I Love Dogs!
Today, I noticed a string was following behind our family cat. After close inspection I realized it was a plastic kite string he partially digested. I had to pull the other three feet of plastic kite tail from his rectum. He purred the entire time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39439) - you totally deserved it (2078)
On 07/03/2009 at 3:06pm - misc - by RachelDC (woman) - United States (West Virginia)
Today, I spent 4 hours carefully cleaning the inside and outside of my car. Fairly proud of the job I had done, I parked my car safely in my garage. Later, I opened my garage to find bird shit all over my car. Apparently birds get nervous when they get trapped in garages. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26874) - you totally deserved it (2985)
On 06/21/2009 at 5:41pm - misc - by FML (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I was walking my new dog and saw this girl that I've had a crush on for months. When I approached her, I tried to look 'macho' with my dog. However my dog thought it would be more attractive to pee on my leg. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29250) - you totally deserved it (6075)
On 06/09/2009 at 1:09pm - misc - by chris (man) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I used the restroom at a department store. While I was in my stall, I overheard a little girl say to her mother, "I see someone wearing pink!" I remembered that I was wearing pink just as she finished her thought, "And she's pooping." She was peeking at me through the stall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35932) - you totally deserved it (1596)
On 06/06/2009 at 10:25pm - kids - by Shelly (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, as a volunteer at the local daycare, I was with 3 and 4 year olds. They thought it would be funny to trip me and then jump on my back. I hit my elbow hard on the ground. A bunch of pre-schoolers beat me up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29383) - you totally deserved it (3413)
On 06/06/2009 at 7:46pm - kids - by biotch - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was driving on the motorway when a cop car made me stop. It was a routine check and when they said "Have you been drinking?" of course I said no. To that, my 6 year old sitting in the back screamed "Yes he did! He's lying I saw him drink!" I had drunk a milkshake. FML
I agree, your life sucks (57142) - you totally deserved it (2392)
On 06/04/2009 at 8:17am - kids - by Kimmiko (woman) - Germany (Niedersachsen)
Today, I allowed my five-year old daughter to paint my fingernails during a living-room "picnic" we were having. A while later I got called back in to work for an emergency meeting. When I arrived at the meeting I noticed my fingernails were still neon-green. I am a 40-year old man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33437) - you totally deserved it (9817)
On 06/03/2009 at 1:40pm - kids - by psychortiz (man) - United States (California)
Today, my husband of 9 years announced he was gay. He insinuated that he was only able to achieve erections because I looked like a man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (189853) - you totally deserved it (15638)
On 03/21/2009 at 3:15am - intimacy - by jilted (woman) - United States (Missouri)
[ Page : 1 ]
« Previous page | Next page »
