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Dillywillyfoo

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Dillywillyfoo

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  • Number of visits : 1397
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Visits<b>blueflygon</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 3:56am<b>xALEXx</b> - the 05/14/2013 at 12:38am<b>The_Honey_Badger</b> - the 04/28/2013 at 11:53pm<b>SkoomaKi</b> - the 03/23/2013 at 2:52pm<b>RebornUnicorn</b> - the 03/05/2013 at 12:48am<b>Puptaku</b> - the 02/19/2013 at 1:49pm

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Today, I walked past a few of my coworkers sitting outside smoking. As I got a whiff of the smoke, I coughed. They immediately started to defend their habit, and I was told to "mind my own fucking business." I wasn't trying to be rude; I'm actually allergic to cigarette smoke. FML

#20507668
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33491) - you deserved it (3674)

On 02/15/2013 at 12:53am - health - by youmindyourownbusiness - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had to explain to my white girlfriend that dating me doesn't give her the right to call my mother the n-word. FML

#20507523
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39907) - you deserved it (8534)

On 02/14/2013 at 11:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I had to use a dictionary before I realized I was being flirted with. FML

#20506101
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25626) - you deserved it (10896)

On 02/14/2013 at 6:01am - love - by lex - United States

Today, while riding the train home, I noticed a man who kept looking at me. Annoyed, I told him to be less obvious and to stop staring. He promptly responded, "Bitch, I'm gay, and even I can tell no one would want to look at you." FML

#20505985
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12459) - you deserved it (52876)

On 02/14/2013 at 2:39am - misc - by assoutofuandme (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was super hungry and went to a Thai restaurant. The waitress left two small bowls of fried rice on the counter, and I thought they were for me. I ate one and a lady came over screaming. Apparently the small cups of rice was part of a religious ceremony. FML

#20503300
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26118) - you deserved it (16753)

On 02/12/2013 at 3:04am - misc - by Thai rice mistake - United States (California)

Today, I was walking with my friend. The girl in front of us had a really nice ass, so I turned to my friend and said, "Damn, she has a perfect ass." He replied, "That's a guy." FML

#20502853
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10397) - you deserved it (34204)

On 02/11/2013 at 9:30pm - misc - by notgay (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I spoke to my crush for the first time, and after a while he asked for my number. Ecstatic, I took the first piece of paper I saw out of my purse. I wrote it down and gave it to him, but he handed it back and said, "You might need this." It was an appointment card for my therapist. FML

#20502338
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29353) - you deserved it (7176)

On 02/11/2013 at 2:19pm - love - by sofuckingembarassing. (woman) - United States

Today, it's my boyfriend's birthday. He really likes Legend of Zelda, so I put on a Link hat, took my clothes off, and waited for him at his place. He came home with a hooker. FML

#20502217
172 comments

Today, a girl came up to me on the street and said, "You have like no swag, bro." Feeling clever, I said, "At least I have a high school education." She then took out her work ID, showing me that she was a surgeon, flipped me off, then walked away saying, "This is totally going on Facebook." FML

#20502122
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29595) - you deserved it (27417)

On 02/11/2013 at 10:26am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I casually mentioned to my dad that it was the Chinese New Year yesterday. He accused me of insulting his intelligence by "making stupid shit up." I explained that it's real, and that we just use the Gregorian calendar, hence the different dates. He responded by grounding me. FML

#20501411
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29772) - you deserved it (4065)

On 02/10/2013 at 8:00pm - misc - by must be adopted (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my little sister chased me around the house with a mallet, giggling like a maniac. I ended up having to pin her to the ground, rip the mallet out of her hand and lock her in the bathroom. This isn't the first time. My mom still insists it's perfectly normal. FML

#20500833
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33684) - you deserved it (2634)

On 02/10/2013 at 11:17am - kids - by littlemiss - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out I'm pregnant. My husband had a vasectomy this past summer after our son was born and only took one of the two tests. I haven't cheated. He refuses to believe me or get his spunk checked again. FML

#20500417
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34324) - you deserved it (3288)

On 02/10/2013 at 12:17am - misc - by Totallyscrewed - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my fiancé told me that it would be okay with him if I got plastic surgery to make my boobs larger. It would also be okay with him if I didn't get the surgery, but he would call off our engagement and never talk to me again. FML

#20499439
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51800) - you deserved it (6005)

On 02/09/2013 at 11:11am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to drive to my workplace in blizzard conditions. Now that my 12 hour shift is over, I can't get out of the building, as the snow has blown into large drifts in front of the doors. I have to stay overnight until my next 12 hour shift. FML

Today, I got permission from my parents for my boyfriend to stay over. Things got intimate, and I tried my hardest not to make too much noise. However, while having a post-sex cuddle, we heard my parents in the next room muttering about my "faking". FML

#20498986
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19791) - you deserved it (40604)

On 02/09/2013 at 12:08am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Somerset)



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