About Doxy : Why hello there stranger.
-In my next life I wanna be a jellyfish
-Or a penguin, either is cool
-I'm a procrastinator
-I like to find complicated or fancy words to use in essays and conversations to show off and annoy people
-I love History
-I love shoving historical facts in people's faces when they annoy me or are being stupid
- I can be a real diva sometimes
-I can be a real drama queen sometimes
-I like grammar nazis
-I'm lazy
-That's why I won't complete this profile
Feel free to message me if you want
Bye :)
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
50 quality responses
Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.
Today, I sat in my boss' office as he bitched me out for being "too sarcastic" to our customers. After nearly half an hour of him criticizing my "piss-poor attitude," he asked me what I was going to do to fix it. Without thinking, I said, "Your mom." Now I'm jobless again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6711) - you deserved it (47178)
On 02/10/2012 at 4:33pm - work - by great - United States
Today, I got into a fist-fight with a wasp, aka a Nazi helicopter. Despite swiping at it with ninja-like skills, I lost. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5469) - you deserved it (16100)
On 02/10/2012 at 9:13am - animals - by Stung (man) - United Kingdom
Today, my boyfriend came over to cheer me up after I'd had a sleepless night. He thought it would be a good time to propose. Unfortunately, it coincided with me yawning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18322) - you deserved it (3973)
On 02/10/2012 at 4:37am - love - by ohgodwhy (woman) - United States (California)
Today, things were getting hot with my boyfriend and I started to breathe heavy and moan. He then says to me, "Babe, can you calm down, we're having sex not running a marathon." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24625) - you deserved it (5584)
On 02/10/2012 at 12:31am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was invited over by my girlfriend's parents, but I couldn't bring myself to take part in their discussions. During a lull in conversation, I noticed everyone was staring at me. Covering myself while I tried to think of something to say, I grabbed an apple and took a bite. It was plastic. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22325) - you deserved it (6557) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. It's okay, though; she says we can still go on the vacation I planned next month for our 3 year anniversary, just "as friends." The tickets are non-refundable. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23634) - you deserved it (1722)
On 02/09/2012 at 2:02pm - love - by justfriends - United States
Today, my dad put in wall plug-ins that emit high frequencies that are suppose to ward off mice. I must be a mouse, because I can hear the annoying noise in every room I walk into. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16148) - you deserved it (1194)
On 02/09/2012 at 12:37am - misc - by Ihaveaheadache - United States (Texas)
Today, I was dumped. My boyfriend was too afraid to break up with me, so he sent the girl he cheated on me with. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28052) - you deserved it (1720)
On 02/06/2012 at 8:23pm - love - by Nanabanana1 (woman) - United States
Today, my girlfriend openly mocked me, calling me an idiot for thinking seahorses are real. She insists that they're like unicorns, and only exist in fiction. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31015) - you deserved it (3812)
On 02/06/2012 at 4:52pm - animals - by BoringFucker (man) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)
Today, I had to have a serious talk with my boyfriend about his Miley Cyrus obsession. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21845) - you deserved it (3653)
On 02/06/2012 at 5:08am - love - by Madzison (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, my fiancé has decided to become my cat's personal trainer. This includes talking to the cat, attempting to motivate him to run up and down the stairs and telling the cat to call him "Coach Daddy". I now have a crazy fiancé and a very angry cat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17288) - you deserved it (3871)
On 02/05/2012 at 3:00am - animals - by oh.geez (woman) - United States
Today, at around 2am, I was walking through a parking lot to my car when a man walking behind me told me not to be scared. I turned around to tell him there was no problem. He was naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26027) - you deserved it (1994) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I realised my girlfriend only has sex with me to make me exercise. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11598) - you deserved it (21917)
On 02/04/2012 at 5:16am - intimacy - by mattttbob - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, the pervert in my computer class asked me if I "mowed my lawn." Not knowing this was a vaguely sexual term, I replied, "No, my dad does." FML
I agree, your life sucks (33591) - you deserved it (6845)
On 02/03/2012 at 9:47am - intimacy - by xX_nsn_Xx (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, my boyfriend confessed to me that he purposely makes me angry, because when I'm angry, I clean, and it saves him having to do it himself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23155) - you deserved it (4289)
On 02/02/2012 at 3:56pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)
Monday 20 May 2013
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