Dracs

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Dracs

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 926
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Dracs's page activity

Visits<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 01/05/2016 at 3:01am<b>dcs00</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 2:20pm<b>Fatwahhh</b> - the 03/10/2014 at 8:02am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:51pm<b>raphanne</b> - the 08/03/2011 at 9:51am<b>CorinnaHEY</b> - the 04/02/2011 at 12:53am<b>chalkdust</b> - the 02/27/2011 at 5:58pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 9:13am<b>Lisa_Gaskarth</b> - the 11/17/2010 at 12:35pm<b>Evii</b> - the 10/30/2010 at 2:37pm<b>stronghand0331</b> - the 10/28/2010 at 9:28pm<b>iwasrlybored</b> - the 10/12/2010 at 2:18am

Dracs's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Dracs's favorite FMLs

Today, I saw my boyfriend shaving his pubic hair before we had sex. This would be fine, except he was saying "Nom nom nom, I eat cock hairs" to his electric razor. FML

by Anonymous / 10/17/2010 at 1:55am / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy

Today, I asked my boyfriend in a sexy way "What should we do now, honey?" He answered, "Suck my dick?" I said "I was thinking of something more... romantic." He replied "Suck my dick in the moonlight?" FML

by Anonymous / 10/13/2010 at 9:20am / Spain (Asturias) / Intimacy

Today, I found out my older brother put tanning lotion in the lotion I use to masturbate with. Now I have orange palms and an orange penis which won't go away for weeks. FML

by caughtorangehanded / 10/01/2010 at 6:12pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, when I stopped at a light, I tossed a banana peel into a field along the side of the road. The man behind me got out of his car, picked up the banana peel and threw it back into my car at me. When I tried to tell him it was biodegradable, he told me to "stop making up words." FML

by Anonymous / 10/01/2010 at 9:47am / United Kingdom / Transportation

Today, as I was leaving the office, I heard my very cute coworker behind me say "Hey gorgeous, where are you off to?" I turned around with a smile and said "About to hit up happy hour." He was on the phone with his wife. I'm calling in sick tomorrow. FML

by Anonymous / 10/01/2010 at 7:48am / United States (Washington) / Work

Today, I got the guts to call my dad for the first time in nine years. He said he "almost didn't remember" he "had another daughter." Another? FML

by T / 10/01/2010 at 5:09am / Miscellaneous

Today, my five year old daughter was watching cartoons on TV. Then a Barbie commercial came on. My daughter sang along with the theme song "Be who you want to be, B-A-R-B-I-E." She then turned to me and said "Mom, I want to be a hooker." FML

by ....... / 06/23/2009 at 1:56pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, my son said, "Mommy, sometimes my pee-pee goes up like a stick." I replied, "Well, honey, that's normal and okay." I then asked when it happens, to which he said, "Well, sometimes when watching Scooby Doo and Shaggy comes out dressed in lady clothes." FML

by ScoobieDoo / 03/20/2009 at 12:15am / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

by offbeans / 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm / United States (California) / Kids