruining our family's reputation" because I got a girl pregnant. I've been married to the "girl" for 8 years. FML

by Anonymous / 06/11/2013 at 10:12pm / United States / Kids

Today, after years of researching and saving money, I got a pet fox. I was able to enjoy the majesty of the animal for three hours before it burrowed under the fence and ran away. FML

by SadFoxLady / 06/10/2013 at 2:01pm / United States (Iowa) / Animals

Today, I went to the local pharmacy to buy some condoms. When I went to go purchase them, the elderly lady behind the counter took one look at me and said, "Honey, you're your own birth control." FML

by Anonymous / 06/09/2013 at 10:29am / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was delivering pizza. When I went up to the front door, an elderly lady answered. She was wearing a floral dress that went down to her shins and had a Nicolas Cage mask on with eye holes cut out. When I glanced behind her, I saw her cats had them too. FML

by nicholascageonyourface / 06/09/2013 at 1:13am / United States (Nebraska) / Miscellaneous

Today, at my new job at a funeral home, my boss threatened to fire me if I didn't "lighten the hell up" while dealing with our grieving clients. FML

by :( / 06/06/2013 at 7:37pm / United States / Work

Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined, and I had to stand and watch in morbid fascination as the man behind me kindly paid for my purchase. His reason was "God forbid a maxed out Visa should get in the way of fucking." FML

by Samprib / 06/01/2013 at 1:09am / United States (Indiana) / Intimacy

Today, my math teacher raged at a student for eating an apple in class. As he yelled at the student, he slapped the apple out of his hand and right into my face. Everyone laughed, including the teacher. FML

by WTFruits / 05/29/2013 at 2:29pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was walking down the stairs with my guitar in hand, singing "I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing" to my wife. I sang, "I don't wanna close my eyes, I don't wanna fall". Before I could say "asleep", I fell down the stairs. My wife almost pissed her pants laughing. My bum hurts. FML

by Anonymous / 05/28/2013 at 12:37pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Love