About Dojan : I'm not actually a dog, I just pretend to be one.
Dojan's FML badges
50 quality responses
Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Dojan's favorite FMLs
by clairebear104 / 09/18/2014 at 11:15pm / United States (Kentucky) / Love
by Anonymous / 09/14/2014 at 12:38pm / Ghana (Greater Accra) / Animals
by Jamesfmled / 09/13/2014 at 10:01am / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 09/13/2014 at 2:56am / Canada (Alberta) / Animals
Today, some assface hacked my recently deceased friend's Facebook account. The person changed my friend's location to "Hell", then posted a status saying how hot the weather was, and replied "I wish :'(" to someone who'd said my friend was in a better place now. FML
by he's not the one going to hell / 09/12/2014 at 5:11pm / Australia / Geek
Today, my daughter was going to Bulk Barn so I asked her to pick me up something to snack on. When she got home, she brought over a bag and without listening to her explain what it was, I began eating it. She looked at me confused, then began laughing. It was a dog treat. FML
by oops... / 09/12/2014 at 1:50am / Canada (Alberta) / Kids
Today, my girlfriend went shopping at Victoria's Secret with me. While she was in the fitting room, her parents walked by and saw me. They don't approve of the store, so I panicked and told them I was considering becoming a woman. FML
by Anonymous / 09/09/2014 at 11:16pm / United States (California) / Love
Today, I had to take bus to work, because yesterday my car was hit by a bus. While standing there, I noticed the driver kept looking back at me every now and then. As I went to get off, he looks at me again and says: "Sorry..." FML
by crop circle galore / 09/05/2014 at 10:36pm / United States / Work
by cat lady / 08/30/2014 at 7:56am / Norway (Rogaland) / Animals
by Amithatevil / 08/29/2014 at 8:35am / Japan (Kanagawa) / Kids
Today, I went to get my hair cut. My stylist had the greatest tattoo of a rat on her arm. I spent the whole appointment thinking about how cool the tattoo was, and what an interesting person she must be to choose such a thing. So I complimented her on it and she said, "Oh it's a wolf." FML
by Etrius / 08/17/2014 at 11:19am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous
Today, it was a hot day and a woman walking in front of me collapsed. I helped her up, and I called an ambulance while she laid down. While we waited, two teenage girls walked past and I heard one say to the other, "I love how this city just lets people tan wherever". FML
by Anonymous / 08/13/2014 at 11:02pm / New Zealand / Kids
by not a dick-man / 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy
Today, I attended a family gathering. My cousin's new baby was being passed around. By way of politely declining to hold it, I meant to say that I looked forward to getting to know it better once it could talk. What I blurted out instead was, "I can't wait until it resembles a human being." FML
by marcranger / 08/11/2014 at 7:40pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids