DishHeads

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DishHeads

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 14 November 1992 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4807
  • Number of comments : 47
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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DishHeads's page activity

Visits<b>alice192823</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 9:46pm<b>sky_R03</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 2:54pm<b>Hilda_x</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 3:40pm<b>smeegle</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 7:20pm<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 11/06/2015 at 8:33pm<b>iT_Cereal</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 4:42am<b>MenacingMe</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 2:26pm<b>Internetdude</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 6:00am<b>trevieh47</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 6:58pm<b>jess98713</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 10:38pm<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 5:27pm<b>YouMadBra</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 6:20pm<b>PageantGirlXOXO</b> - the 05/25/2014 at 9:06pm<b>jh1129</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 9:36am<b>jefsayed</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 4:20pm<b>squaregarden29</b> - the 09/08/2013 at 8:20am<b>hunteryager</b> - the 08/17/2013 at 5:42am<b>Ali56</b> - the 08/01/2013 at 12:41am

DishHeads's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of DishHeads's badges

DishHeads's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend refered to her vagina as a meat wallet, and to my penis as small change. FML

by trembelwick / 12/03/2011 at 5:04am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend agreed to doing it doggy style. During it all, I pulled on her hair. I guess I pulled too hard, because when I let go, her face smacked straight into the bedside table. FML

by Henry / 11/11/2011 at 5:29pm / Norway (Hordaland) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend has a new obsession: grabbing my junk and whispering in my ear the song, "Baby, Imma Be Your Motivation." Problem? I get an instant boner and she only does it in public, because it's "funny as hell." FML

by InstantHardOn / 11/07/2011 at 11:43pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, as I was walking back to my dorm, I looked down and thought "I wonder why the ground is wet in just this one spot." Then I got hit with a water balloon. FML

by Kirby / 11/06/2011 at 11:50pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was trying to get my boyfriend in the mood so I held his hands against the bed, and whispered, "Have you been a bad boy?" Thinking he'd say something kinky back, he replied "Yes Santa" then burst out laughing. FML

by HOe HOe HOe / 11/01/2011 at 10:36pm / United States (Hawaii) / Intimacy

Today, I saw my upstairs neighbor outside getting the mail. She asked how my day was, and then apologized that the sound of her baby's crying through the walls kept me up last night. Apparently she heard me when I yelled at 2am for her fucking demon spawn to shut up. FML

by Deborah / 10/27/2011 at 2:41am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home from work to my 3 year old daughter sniffing the rug in the living room. When I asked her what she was doing she said "Daddy smell this." So I went, got on my knees and bent down to smell it and she pushed my face in the dog crap smeared in the rug. FML

by me / 10/22/2011 at 10:06pm / United States (Maine) / Kids

Today, I ran into an old friend. I asked her how she was doing, then asked, "And your mum?" Just as the words escaped my lips, I remembered her mum died a few years ago. Trying to save face, I messed up again and blurted, "She still in the same graveyard?" FML

by Virginiedetibo / 10/21/2011 at 10:09pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, my best friend who I have known for ten years recommended I didn't continue a relationship with my girlfriend. I thought she wanted to go out with me which I was hoping for, for a long time. Turns out she wanted to go out with her. FML

by anonymous / 10/19/2011 at 8:19am / Australia (Victoria) / Love

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me for the first time. He stopped just as I was about to orgasm, and asked if I could finish by myself. Apparently he'd come up with a new algorithm for the Rubik's Cube on my desk and wanted to try it out. FML

by Kayt / 10/03/2011 at 12:38am / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, out of my bedroom window, I can see my next door neighbour's window. On his ledge, I can see binoculars, tissues and vaseline. FML

by Anonymous / 09/24/2011 at 3:22am / United Kingdom (London) / Intimacy

Today, the shy girl in my class decided to bring a cake to share with everyone, since it was her birthday. Excited about the cake, I got everybody to sing "happy birthday" for her, only to realize too late that nobody in the class know her name, myself included. FML

by mortenp / 09/22/2011 at 12:44am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I caught my husband farting on my wind-chime in an attempt to make it ring. It did. FML

by Anonymous / 09/05/2011 at 8:05am / Reserved / Miscellaneous

Today, I decided to work out. Being too embarrassed to run in public, I instead ran in circles in my basement. FML

by Anonymous / 09/05/2011 at 12:38am / Canada (Quebec) / Health

Today, I found my husband Googling Morse Code. He thinks his farts are trying to communicate with him. FML

by KJL / 08/29/2011 at 11:38am / United States / Health