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DizzyyDee

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DizzyyDee
  • Town/Country : USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 587
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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DizzyyDee's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my brother sticking his erect penis through a donut. I doubt I'll ever be able to unsee this. FML

#20113997
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30442) - you deserved it (2480)

On 10/12/2012 at 7:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I had to eat my breakfast in terrified silence, as my hungover mother staggered into the room, shouted at the kettle for not boiling fast enough, and after a few seconds, screamed that I'd sabotaged it. I'm now grounded for supposedly trying to fuck with her head. FML

#20113953
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17351) - you deserved it (816)

On 10/12/2012 at 7:00pm - misc - by WTF (woman) - New Zealand (Waikato)

Today, my boyfriend and I were making out on his deck out back. When leaving, I heard the sliding glass door open on the upper deck, I froze in the yard to not be seen. Too bad I didn't move. Apparently his dad pees off the deck at night. I had to walk home covered in pee. FML

#20113299
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19132) - you deserved it (5285)

On 10/12/2012 at 7:11am - health - by monkeyzz (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after confronting my boyfriend about cheating on me, he confessed to everything. I was caught off guard by his honesty, but not nearly as caught off guard as I was when he eagerly questioned me on when our breakup sex will be. FML

#20113249
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26130) - you deserved it (2397)

On 10/12/2012 at 5:27am - intimacy - by You're NOT getting lucky today hun (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my new roommate showed me to my room, which I got a good deal on. I noticed a big black spot on the floor in the walk-in closet. When I asked, he said his last roommate committed suicide and he didn't want to pay to have the carpets professionally cleaned, hence the "good deal." FML

#20113152
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24056) - you deserved it (1687)

On 10/12/2012 at 2:36am - misc - by Dino (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I learned that scorpions can apparently hold their breath for hours, and that doing so makes them angry. I found this out when I removed a scorpion from the bottom of my pool and found that it was not entirely drowned. FML

#20112873
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21058) - you deserved it (1964)

On 10/11/2012 at 10:56pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my husband let me know he felt I was ignoring him by jabbing me in the right ear with his erect penis while I was Skyping with my mum overseas. FML

#20110803
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25604) - you deserved it (4017)

On 10/10/2012 at 5:48pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, my sister thought it would be funny to place a cardboard cut-out of a person at the foot of my bed. I woke up, saw the cut-out from the corner of my eye, fell out of bed, landed on my hand wrong, and broke two fingers. She got it all on video. FML

#20110797
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19341) - you deserved it (1770)

On 10/10/2012 at 5:44pm - misc - by scaredofcutouts (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I went to the surprise birthday party of an ex I still love, though I'm the one who ended things. I walked in in time to see her screaming "Yes" to her kneeling boyfriend, her parents crying and applauding, and her brothers patting him on the back. FML

#20110139
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8429) - you deserved it (43047)

On 10/10/2012 at 4:26am - love - by Toolate (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, I had my first orgasm. Unfortunately, it was during breakup sex. FML

#20110068
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24272) - you deserved it (7374)

On 10/10/2012 at 2:01am - intimacy - by Depression... (woman) - United States

Today, I applied for a job as a secretary. As I sat in the waiting room, the interviewer came out with his wife. She gave me a once-over, then said to her husband, "Hire this one. She's so ugly, you would never have an affair with her." FML

#20109957
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20244) - you deserved it (1101)

On 10/10/2012 at 12:15am - work - by caltech (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that my daughter's "pen pal" is really a 58-year-old man in prison. FML

#20109821
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22034) - you deserved it (2490)

On 10/09/2012 at 10:59pm - kids - by ohgod. - United States (Florida)

Today, after great sex with my boyfriend, I lay in my bed while he went to get a drink from downstairs. Hearing someone come up, I shouted out as a joke, "Damn babe, I'm covered in cum, was there a hole you didn't fill?" It wasn't my boyfriend, it was my dad. FML

#20109762
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14253) - you deserved it (55655)

On 10/09/2012 at 10:32pm - intimacy - by cumhole (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a customer handed me a 100 dollar bill. He then told me that it was my tip for doing a good job. He snatched it away just as I touched it, laughed, and said, "Just kidding." He then took his money and left the store. FML

#20109681
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19979) - you deserved it (1829)

On 10/09/2012 at 9:57pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my 6-year-old son pooped in the back yard and used a stick to throw it over the fence into my neighbor's yard. FML

#20109382
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17455) - you deserved it (2819)

On 10/09/2012 at 6:56pm - kids - by fionnathehuman - United States



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Thursday 10 April 2014

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