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Disembob

Offline (the 02/23/2014 at 12:53pm) | Search for a member

Disembob

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 18 June 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2342
  • Number of comments : 31
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 22 posted

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Disembob's page activity

Visits<b>thinmintgal</b> - the 05/20/2014 at 4:09pm<b>mattmsk001</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 12:12am<b>Tezoma</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 12:48pm<b>phoneaddict13</b> - the 02/13/2014 at 9:17am<b>stripes97</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 10:41pm<b>jaffvis</b> - the 08/06/2013 at 12:32am<b>stonage81</b> - the 07/30/2013 at 10:37pm<b>adambomb8181</b> - the 07/26/2013 at 12:13am<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 10:50am<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 07/03/2013 at 10:47pm<b>Alwaysontherun</b> - the 06/08/2013 at 5:08pm<b>KaiserCreame</b> - the 04/22/2013 at 9:41pm<b>alexmill</b> - the 04/22/2013 at 3:11pm<b>judgmentalbitch</b> - the 03/25/2013 at 8:28am<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 03/07/2013 at 1:42pm<b>HaneenDixon</b> - the 02/25/2013 at 8:39pm<b>Starter</b> - the 02/09/2013 at 4:39pm<b>iOceanus</b> - the 02/09/2013 at 1:22am

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Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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Disembob's favorite FMLs

Today, I wanted to punish a student for being late. I decided to start a pop quiz before he arrived. I was positive there wasn't enough time for him to finish. He scored full marks and I couldn't say a word. FML

#12693453
303 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8144) - you deserved it (67937)

On 08/23/2010 at 12:18am - kids - by K_M (man) - Malaysia (Selangor)

Today, my incredibly self conscious girlfriend decided to get over her fears and let me see her in her underwear. She did a short strip tease, crawled on top of me and asked what I thought. I couldn't think of anything to say besides, "Your bra and panties don't match." FML

#12626936
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9309) - you deserved it (76477)

On 08/19/2010 at 3:16pm - intimacy - by captainocd - United States (Texas)

Today, I came home from vacation to discover that one of my friends had broken into my house, painted my room a hideous color, ruined my hardwood floors with the paint, and left huge mess for me to clean. When I confronted her about it, she called me ungrateful. Everyone I know agrees with her. FML

Today, my boyfriend woke up wheezing terribly, aching, and sneezing. He's allergic to cats. I have 2 and they are my babies. He gave me an ultimatum, him or the cats. I haven't figured out how I'm going to tell him that I choose the cats. FML

#11892706
446 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18825) - you deserved it (59931)

On 07/15/2010 at 2:53am - love - by BambooLove (woman) - United States

Today, I finally met the guy I've been talking to online for a year. I'd dropped 10lbs off my weight. He'd shaved 20 years off his age. FML

#11364418
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13565) - you deserved it (34664)

On 06/21/2010 at 8:27pm - love - by keisha89 (woman) - United States

Today, I woke up at 10:30 feeling great and saying to myself, "Thank goodness it's the weekend!" I then realized it's Friday and I missed my final. FML

#10973350
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17701) - you deserved it (32212)

On 06/04/2010 at 7:58pm - misc - by H05T1L3 (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was having an affair with a girl from my work. She scratched my back while we were doing it and I didn't want my wife to find out so I threw myself down the stairs at work and ended up having to go to the hospital. FML

#10658705
509 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14788) - you deserved it (236027)

On 05/20/2010 at 10:33pm - intimacy - by Chichensoup (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was having an affair with a girl from my work. She scratched my back while we were doing it and I didn't want my wife to find out so I threw myself down the stairs at work and ended up having to go to the hospital. FML

#10658705
509 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14788) - you deserved it (236027)

On 05/20/2010 at 10:33pm - intimacy - by Chichensoup (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I'm having a nice evening out on the town. After my complimentary round of drinks for my birthday, my friend walks in with a big pink gift-box. It was an inflatable... erm... 'friend.' Which then got unwrapped in front of several of my other friends. And several members of my family. FML

#10396972
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24393) - you deserved it (4315)

On 05/07/2010 at 4:30am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I'm having a nice evening out on the town. After my complimentary round of drinks for my birthday, my friend walks in with a big pink gift-box. It was an inflatable... erm... 'friend.' Which then got unwrapped in front of several of my other friends. And several members of my family. FML

#10396972
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24393) - you deserved it (4315)

On 05/07/2010 at 4:30am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, after church, my 5-year-old son asked me about God, so I answered his questions in full. We talked about God for over 2 hours. At the end of it all, he pondered for a moment, before saying to me "That's the stupidest thing I ever heard. You're dumb." FML

#9721953
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24669) - you deserved it (55450)

On 04/08/2010 at 12:27am - kids - by bleredoshia (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I was sitting on the toilet when I felt something brush my shoulder. I turned around in fright, and one of my bum cheeks slipped off the seat and into the toilet, making me fall sideways and hit my face on the toilet roll holder. I now have a black eye. It was my hair on my shoulder. FML

#9068483
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10623) - you deserved it (19821)

On 03/14/2010 at 6:50am - misc - by Hatty (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I dropped my physics class because I thought I bombed the 50% second midterm test. I got my results an hour after dropping online. I finished with an 83. I can't get back into the course. FML

#8945692
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6354) - you deserved it (55995)

On 03/09/2010 at 1:42pm - love - by mizzleshizzle - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I agreed to let my boyfriend cover every inch of my body in whipped cream and lick it off. We were both enjoying it until his 9 year old sister walked in and started crying. FML

#8890644
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11430) - you deserved it (20062)

On 03/07/2010 at 10:46am - intimacy - by fml (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, at work a really hot guy came up to me and asked "what are your hours?" Excited, I told him I get off at 4 but might be able to get out sooner. He started laughing and then said "I meant your store hours". He turned around and walked away, shaking his head and laughing. FML

#8293432
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12492) - you deserved it (28230)

On 02/15/2010 at 9:29am - work - by Dumbdumb (woman) - United States (New York)



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